Thanks honey. I have had great support from you guys and ppl in my life. Its amazing what you can handle with caring friends and family. I have a feeling he will bend to this 'ultimatim' but I am not happy with the interaction. He has been lazy (its been 2 years since we started down this road), he has withheld information from me, springs things on me when I have warned him I am fragile (during my coming off meds) and this is all not on. I am not compromising this, its my future too he keeps messing with.... and that is the most unacceptable thing of all. I gave him my future but now he is abusing the power.

Hey Alchemist

Support is what you need and I am pleased that you have a close network. I hope that he does come round but you are right, it is your future he is messing with and that is totally unfair.

You sound so strong about this which is half the battle. It sounds like you wont be the one bowing down. You stick to your guns and I pray that you both work this out.

You know this situation has hit a raw nerve with me. Any time you want to chat, you know where I am.

xx

In reading your previous posts Alch, it seems your hubby has this fear that he will not have your full undivided attention. It's almost like he's afraid you won't love him anymore. Yes life will be different, but it doesn't mean you aren't still husband and wife, and it doesn't mean you will love him any less! It kinda sounds like he's more insecure with himself than you. Hopefully therapy will help.

i agree totally. anyways, i am leaving it alone and letting him stew for a bit
we have therapy tom so we'll see

Take good care of yourself Alch!

huni, i totally understand

just want to say i'm thinking of you and here to listen if you want to talk x

thanks girls. we are seeing our shrinly dink today. we broached the subject tentatively last night (after i sent him a scathing email which he said was angry to which i replied that i preferred to think of it as assertive). ha ha. always the thing when a woman is assertive she is a bitch.......

anyways, he told me he wanted to move forwards. I didnt get my hopes up as I have dcided the real issue here is his lack of respect of my needs. If he wants to make this marriage work it is going to take sustainable efforts on his side not just spurts when i am freaking out. its not good for me. it wears me down and leaves me feeling unloved.......

anyways. thats where we are tday. so no decisions.but i am not allowing the decision making process solely contain his requirements any longer. he needs to grow up and stop acting out like a child and have respect for me. if he hasnt in the past, i am partly to blaim for that (allowing him to walk over my needs) but no more. He should love me regardless of the way we negotiate things. i will not give but my dreams at the expense of my fears....

onwards and upwards girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good luck lovely, will be thinking of you both today

Hope you get one step towards a resolve.

Will try and pop by later to see how you are doing

xxx

I totally understand. Six years ago I gave birth to a little boy. I got preggo with him after having 3 miscarriages. I almost lost him so many times. I too am waiting to try. I am currently not trying but due to an accident recently, I am hoping for a positive result.

well good luck on the postive result honey :-)