TrixieLox

Sorry to those of you who have endured me moaning about this sitch before but it just won't go away. They haven't got kids so don't have a clue what it's like to TTC. She reckons she would never ever allow it to stop her going to her brother's wedding (her exact words today). Well, I'd never ever have had a wedding abroad cos I wanted all my family and mates there so ...

Just did a post on a wedding forum I once used about this and loads of girls said I shouldn't feel bad (and these are all gals about to get married themselves) so am feeling a bit better.

We've made this decision, we need to stick to it, we can't allow people to make us feel guilty and when we get our BFP, we won't care one iota for it all :-) They can bloody well leave us alone and stop making us feel bad, we have a baby to create! xx

porkpie1981

exactly

Kerryanne

Firstly your brother and sis-in-law, are following you dreams why can't you.

I think they are well bang out of order, THEY choosed to get married abroad, why should they expect people to try and make it, at the end off the day most people who marry abroad very few people can make it, due to pregnancy, money issues etc and they all expect that. Everyone knows this.

A baby is a great thing, and they are moaning about "incase" your pregnant because then you can't come too there wedding, i think you getting pregnant is more important than there wedding, babys usually brings a family together.

I don't think you have anything to feel bad about, they should feel bad for saying those things too you

polo_princess

Couldnt of said it better myself sweetie, im 100% behind you on continuing to TTC. If it were the boot on the other foot i know you would say to your brother to carry on TTC knowing how much it means

miel

you should reverse the situation on them and say ... imagine i will ask you to not get married because my due date is suppose to be exactly the same date as your wedding so i want my girly freind with me and my brother...
what she will do canceled one of the most important event of her life because of you ? certainly not!
so you it's the same you are trying to make a baby and it's one of the most important part of you life right now ...they should both understand !!!

elm

I feel that you're making the right decision 100%, I can see that they'd like you to be at the wedding but I think they're being completely unreasonable to ask to to stop TTC. I agree with Schmelly about the letter, they seem a tad blinkered in their approach to it x

wishes

You cant fly... they can choose to have their wedding here instead. Nuff said.

TrixieLox

Ah gals, you're all so fab! It's obvious we shouldn't feel guilty about this, 98% of the people I mention this sitch to say they're being a tad out of order, making us feel bad about wanting to continue TTCing.

The thing they keep going on about is that we initially said we would stop, and up until we made our decision, we were going on about how fab it'll be (but deep down, we were both thinking 'shit, we really don't wanna stop trying'). Yeh, I wish we'd not said we'd stop in the New Year but back then, we didn't realise it'd take us this long. I DON'T want to JUSTIFY myself. I've had enough of the pressure. We have the complete perogative to change our minds about something so so so so important to us.

From now, if they bring it up, I'm gonna say 'look, please stop making me feel guilty for wanting a baby. Just leave me be and leave this to fate.' x

(have lunch for my mum's bday tomorrow and they're there so that'll be FUN!). x

shimmyshimmy

First of all, you live one time.
It is completely up to you and your hubby when you decide to try to conceive a baby.
If the time is right for you then having a break shouldnt be an option, and your Brother should understand that. Why should you put your life on hold for a wedding, especially one, which is abroad, why should you have to travel for the wedding anyway. If he wanted everyone to attend easily then he should have had his wedding in the local registry office or church, and keep it simple.

You do what is right for you,

end of,

Shim,
xxx
Weddings are so overhyped anyway.

Freya

sod 'em! How very rude of them, they have NO idea how you and OH feel!

Have no guilt about it... just you get on and have some baby fun!

xxx