maddiwatts19

I'm not sure what it is, but now i'm having doubts & think maybe we should hold off TTC....

I've read alot of posts on here that people have said to & about young girls who are TTC, about school &money and that..

I'm 19 and next week i finish my first year of uni. When i found out i was pregnant, an told the uni, they were fantastic, and wanted to help in anyway they could. We have a lot of mature students and students who are parents at my uni, and there are special childcare facilites and everything..theres the normal nursery for older kids, but then theres a special unit for little babies...When i said i was pregnat, the uni said if the baby was due in term time, i could have as long off as i needed. and my course isnt that strenuous, i only go in 3 days a week, and its not all day or anything, just a few hours. We had a plan that for the first few months, we would leave baby with my OH's mum who lives near when i was at uni, and then when i felt ready and baby was old enough, i could take her with me to the nursery. And my OH's mum said she'd still love to do this, after we told her we were TTC.
But now having read some things people have said, i'm thinking maybe we should wait till i finish uni...i'll be done by May 2010. And the things i'm talking about are all really good points!! So its got me confused!!

I know i'm ready to be a mum, and my OH wants to be a dad, we became so attached to bubs when i was pregnant, and was so happy that everything would still work out!! We know that we want a baby and to complete our own family...

Please ladies, i need your input...would it be better to wait till after i finish uni?? i'm really torn because i know we want this so badly!

So should we wait, or am i just still being a silly hormonal cow???lol

Thank you in advance...i know your always good with advice!!
xx

wishes

Oh hun, only you can know whats best for you (and i know thats prob not want you want to hear, sorry)

Waiting till after uni would of course make sense if you're using your head. Career on path, money coming in, blah blah.... but sometimes we need to listen to what our heart says instead.

You had already made all the plans and imaigined your lives as mummy and daddy... someitmes its not so easy to just put those plans away for a few years. I'm not sure i could.

Its such a big descision hun... I think deep down you probably both already know what you want to do.

maddiwatts19

Thanks hun! Its ok, i understand that unfortunately no-one can make this decision for me!!
I know the career thing makes sense, but my OH has a good income, and we both know we're ready, and that we are going to be together forever...but maybe waiting would be sensible...
Oh i just dont know.....!!! Stupid hormones!!!
Thanks again Wishes...xx

wishes

In a way it might make sense to go for it now?.... if you can get through uni it means that theres no distruption to your income like if you were working and had to take time off? Good luck deciding.

lousielou

I'm more than aware that I may come under fire here for saying this, but I really think you should go for it. Some women feel broody at 30, some at 25, some at 19, - we are all different! If your body (and head!) is telling you to have a baby, why should age stand in the way? Xx

BeckyBoo

Hun, theres a huge difference between ttc at 16 and ttc at 19. You're only asking granny to babysit while you're at uni, you're not asking her to support your child. Only know what is right for you and right for your child.

Also you're making an effort to better yourself finacially by going to uni etc.

Coral

Oh hun its so difficult to comment, as really only you know whats right. I can only talk about me, I wanted a career, in order to have a great life later on with my DH - we worked our socks off and now have been able to move to France and take some time off to renovate our house!

Im 34 (hubby is 40) and I only decided recently I was finally ready for such a huge commitment, and am now so ready for motherhood, it wasnt that I wasnt mentally ready before, but there were other things that I wanted to do - and I wanted to have a career for a few years also!

If I was you I would finish Uni and work for a couple of years, at least to give yourself a good CV and some work history (especially as you are working so hard at Uni). By doing this you can return to work after having a baby if you choose to.

At the end of the day though the decision is yours..........

maddiwatts19

Thanks girls!! You all make such good points!!! Which has just confused me more!! Hehe!...
I think a chat with the OH is in order...its up to him too..
I think i know how i feel...and i'm just being silly and hormonal!
Thank you again!!
xxxxx

tansey

Good luck with whatever you decide - normally i'd encourage ladies to live life a little but if i'd have met Mr Right when I was your age and was secure and had a good plan like you, who knows, maybe I wouldn't have waited until now! xx

Lazy Leo

Hi hun,

I've given this advice to plenty of friends and to people on this site because I find it usually works for me. Basically your head is telling you one thing and your heart is telling you another but if you really listen to your emotions one of them will be slightly stronger than the other. You really need to look at hard at each instinct but if you do then one will be stronger - go with that hun. Listen really hard to and trust your own instincts. Good luck with whatever you decide xxxx