So ladies, I have a big family do to attend tomorrow and I need some suggestions of how I can answer the inevitable 'any news yet?' question with wit, grace and intelligence (while drunk on Lambrusco).

The party will be attended by a) several fabulously fertile cousins and wives of cousins who fall pregnant when the word 'sperm' is mentioned, b) my nan who told me the last time I saw her 'I will die happy if I can see you have a child, darling', c) my dad (and father of my 2-month old half sister) who said to me last year: 'why aren't you pregnant yet? Don't you and the hubby have sex?', and d) several gorgeous (and lovely) size 0 aunts who will pat my belly and say 'any news?' ('no, that'll be the fourth cream cake I just ate, skeletor!')

So I predict, alongside 'is that your TENTH glass of wine Trixie? And is that CHOCOLATE in your hair?', I will be bombarded with questions (much like a machine gun) that go along the lines of 'when will we hear the pittar patter of tiny feet in the Trixie household?'.

So, how shall I answer the inevitable questions my lovelies? Answers on a postcard! x

I'm guessing "back off and mind your own business" would be considered a bit rude??!! Then again, so are those kinds of questions!

oh no.. that sounds awful...

i think i'd be tempted to tell them to p*ss off, but maybe thats just me?

its a bit of a personal thing to ask really isn't it? Tell them you aren't comfortable discussing it in such a public place?

good luck luv!

i would just say wait and see, or you never know what is round the corner and then wink and walk away smiling then they will be like wot and it will keep them guessing lol

Uuurrrggghhh - I hate those family gatherings.

Especially the ones when the uncle that you see twice a year wants to know when you're going to add to the family so that they have someone to coo over cos they see you all the time - NOT!!!

I don't know the best way to handle this one. Last time he asked I said when my mother in law retires so she can babysit and I can go back to work, knowing that she doesn't want to retire yet. I have also passed comment within earshot that it would be all the same if we were trying and I was unable to conceive - that seemed to stop the questions - for now anyhow.

Neither my family nor my husband's know that we are trying and having problems, so its easy for us to just say we're too busy with work.

Don't know if any of this helps. It's a hateful situation. Good luck for tomorrow.

Thanks gals. Thing is, while drunk (again! Honest, I don't have a drink problem!), I did tell a load of my family in an excited manner that we had started trying back in Nov. 6 months later, no news and the questions will be there.

I like the suggestion Babe2000 made ... ;-)

Or I could tell the truth - 'I'll let you know if the pre-seed works tonight'. Ha ha! Or I could make them feel like shit and lie (I hope) and say 'actually, I'm infertile but thanks for asking'. My mate says I should say I'm too happy having fun with my friends, writing, going on holidays and drinking so I've decided to put the TTcing on hold.


Any more funny suggestions? xx

just say you like the practice of baby making so much / BD sex you are rather happy you are not preggo yet and when you are PG ...you will probably sale the tapes on the net it will be extra money when the baby arrive...

mmm? may be i should do that myself...

but in the more serious note, my family back in France always asking me too ...i just said it's taking a little longer from what we were expected but we are working on it and we will let them know when it will happen...

OMG babe I don't know...this is why i have to resist telling anyone, i couldn't face a situation like yours.
Maybe change the subject wildly, when asked 'so, any news on the baby front?', just say 'the sun and moon pyramids were hard to climb as there are no hand rails' or when told 'shouldn't you be PG by now' just say 'I'll be watching the track events in London'

Aww hun that sounds like a scene out of a film! Poor you! If the way they ask you is in that around about kind of question you said "any news" I would just either tell them some other news you've got and do it in an animated way so that the conversation moves quickly, or take the opposite tack and bluntly ask them "about what?" and see if they have the guts to mention the P word! Those parties are a nightmare sometimes. If everyone's expecting you to be expecting I would be tempted to turn up with a cushion shoved up my jumper... Hope it goes well for you - let us know how you did! xxx

I'm still laughing!!! SKELATOR!!! LOL
Okay, I too used to get these types of questions. After a while I just told people that we were doing so well with careers and life... that we were putting TTC on hold. People stopped asking.
However, it would be much more entertaining for you to make an announcement with a glass of wine in your hand... "OKAY EVERYONE, JUST SO YOU ALL KNOW WE ARE NOT PG YET!!! WE WILL BE SENDING OUT ANNOUCMENTS AT THE APPROPRIATE TIME, WHEN THERE IS A PREGNANCY TO ANNOUNCE !! THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR TIME AND CONCERN!!" Remember to stager a little. Done. People would def. steer clear of you all night. LOL
Good luck and try to stay positive... even after being harassed this weekend.
P