TTC Journals

dakini · Nov 30th, 2007, 19:03 PM

Well, just found out that someone I know through another friend just gave birth to their little girl. It's so hard...I am happy for them, but at the same time I feel sad because I'm no closer to having my own little one...especially with not having a temp spike yet! I just have to remember that O could have been pushed back this month and it will happen for us. It really hasn't been that long. Just a little sad and yet happy at the same time...also exhausted today so that just isn't helping.

I'll get a good night's sleep tonight and feel much better about it tomorrow...I wonder if getting less sleep the past few nights has affected O'ing? Maybe that's it. At least on the weekends when I get less sleep before temping I go back to sleep and get the usual amount of sleep...yes, I am going to just think that less sleep combined with my system still getting used to this whole O'ing and ttc thing. yes, that's it.

dakini · Dec 3rd, 2007, 15:53 PM

Well, I think I o'ed on the weekend...temp spiked a few days late. We'll see if it stays high! Just happy that it seems like I will/did o this month...was getting a little afraid I wouldn't.

I have no idea why, and I think it's just because I'm due to test a few days before Christmas and I just really want a BFP for Christmas, but I am feeling hopeful this month. But, may just be wishful thinking. We'll see what happens. If not, then I can have some drinks at Christmas and New Year's.

One of my thoughts this weekend (we had a Christmas party, so temp shifts could also be due to that....

) was that I figured relaxing a little would help, so had a few drinks...and you hear about people that it happens when drunk...not that I was drunk, just tipsy...

I don't know. Just want a BFP and feeling positive today. May change tomorrow if I don't get a lot of sleep!

So that's my update. Nothing that exciting, just wanted to update this. We'll see what happens around Dec 19th/20th...as that's about when I'd be testing...come on

dakini · Dec 5th, 2007, 15:54 PM

Well, this is just odd. Last night I was driving home and it suddenly felt like I had done a few too many situps! And then again this morning...but it's far too early for any symptoms. I'm like 4dpo, possibly 6dpo if you stretch it...and depending on which charting software you look at!

Anyway, trying not to read too much into it, but it does seem odd. Was also exhausted again last night, but I am figuring that's because DH woke me up during the night yesterday with his snoring, wasn't able to get back to sleep until I moved myself, my pillow, a blanket, and the alarm clock to the couch in the basement!

Was up for 30-45 minutes before managing to get back to sleep. Slept much better last night...think I should invest in ear plugs or maybe get that "spare" bedroom cleaned out and put an extra bed in there...just really don't want it to be a "spare" bedroom for long...

Also my temps haven't been as high as they were last month, but seem to have to have stabilized after going up rather than a couple of large spikes...not sure what that means.

Anyway, just wanted to update my journal. Still feeling positive about this cycle, don't know why. Probably will come to nothing.

If no

by about December 17th I am seriously going to consider testing...though I may have to hold out until Saturday the 22nd as I am horrible about being able to not drink and not pee when I am up...during the day I tend to drink about 8 8oz glasses of water, plus a Pepsi (some days 2...

), tea sometimes, skim milk every night...as you can see I go through a lot of liquid during the days and therefore the washroom is my friend.

Anyway, yeah, may have to wait so that I can use FMU on the Saturday...granted, getting a little ahead of myself! It's only December 5th! I have a long way to go until the 17th!

dakini · Dec 6th, 2007, 15:09 PM

Well, still getting that feeling every so often that I've done too many situps. I should add that I haven't done any for a week or so!

Also woke up and stomach wasn't too happy. Not nausea, just didn't like me too much. Seems to be better now that I ate something and had some water. Need to go fill up the water bottle...Also my back is hurting low done. And all of this is dull pain, not sharp.

I know, I know, I said I wasn't going to be reading into anything this time around, and seriously, it's just too early for any symptoms. (Trying to remind myself of this all the time!

) But, I figured I'd write them down so that I don't forget them and if I am pg (again, still feeling positive about this cycle, even though I am tired, and usually when I am really tired like now my outlook goes down the tubes...

) then you can all see what I was feeling, and if I'm not, it's just more things to remember next cycle, and tell my brain - SEE! SEE! It happened last time and you weren't! STOP READING INTO EVERYTHING!

