Well, thought I might as well write it down, so here goes.

The short version of my life story for those of you who don't know me!

At the age of 22 I was running a pub in Telford. Met a guy and we had a good 6 weeks together, then the company I was working for went bust, so overnight I lost my job and home. Had no choice but to go cap in hand back to my parents (had left home at 16!). Me and this guy decided it had been a good 6 weeks, but nothing more, so parted. Anyway, a few weeks later, AF arrived, then next time, no AF. Strange as I hadn't slept with anyone. But took a test anyway - BFN. This went on for weeks. Finally I went doctors and he did a blood test and confirmed I was pg! He booked me in for a scan 2 days later and they told me I was 14 weeks! Shocked is an understatement. Anyway, after a lot of soulsearching, as I had never been maternal and was always adamant I didn't want kids, I decided that fate was trying to tell me something, and decided to go ahead and be a single mum. At 7 months, I decided it was only fair to tell the father. It was the first time I had spoken to him since we split, and he went straight to the train station and was with me 3 hours later! 2 months later, Kayleigh was born, then we married when she was 11 months. Split when she was 3! Don't ever try and base a lifetime on a 6 week relationship, that's what I've learnt.

I was then introduced to another man by a friend of mine, and 5 years later, yep, another split.

Then in 2004, I met what I thought was the man if my dreams. He was so wonderful to both me and Kayleigh and promised us the Earth. A couple of months later, I found out he'd been sleeping with his ex! My world fell apart.We'd not been together long, but I was so in love with him and just couldn't understand why he didn't love me back. I spent weeks crying to the Streets song - Dry your eyes babe!

Then he started sniffing around again and telling me he'd made a mistake and wanted me back. But he was still with her! Don't ask me what happened, but something clicked, they say theres a fine line between love and hate. I wanted to hurt him badly, and I wanted some fun with it! At the time, he was renting a room from another guy who worked behind the bar in the pub. He'd got a bit of a reputation for being a male-slag and (from what my 2 best friends told me from experience!) would keep me up all night and I'd have a smile on my face for days, and then he'd walk away and want nothing more. Perfect! I could get my revenge and have loads of fun!!Let's just say that this guy didn't take a lot of persuasion!!!!

Well, it started off as rebound sex, but 11 months later I married him!!!He's almost 11 years younger than me, but we are perfect together, and I love him to bits.

So we started ttc when we came back from honeymoon in July, and I got my BFP on New Years Day 2006! Charles was born by c section 31st August.

I had acute SPD through the pregnancy, so decided that we would start ttc again straight away so I could get it out of the way and then concentrate on having fun with the kids. That was 13 months ago, and still nothing.

I've tried the 'relax, don't count days and it'll happen' method. Tried the '48 hourly' method, and nothing. So this month is the 'at it like bunnies' method!

I normally O on day 18, but last month was day 14 for some reason.

So, CD11 today, and we managed a quickie yesterday morning, and then again at bedtime.

So, here we go, the week starts here.

first lot of baby dust for your journal!!! i wish you lots of luck hun

Hi Amanda,
for u..
Hope u get ur BFP soon !!

For some reason, we are both feeling really optimistic about this month. I don't know why this one is different to the last 13, but it just feels it. Normally DH doesn't even want to talk about it, but this afternoon we had a really good talk about it after BDing while I was laying there with my bum propped up on a pillow for 20 minutes!!!

So far:
CD10 BD morning and night
CD11 BD night
CD12 BD afternoon and still to go tonight!!

One of those beauties has got to get through!!!!!!

good luck hun

Aww good luck babe you have had a right old time getting to where you are now

So we BD at night on CD 12 as well.

Doing well so far!

But now it seems like this cold that's been lurking for the past month may be on it's way.I feel like crap. I'm off to bed now, but have told DH to wake me when he comes up. Gotta be done!

When do you usually ovulate Amanda?

Well, seems like it's possibly going to be the same as last month. Normally O on day 18, but today is day 14 and I've got that tell-tale pain in my lower right side.

Thing is that by the time DH came to bed last night, I felt like crap and just didn't have the energy.

Today's a no no until tonight as well. Bloody typical! Normally I finish work at 1pm, DH finishes at 2.30pm, so we can get a quickie in before Kayleigh gets home from school, but I've got to go and pick my neighbours kids up from school at 3pm, so have to leave the house the minute DH walks through the door!Then she's not getting back till 5pm, and Kayleigh will be home by then. She's grounded, so we're stuck till tonight.

Well, I've come down with the dreaded cold, and feel like shit.

But, I'm sitting here pretending to be okay so hubbie will want to come near me later!!! All I want to do is curl up in bed and sleep, but I'm going to force myself to do it!!!