sandy299

Hello All!

Well, around last August I got baby fever really bad. I had it really bad until a few weeks ago. All of a sudden I have done a 360. My dh said he wasn't ready to have kids yet. We needed to work on some things financially and he just felt not ready. I am 32 and he is 30. I was pressuring him a lot. He told me if I stopped talking he'd feel more ready. We set a date to talk about ttc in Jan '09. I was happy.

Now in the past few weeks after visitng his friends who have just had kids, I feel like i am just not ready to be a parent yet. I feel we still have things we need to do. Like my dh said one of the things he really wanted to do was take a vacation. He said we probably wouldn't get to do it bc I was in a rush to ttc and we are going to buy a house, get a new car save up baby $ and pay off some debt. He said there was no way we could do it and ttc by the beginning of next year.

So, now I am working full time and exhausted when I come home wondering how will I ever do this with a baby? I take a nap on weekends or have a party and realize I still want to do things before we ttc. So, I have told myself I want to take a vacation. I see so many of you doing it before you ttc and I know I will regret it if I don't even if it means we have to wait longer. I hope by then that I will be ready. I just don't feel ready anymore to be a mom.

I think sometimes it is eaiser to have an oops than plan b/c I think I will get scared no matter how long or not long I wait.

I guess I felt left out when a lot of people I knew were getting pg since most of them had been married less than my dh and I were. We'll be married 6 yrs this month. But, now after seeing them with a baby I realize that I'm just truly not ready yet.

I haven't told my dh and not sure if I should or wait until we talk in January to say something just in case I change my mind again. I think a big part of me too was that I felt I was getting old and I had heard so much about being over 35 and not being able to ttc. But I was on a board and realized there are so many women over 35 having kids that I don't need to worry. I am OK now that if I have my first baby at 35 and not in such of a hurry as before. Anyone been in a simular situation? I think dh and I might still set a date in Jan. I guess we'll see. I am OK if we wait until mid or late 2009 to decide to ttc now.

Sandy

LeaArr

Welcome,

I don't know if anyone is ready to have a baby, but when it happens, it seems to work out. Best of luck with anything you choose to do.

MrsKeene

Hello!
I feel that ttc, wheather your 20, or 35 should only be up to you and your husband. Its when you feel you are ready to try! Though you will always worry about something, when in your heart you don't have anything holding you back instead of your mind, thats when i think you know your ready. And than like you said sometimes it just happens, like it did with our first little one! Best of luck to you and your hubby, and just follow your heart, everything else will fall into place

Wow i am corny

owo

Don't feel pressured by what every one else is doing. This is a big step and only you and DH can decide when is right for you.
If there are things you want to do first then do them. I decided i wanted to get another skiing holiday in before i started TTC and I'm really glad i did and we had a wonderful time, this is know was something that was going to be out of the question for a few years.
Sometimes it is ok to be selfish and do what you want and not follow the crowd with what they are doing.
Take Care

Vickie

I agree 100% with owo. Good luck when you do decide to TTC!

flump1

i agree with owo, dont feel pressured and feel like you have to rush into something that you dont feel ready for yet.

Best of luck for whatever you decide
xxxxxxx