soup

sorry need to rant!!! went to docs today as am now nearly 4 weeks past ovulation, have had numerous bfn's and wanted to know what was going on.

he looked at me like i was mad, as i have always had irregular periods, so i said that about how i thought the luteal phase was always 2 weeks. he was like oh no thats in the middle of your cycle and your fertile from the beginning of that to your period!!!!

didn't want to know anything about my tests, just said come back in a year but thought all would be fine just have lots of sex! oh yeah to trust anything of ebay esp hpt's

have never been to this doctors surgery before as never needed to since we moved, came out feeling really down. i just want my period now so we can have another shot!

csmummu

awww soup im sorry drs shouldnt be little people i cried after coming out of a drs once for feeling depressed!!! needless to say i never went back!

Hope you get AF soon xxxx

Erised

aww hon, don't let the GP get you down. He's obviously well out of order and should not be taken too seriously. You have every right to be worried and go see him, it's what he's there for! If things don't sort themselves out soon and you stay worried go back and ask to see a different doctor at your surgery. If there's no one else just go see him again and tell him you want an explanation as to why you should come back in a year and you'd like it fully explained to you what you should be looking for and how to try to get pregnant etc. I know you're probably aware, but hopefully that way you can get him talking and point out where your problems lay. Don't let him bully you away!

Another option would be a family planning centre, they should be able to help you figure out what's going on with your cycle. And if they believe it's best to go see a GP you can at least tell him you've been referred by someone who knows what they're talking about.

I dread going to see a GP for pregnancy in England tbh. Here you have about 7 doctors in 1 surgery, of whom I know no one. Last time I went the silly woman diagnosed an abscess that could have paralysed me as a pulled muscle. I ended up in hospital later that night. In Holland (where I'm from) we have 1 GP from when he starts until he retires, mine knows all my medical information by heart and knows me by first name. When I go to see him he does his consultancy in English so my British husband can follow everything. Hopefully you'll be able to find someone like him =)

WILSMUM

I'm sorry for yr bad experience soup its not nice when you go to the doctors hoping for some answers and then get nothing!!!
I had a bad experience tuesday - DH and I have been ttc since Dec and on seeing a previous doctor for a blood test a couple of months ago she said we could have test etc because I'm over 30 and we've been trying for over 6 months - well when we went we saw a different doctor who was very patronising and said we could get DHs sperm tested but that would be it until we'd been trying for a year and then when she found out we'd only been together since October and married since March well that was it we were kinda rushed out of the consultation after that because she was judging us and disapproved!!!
However she did phone DH yesterday with details of where he needs to go to do his sperm test etc and she did then apologise on the phone for judging us and said she is just rather old fashioned at times!!!

If I was you I would make another appointment but ask to see another doctor - mayb a female doctor may be more understanding - good luck xXx

Loo

Iagree that it is upsetting when you go to the doctors and they don't offer what you were hoping for. It sounds like you have all had a bad experience.

The problem they have is that amenorrhoea (ie the lack of a period) is not usually investigated until you haven't had one for 6 months (unless an obvious cause e.g. pregnancy!). (Some do say 3 months). So although we are all worried after it doesn't appear for a couple of days/weeks etc....the docs won't feel our angst until quite a bit later!

And for infertility in general - there has been a recent research article in the BMJ which looked at women trying for 2 years with no success and no obvious cause (i.e. 'unexplained infertility'). They randomly allocated couples to 3 groups for 6 months - trying on their own, clomid and IUI. Turns out that IUI and clomid didn't offer any substantial benefit over trying on their own!!! In fact the clomid ones did the worst. But the trying alone ones were the least satisfied with the treatment...
http://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/full/337/aug07_2/a716?maxtoshow=&HITS=10&hits=10&RESULTFORMAT=&fulltext=infertility+clomiphene+iui&searchid=1&FIRSTIN DEX=0&resourcetype=HWCIT

So really, the medics can't win. If there is nothing obvious to cause the problem (so admittedly tests are needed to ascertain that), then we are possibly best off being left alone for even longer. But if they do that, we don't like it, cos we feel nothing is being done!

I don't mean this to sound like a lecture or that I don't think you have had bad experiences, so I hope it hasnt come across that way. Just thought you might want to see some of the evidence behind why they don't seem too bothered.

Good luck ladies x

saraendepity

aw hun i'm so sorry you had such a bad time with your doc, go back and demand another doc this time n then explain whats going on n how the other doc treated you - hopefully you will get somewhere with another doc... lots of coming your way

sara

xxxxxxxxx

soup

to be honest i didn't feel like he treated me badly, he was really nice, what bothered me more was his lack of knowledge, he obviously had no clue about luteal phases and a few other bits i thought im sure thats not right. i was more cross with myself for not questioning it. came home and looked it all up again just to make sure i hadn't got my wires crossed. he also reckoned you could get a bfp on home tests less than 48 hrs after sex!

feeling much more positive this morning, had a good chat with hubby and have agreed to just relax about it all for a little while, still work out when im ovulating but not get too hung up about it.

Loo

Dont be cross with yourself! Its hard to question someone who is supposed to know their stuff. Sounds like he came out with a load of old cobblers!

I think female GPs get to see more 'girly problems' and are therefore often a little more clued up (no offence to any male docs!!) on cycles, fertility, contraception etc.

Think we are little mini experts on periods and hormones and ttc with all the research we do!!

Good luck with your relaxed trying x

Sinead

I was gonna say the same as loo - try a female doc - I have the choice of 4 dr's at my surgery, 3 males, 1 female. As I don't particularly likr the female I tend not to go to her, but with fertility issues she was the one I chose and has been great

browneyedshorty81

Yeah doctors can be jerks... I had a fight with mine last friday.. long story but good luck!