So, yeah, tired, brain not really functioning, so want a Pepsi but it's a little too early for it, don't want tea but might be forced to go get one, stomach muscles protesting for something I haven't done in awhile, and want stomach to figure itself out...I really don't want to have to get out of bed any earlier!

Thanks for just being there to read...don't know if anyone does, but I really don't care.

I just like having a place to write things down and not have to worry about where I put it, or that I didn't write it down in my journal and now have to recopy it...damn, that reminds me, I may want to copy all of these entries into my paper journal...damn.

Ok, going a little crazy

with icons...but they are so cute!

Anyway, later!

TrixieLox · Dec 6th, 2007, 21:50 PM

I'm reading! It is so easy to read symptoms into little twinges but you never know! And I was thinking the same as you yesterday, that if I write down all my symptoms in this journal and I do fall pregnant, I can look back and pass on that knowledge to other girls on this board. Anyway, haven't even got to ovulating yet (only 8 days into cycle) but then I was getting twinges to suggest I was ovulating so who knows? Good luck, keep us updated! x

Tishimouse · Dec 7th, 2007, 11:24 AM

Hi there,

I bet loads of people are reading. I've just read the whole lot and think you're great to be able to jot it all down. It's quite therapeutic to get things off your chest.

So, here's my contribution of magic:

Good luck honey.

dakini · Dec 7th, 2007, 16:49 PM

Ok, only another 9 days or so until I test...I think I will go crazy...

But I can do this. I have to do this. And I still feel good about this cycle...though it will be a long wait. I forgot to add this here earlier, but on 4dpo I had the incredible urge to poas! I was like, give me a break! It's far too early! I thought about it...

...and went,

too early, give it up. And I resisted the urge. Hasn't come back yet and I have felt positive about this cycle since that night. Well, see if anything comes out of positive thinking!

We're having some friends over tomorrow night to watch a movie or two and have dinner, and I am wondering whether I want to have a drink or two...and tonight is my company Christmas party and wondering the same thing...Just not sure I feel like it...I know that your blood doesn't get passed to baby until like 4-6 weeks (can't remember which) and quite frankly, if I am pg, then I'd had a few before the

when we'd have most likely conceived...and I know DH isn't adverse to me having a couple...not getting totally blasted, but a few. At least until it's comes back BFP! Just not sure I know what I want to do...I guess we'll wait and see what I feel like tonight and tomorrow...

And thanks for the replies TrixieLox and Tishimouse. I figured someone was reading this journal as I read everyone else's myself...

...but it's nice to know someone else is too!

And yeah, using this as more of a record of my journey, and one of these days I have to rewrite into my paper journal...some days I am wanting to write electronically and some days paper...but I have to catch up the paper one. That one I will have longer than an electronic one...

So I noticed in an earlier post I was going to wait until Dec 20th or so to test...looking at my chart again, unless my charting software changes my O date (had a temp spike yesterday again...very odd...) I will test the 16th if there's no temp drop. Saying that, if it's a BFN I will test again on the the 22nd if there's still no temp drop. If it's not a BFP then, then I have a problem! At least I already have a doc appointment scheduled for Jan 2nd...not that I really want to go because it's that damned annual appointment...

Wow, this has gotten very long...

On that note, I guess I will go for today...though I should say that those dull feelings of doing too many situps seem to have gone away today...but I am gassy and um, looser than normal

for the past few days (I know, tmi!). Tired too; not exhausted, but still tired when getting out of bed...hard to tell if it's more that I went to bed late last night...why oh why does it seem like DH wants

more after I o?

Not that he didn't before...it just seems like his timing is a little off as we're supposed to be more irresistible during O I thought...

That's ok, the more practice the better in my books! (Except when it keeps me up far too late into the night - as I've said before, not a night hawk!) So I could be tired from being up late last night

or another reason...but it's not that overwhelming exhaustion that others have talked about...more that I feel tired mentally, physically, but not emotionally (if that makes any to anyone!

