Tam

HELLO...

Well, I never expected to be in here, and tbh I have no idea whether I should be but I didn't know where else to post it.

I am absolutely loving having Alfie and our little family extending.......and I don't want to be too much older by the time we have completed our family, so one half of me really wants to jump back on the wagon and try again, then have a rest for a year or 2, but then there is the other half of me that wants to make sure I get plenty of time with Alfie and he gets all the attention he deserves......I am so confused and have no idea what to do!

Also before I got PG I was just getting over an accident I had the previous year and now with the SPD and lack of exercise I have done during my pregnancy with Alfie I feel I should maybe get fitter before trying again as I have been immobile for the best part of a year and a half and have gained weight in that time, then the pregnancy on top too

Well we have BD at the start of what could possibly be the start of my fertile time (so we were told) but I am not planning to do anymore BD, I think if we have caught (having no idea if I would have truley been fertile myself) then brilliant, my mind is made up, if not then maybe I should lay off a bit to get fit?

I just needed to air that and get it off my chest......see Paul was adomant he didn't want us trying for 2-3 yrs due to mt SPD and the physio's advice on it, but I have won him over as there was no way I was waiting that long, I would llike another as soon as possible!

So we can TTC again as soon as I am happy, I just have to get my head sorted and listen to my head rather than my heart I think, or do I ERGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!

HELPPPPPPP Any thoughts on it?....I know it is a personal decision, but what are your thoughts, tbh I would fall again tomorrow, but I am not sure if that would be ideal physically rather than anything else :S

Imi

I fell PG VERY quick ... and i had the PG from HELL with maddie, this one not been great but i know it will all be worth it in the end.
Like you said hun it is personal choice but im glad because i think it will be nice for the kids to grow up together close in age.
I decided i didn't want to get fit and lose all my baby flab just to put it all back on again when i had another so it has worked out quite nicely really!
It's up to you what you do hun as you and only you will know if and when you are ready ...
Best wishes and good luck!
Imi
xxx

LynnieH

Definately a personal choice. Because i was going back to work fultime and the cost of child care I decided to wait until Jonny was in school bfore i had my second. If I wasn't working i would have had them closer together. I think it's a case of how you feel about it. You will have time to enjoy each other once the littlies have gone and you won't be old grandparents!

Cat

TBH after the problems I had with my last PG with Noah with him damaging my tailbone and the spinal headache, Iwas told to wait a couple of years (which I havent) and Ihavent found these things have caused me any problems at all. IHad the attitude of not wanting to work my arse of trying to get back in shape, if Iwas only going to get PG again a year later. I wanted to get the first 2 out of the way close together. Personally I have liked leaving a short gap between, and I have always had this in mind when bringing up Noah, making sure he can be independent and able to amuse himself instead of spoiling him so he doesnt notice a sudden change in attention when the new baby arrives. Its generally advised that its best to have either a gapo of less than 18 months or over 4 years, that way they are to young to get jelous, or old enought to be more involved in the care of their sibling. So Idont think you need to feel bad about wether it will deflect attention from Alfie, as he would be likly to take it better at a young age then when he is terrible two's and getting Jelous. Its more a question of how you feel physically and if you feel you can go through it again just yet.

Trinity

I agree with Imi that maybe it will be best to have another and then try to get back in shape after .. then you wont have to do it twice .. lol

I personally want to have my children close together coz me and my brother were very close in age and we have always been really close. Think it must have been because we were at the same stages at the same time.

Again though it is a personal decision but think you really do have to weight up the physical aspect of it too.

Good luck hun, whatever you decide to do.

xxx

KX

Close together Tam, go for it!xx

Suz

I have never been pregnant so I may not be the best advice giver for this, but I think I would atleast wait 6 months maybe even a year. Give your body a chance to recover and spend some time with Alfie! But Im sure that what ever the choice is that you make, the ending will be the same....Another bundle of joy!

Wobbles

I agree with Suz - Like her we speak a lot an my thoughts come soley from that! I personally think from our friendship you need a break Tam! Sorry x

bexxie

Tam

I agree with Suz and Wobbs (and this is for a physical reason as well as emotional) I think given your age you can easily afford to give a years break between Alfie and the next. I think it will do you good in so mnay ways to take this break.

You are not old hun you in the prime right now of your life.

You think I am 31/32 this year and me and Dave said if this goes well and not too hard then we will have another 7 year age gap! Can you believe that and that is with knowing I will have to go through Amnio etc but hopefully no other probs like this pregnancy.

Only YOU know the answer to what you have asked above,I think deep-down it is there in your gut and just follow that sweetie,if you have 'caught' this month then hey! It's meant to be,if not then you can then take the option 2 or try again.

Whatever you decide hunnie it will be for the right reason. I think you shoudl listen to what your lovely fella says he knows better than anyone and is one in a million that bloke!

You take care and dont worry.

bex

Layla

i think you should go ahead and try now then get it after, i persoanly think there isnt much point in getting fit, then loseing all your hard work to a pregnancy.

Its your choice and you have to do what you feel is best.

xx