Loula

Not at all. I would be completely insulted tbh ( mind you am not religious so that would insult me for another reason too!! )

I think that some people just should think about how what they say might affect you before they say it. They do mean well, and I know it's hard unless you have been in this situation, but still, have a bit of tact please!

CurlySue

Every time I visit my mother she asks "When are you going to make me a grandmother? Haven't i been waiting long enough?"

Its as if the past God knows how many months (and going on time off the pill, years) have been a purposefully thought out punishment to her. Its not like we are taking our time intentionally!!!

genkigemini

I have literally had someone tell me, "Well, try harder" and "Tell your husband to do his job." WTF?!

You'd swear people thought I hadn't gotten knocked up yet for attention or something.

Schmelly

Of course you're not ungrateful. It hurts that you're still ttc and although comments like that are well-meant, they don't help at all...just make you feel worse. It's the same when someone dies and people try to console you by telling you that God took them away because they were needed for some other purpose. The pain is still there so comments like that just make you mad at God, if anything!

I'm not religious myself, but I think you should have your own ideas about how your God looks after you, and try to let other people's comments wash over you (easier said than done, I know). Your mum is probably trying to make herself feel better too, and maybe these thoughts help her. She just doesn't want to see her little girl suffering and wants to take your pain away.

Lazy Leo

Sometimes I think you have to say something very simple but in a very calm manner to get through to people. Like, "it might be God's will, but do you know what, right now that doesn't really help much". Then turn round and walk away. When/if the person tries to continue the conversation or even apologise tell them no, you don't want to talk about it and move onto something completely banal and pointless like the shape of the clouds in the sky.

I found things like that usually stopped the comments. Tell them the doctors have told you you can't have kids and that your unsuitable for IVF (if your not too superstitious about tempting fate). It would soon stop the 'when are you....' questions.

Hope you all find your own ways of dealing with (sometimes) well meaning individuals who only make things more difficult.

I'm still fending off questions and as I know I am expecting now that's a different side to the same coin. I thought I'd escaped it!