And yesterday and today I was walking up the stairs with my backpack (which is too heavy, and I have to really change that) and everything I normally have, no extra weight really...nope, wait, had an extra binder...maybe that did it..

nevermind. Losing mind.

Ok, after an e-x-t-r-e-m-e-l-y long post, I am signing off now. Later y'all!

And of course now about an hour after I am done this thread I start getting those tugging/nagging dull pains on my left side...maybe O due to that temp spike 2 days ago? Very confused...

Oh well. We'll see. May I am O'ing later...or as was suggested to someone else on here...O'ing twice in a cycle...if I am I hope there's not twins if I am/get pg...

Nah, never happen to me...

I have to figure out how to look after one...plus my DH!

dakini · Dec 10th, 2007, 15:53 PM

It's probably because I had to be up so dang early today, but I have a headache and I am very tired. Brain is very loopy today too. And my stomach didn't really like the V8 juice I had this morning...But again, having to get up about 2 hours earlier than usual will do that to a person! (Damn meetings, at least they are only once a month...)

So, an update on me. My temps were very wonky this weekend, but I think that's because I didn't sleep well Saturday or Sunday and was up super early today. I had a few drinks both Friday and Saturday nights...if I am pg, I won't feel bad about it - no blood is moving between us yet. And I got so stuffed up both nights...I think I have to swear off booze anyway...in order to get to sleep I have to have either Advil Cold & Sinus or Graval...and then I don't sleep well and I'm cranky...don't think it's really worth it.

And I don't know if it's from the not working out a lot lately, or the drinking on the weekend, but I feel so bloated! I feel like my tummy has grown in the past few days/week. Very odd. But I'm sure it has more to do with not working out than a pg symptom!

I am still getting those pinching/pulling sensations, and it still feels, on and off, like I've done too many situps. But, I am sure it's just wishful thinking. Last month I read far too much into everything and nope,

showed up. So I am just going to wait and see what happens next weekend. Although my bbs seem a little bigger too...but again...probably because I haven't worked out lately!

May update later today...depending on how brain working....

dakini · Dec 11th, 2007, 15:13 PM

I so wish there was a "I'm currently feeling: Ugh" at the top of screen...it would so just describe me today!

Worked out last night with weights and our bike (it's been awhile since I've lifted weights and I really have to start again as I am sooo out of shape, though I have been using the bike whenever I can) and today I just feel ugh. I tried to take it easy and only use light weights and as soon as I got tired (earlier than usual, but again, haven't lifted weights in awhile, though usually I can lift more reps than I did last night even after a break like I've taken...anyway...) I stopped that set. My back is sore, still felt like I did too many situps (didn't go any!), and I have a headache today...also been getting some more pinches/pulls in my lower abs. Also still tired, though I went to bed at a reasonable time...feel weak today and I have been gassy (burping and uhh..yeah) and a couple of times when I've burped I tasted - well, yuck comes to mind! - and nauseous a little now...felt that way when I didn't eat right away this morning...but, again, I can't read into this in any way! I did that last month and it was nothing...this is nothing until my temps stay up longer than 15 days...and only something when a test comes back bfp....I still so want that for Christmas. And every time I think, nah, it's realyl nothing, a little voice in the back of my head goes, well, I still feel good about this month...so odd.

Anyway, rambling nicely. Brain just gone today. Truly. So odd. Not usually this loopy...

Okay, running off now. Later everyone!

dakini · Dec 11th, 2007, 18:41 PM

ugh. That's about all I can say. (I wish I could have updated the pp, but oh well)

I am so nauseated right now...after I ate lunch it just hit me really bad. As did a very bad headache. I'd almost say I had a migraine...this just sucks. And I still feel so bloated. Kill me now.

I have so much to do at work and all I really want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep. Not going to happen; I also have dinner plans tonight so it's really not going to happen! At least when I get home I can have a nice long relaxing bath so I am looking forward to this.

I just hope that this actually means something, and something other than I am getting sick! Ugh. Peppermints here we come!

TTC Journals

Dakini's TTC Journal

Trying To Conceive

Woohoo!

Very odd...

Ugh...

The 2ww is KILLING me...

Ugh...so tired and blah!

11DPO and ugh

update - 11dpo