Nic

Yum, yum!!!!

Tishimouse

For therapeutic reasons I've removed my original post.

I feel I've dealt with the issue and don't want to read it again. In the big scheme of things, a problem is just something you haven't dealt with yet (very deep).

There, much better now and thank to those who helped. I hope to be able to return the favour some time in the future if the need arises.

Alexandra

I thanked you on that one for expressing a deeply personal aspect that I know was not easy to put into words and which we are all going through to an extent or another.

While I know you don't need advice and you are perfectly aware of what the best steps to take are -e.g. openly and calmly talk about this with him to sort both of your feelings- I still have to say that as grandiose as this place is, and it undoubtedly is so, it's not the best place for romantic advice I've ever seen.

You have to remember we're all in the same boat and have very far from clear heads while ttc-ing. This makes for more of an empathic atmosphere than in our mothers' arms but it doesn't make for very level, rational advice. What I'd recommend -and I hope that's okay and not considered spam- is to choose another name and sign up on loveshack.org. It's an amazing relationship experts' forum where you are sure to find tools for that conversation from techniques to keep calm to ways to express yourself so that it is a dialog not a couple of monologues.

I know we haven't known each other since Adam but feel free to PM me if you want to talk about this and a few pointers in how to conduct that convo.

Best of luck and have a couple of scotch jellies!

Tishimouse

Hi Kypris,

Thank you so much for that. I will have a look at the website for sure and will wait until I am ready to have the conversation with him as it hasn't gone so well in the past. I am a really confident person in so many walks of life and can see solutions to other people's problems all the time. However, with this subject I just don't seem to have the balance right.

Also, thanks for the offer of PM'g you ... really that's very kind of you indeed.

I'm going to come back to this later though as I have a deadline to meet for a project I'm working on. It's due 2 April, so I need to concentrate on that this morning. Am signing off now, but will return. for your help.

NeyNey

It takes a lot to open up to what most people would only consider strangers.

The first offer of comfort I can give is knowing that this feeling is not just singled to yourself, I want you to know that others feel what you're feeling, so don't let yourself feel isolated and alone. You have a world of people who are ready to offer you advice and comfort in this little family.

Like Ky said already - I know you know what to do with talking etc, so there's little advice I can offer that you don't already know. I've done the same thing as you, started to open up to DH only to end up in tears and unable to finish the conversation. You sound like you have a wonderful man though, and I know in time you will get your feelings out.

Good luck Tish, I know this journey sometimes feels like we're running through a full fledged battleground, but at least you're not running alone.

Tishimouse

Oh boy, just popped back on to let you know we have actually had a chat already. When he got up, he could see that I was a bit subdued. It's not difficult to spot as I'm normally very cheerful. Our 'chat' just happened without planning and although we covered old ground, I think this time he really was listening.

He came out with all the stuff I had been thinking about and said that he knows I must still be coming on here (I didn't deny it). He was worried that I would become obsessed and let the forums take over my life. Well ... the less said about that the better (I am supposed to be studying).

We talked about lots of things in relation to ttc and he wants me to tell him when the best time are ... sniff! I'm so happy about that. His point is that sometimes it might not be possible as he may be too tired or it just may not be a good time and we both have to accept that ... sniff! Oh poor boy, it's got to be a pressure thing. Then he said that he's not as young as he used to be ... sniff! I wish we had to have met when we were in our 20's (he's 40 and I'm 45).

However, the important thing is that we will try and if we succeed then fantastic as he really wants us to have a baby together and if we don't, then at least we had a good go.

I feel a lot better now.

Alexandra

That is seriously rocking news hon!

You can still use my PM if you wish, yanno!

Capuru

Phexia

I'm glad he listened to you, sounds like a good man you have there.

TrixieLox

Sorry I missed the post you deleted but can understand, I've done the same on here. Sounds like things are cool now so well done hon. You get on with your studying, OK, and don't you worry about visiting this forum. I tried to stop for a few weeks but couldn't keep away and now see it as a positive support system get my BFP that will help me rather than an obsession (well, it's that too but hey!). x