Men and their stupid mixed signals!

Vesta · Dec 19th, 2009, 09:55 AM

My husband and I were due to start TTC this month. But my DH came up with some bullshit excuse to postpone it until god knows when. I had some contraceptive pills left over from before so started taking them again. I went to the doctors on Friday to get more. When I got home I had the following conversation with my husband.

Me - "The doctor suggested I go on the implant instead. It's more reliable as we don't have to rely on me taking the pill every morning. What do you think?"

DH - "Nah. Stay on the pill. It doesn't really matter does it?"

Me - "What doesn't matter?"

DH - "If you get pregnant."

Me - "I thought you didn't want a baby?"

DH - "I dont."

Me -

What planet is he on? Because it's not the same one as me!

Rumpskin · Dec 19th, 2009, 09:58 AM

I have had many mixed conversations with my OH and sometimes we still go round in circles.

Let things settle and have another try.

Good luck xxx

plutosblue · Dec 19th, 2009, 14:03 PM

Aw hun

I know how you feel DF is driving me nuts with his logic

He doesn't want me to be a fat (as in pregnant) bride, yet he doesn't want to use protection which may result in baby to which he replies, "I don't mind"

Does that make sense to you? I dont think so !

I agree with Rumpskin, let the dust settle and try approach the subject again.

angie79 · Dec 19th, 2009, 14:17 PM

when the time comes i damn know my oh will be exactly the same
why is it they dont like the lets try thing but doesnt mind if you was to fall pregnant without trying
i think they are just lazy to bother trying and just want it on a plate

either that or not sure what they want

i will never understand men and there minds its so confusing

i feel for you

xx

Blob · Dec 19th, 2009, 18:17 PM

Argh i got the same thing...the morning...lets try for a baby...by that night oh dont we should now

Bambi1985 · Dec 20th, 2009, 16:07 PM

Soooo true, OH has just said ha doesn't want a baby but we can start trying for one on feb

goddess25 · Dec 21st, 2009, 18:54 PM

Hmmm men they dont have a clue. That is certainly a very mixed message he is giving there. I would talk to him about it in a week or so.. it sounds like he is too scared to comit to actually proper trying for a baby but if it happens, it happens and that is probably not so scary to him. Not sure why though!!!! The outcome is still the same.

happynbubbly · Dec 21st, 2009, 23:25 PM

lol. For me and the OH it's the opposite, almost every time we BD he always asks me if I want one. Usually right before we get to it. I answer different almost every time, and I don't know why, maybe because I do want one, but I know it's really not a good time. He's crazy about having kids with me, but he respects my decision in waiting. His whole thing he said just this morning was "We're problem-solvers, we could figure it out if we did". To which I said, "Yes, we are, but why complicate life when it complicates itself enough on its own?" Sometimes I do get hormonal and plead with him to get me pregnant, but he knows its not a serious conversation, and knows my cycle and when to actually listen to me lol.

sleepinbeauty · Dec 26th, 2009, 13:41 PM

My OH is the same. We had 2 night of unprotected sex when he knows I just missed the 1st 3 pills in my pack from being sick this weekend. But he doesn't want kids yet. But we "shouldn't cry over spilt milk". But he doesn't want kids yet.

I'm starting to think someone is a litte more ok with kids than he says!

Lou · Dec 27th, 2009, 11:06 AM

hmm my OH's the same... I have a feeling I'll be back to WTT pretty soon as we pretty much are.

/

OH told me we should NTNP (and I was over the moon about it,) so when we went to DTD he clammed up and tried to put a condom on, to which I said, why? (cos we're meant to be NTNP in his words - not mine) and he said, 'cos we might get you pregnant.' I was just like... 'you do realise what Not-trying-Not-Preventing means dont you dear?' anyway we didnt end up doing the deed that night... then the next night we were about to do it and I went.. 'condom?' and he went... 'Doesn't really matter does it?'.. talk about mixed signals?!?!?!

Anyway - I think im guna come back over to WTT, until OH's hearts properly involved (and not just his penis) I'm going to fight that annoying urge to be preggers.

