I am so taken aback by all of the wonderful posts you've taken time to send to me on my journal. I honestly did not think anyone would even read it.
Thank you. You're all providing me with a warm, supportive place to talk about my TTC journey. This support network is not something that I have "in real life" right now as I haven't told anyone IRL that I'm TTC yet.
You've all really made my day and lifted my spirits.
Sigh... when AF's in town, there's really not much to do but wait for ovulation, huh?
I visited my cousin and her new baby this weekend. Seeing that little guy again reminded me how much I am longing for a baby of my own. I'm really aching to be part of that world - "Mommy" world.
It's funny how quickly I've turned around. Just this last summer, I was saying to DH, "You know, I'm still not ready for kids yet. They are so much work and once you have them, your life will never be the same again (and not in a good way). I don't know if I ever want kids!"
One day in September, I casually decided to flip through a book about pregnancy. Within days of flippin' through that book, I suddenly felt ready to be a Mommy. Don't know what did it for me... I JUST KNEW.
Once I realized I wanted to be a Mommy, I wanted to be one RIGHT NOW! You can imagine how frustrated and useless I felt when I learned about the whole folic acid issue.
What?? I have to take at least 3 months of pre-natal vitamins before I can even START trying to get pregnant? Wait a minute.. if I hadn't taken the time to educate myself about being pregnant and just decided to go ahead and start having unprotected sex, then I wouldn't have known a thing about folic acid and neural tube defects. How many other women out there know about folic acid??
ARGH.. if I had known about that three month wait earlier, I would have started those pre-natals waaay earlier than I did. Even more importantly, if I had known it would be so difficult for DH and I to conceive, I would have started TTC waaay earlier too.
When I let myself dwell on this, I feel pretty duped. Why didn't I know all this earlier?
Cloudy, I have a perfect DS and I didn't start taking folic acid until I realised I was PG...so don't panic!!! If you eat green veg like spinach etc then you will already have a good amount in your system!
So... now it's onto the new milestone for this month... how 'bout "conceive before my 30th b-day in the summer so I'll be conceiving with a 29-year old egg"? That one'll last me for a few months. Perhaps I can allow myself to relax now!
Is it absolutely stupid, selfish, etc. of me to hope to conceive within certain timeframes? Of course, I'd be absolutely delighted to conceive any old time but it would just make it so much sweeter if it could happen soon.
I've had that exact same one. The 29 yo egg. I only have 2 s till I have to drop it though LOL
Neah, it's not stupid and selfish but it puts a heck of a load of stress on you. I've relaxed and felt like I can breath again once I've decided I can give myself time and we can take it slowly and sort our health and our fertility issues -his- and then it will happen. I can tell you that once I stopped wanting it THIS DANG MONTH it did feel better.
Good luck and welcome to your journal.
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in for you this cycle 
- how are u this morning hun?! 
s till I have to drop it though LOL
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