Men eh?! At least we have each other girls!
xxxx

Dec 19th, 2009, 09:55 AM	#1
Vesta Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 829	Men and their stupid mixed signals! My husband and I were due to start TTC this month. But my DH came up with some bullshit excuse to postpone it until god knows when. I had some contraceptive pills left over from before so started taking them again. I went to the doctors on Friday to get more. When I got home I had the following conversation with my husband. Me - "The doctor suggested I go on the implant instead. It's more reliable as we don't have to rely on me taking the pill every morning. What do you think?" DH - "Nah. Stay on the pill. It doesn't really matter does it?" Me - "What doesn't matter?" DH - "If you get pregnant." Me - "I thought you didn't want a baby?" DH - "I dont." Me - What planet is he on? Because it's not the same one as me!

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Dec 19th, 2009, 09:58 AM	#2
Rumpskin Other BnB Addict Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 7,261	I have had many mixed conversations with my OH and sometimes we still go round in circles. Let things settle and have another try. Good luck xxx

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Dec 19th, 2009, 14:03 PM	#3
plutosblue Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Cambrigeshire. Posts: 5,859	Aw hun I know how you feel DF is driving me nuts with his logic He doesn't want me to be a fat (as in pregnant) bride, yet he doesn't want to use protection which may result in baby to which he replies, "I don't mind" Does that make sense to you? I dont think so ! I agree with Rumpskin, let the dust settle and try approach the subject again.

Status: Offline

Dec 19th, 2009, 14:17 PM	#4
angie79 Pregnant (Expecting) BnB Addict Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: herts Posts: 6,554	when the time comes i damn know my oh will be exactly the same why is it they dont like the lets try thing but doesnt mind if you was to fall pregnant without trying i think they are just lazy to bother trying and just want it on a plate either that or not sure what they want i will never understand men and there minds its so confusing i feel for you xx

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Dec 19th, 2009, 18:17 PM	#5
Blob Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Posts: 12,712	Argh i got the same thing...the morning...lets try for a baby...by that night oh dont we should now

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Dec 20th, 2009, 16:07 PM	#6
Bambi1985 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Southampton Posts: 676	Soooo true, OH has just said ha doesn't want a baby but we can start trying for one on feb

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Dec 21st, 2009, 18:54 PM	#7
goddess25 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: vancouver Posts: 5,591	Hmmm men they dont have a clue. That is certainly a very mixed message he is giving there. I would talk to him about it in a week or so.. it sounds like he is too scared to comit to actually proper trying for a baby but if it happens, it happens and that is probably not so scary to him. Not sure why though!!!! The outcome is still the same.

Status: Offline

Dec 21st, 2009, 23:25 PM	#8
happynbubbly Waiting To Try (WTT) Active BnB Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 195	lol. For me and the OH it's the opposite, almost every time we BD he always asks me if I want one. Usually right before we get to it. I answer different almost every time, and I don't know why, maybe because I do want one, but I know it's really not a good time. He's crazy about having kids with me, but he respects my decision in waiting. His whole thing he said just this morning was "We're problem-solvers, we could figure it out if we did". To which I said, "Yes, we are, but why complicate life when it complicates itself enough on its own?" Sometimes I do get hormonal and plead with him to get me pregnant, but he knows its not a serious conversation, and knows my cycle and when to actually listen to me lol.

Status: Offline

Dec 26th, 2009, 13:41 PM	#9
sleepinbeauty Waiting To Try (WTT) BnB Addict Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: NY, USA Posts: 3,298	My OH is the same. We had 2 night of unprotected sex when he knows I just missed the 1st 3 pills in my pack from being sick this weekend. But he doesn't want kids yet. But we "shouldn't cry over spilt milk". But he doesn't want kids yet. I'm starting to think someone is a litte more ok with kids than he says!

Status: Offline

Dec 27th, 2009, 11:06 AM	#10
Lou Waiting To Try (WTT) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Cheltenham/Liverpool Posts: 1,093	hmm my OH's the same... I have a feeling I'll be back to WTT pretty soon as we pretty much are. / OH told me we should NTNP (and I was over the moon about it,) so when we went to DTD he clammed up and tried to put a condom on, to which I said, why? (cos we're meant to be NTNP in his words - not mine) and he said, 'cos we might get you pregnant.' I was just like... 'you do realise what Not-trying-Not-Preventing means dont you dear?' anyway we didnt end up doing the deed that night... then the next night we were about to do it and I went.. 'condom?' and he went... 'Doesn't really matter does it?'.. talk about mixed signals?!?!?! Anyway - I think im guna come back over to WTT, until OH's hearts properly involved (and not just his penis) I'm going to fight that annoying urge to be preggers. Men eh?! At least we have each other girls! xxxx

Status: Offline

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