AF is on its way! I can feel it! I'm around on CD 28 and I feel crampy and period like! Just thought I would share! I hope everyone else gets the BFP's but I'm pretty sure I'm out for the month! And I am about to just plane old just not give a damn! Maybe I'm not meant to have a 2nd! I am thankful for my first and am trying to concentrate on that right now but its hard!

I have gotten rid of all of my 1sts baby clothes and last summer I went around collecting Baby things from the 2nd hand store (they can't sell big items so I tried to get as many as I could I had a crib, swing, car seat, etc.) so now I have also gotten rid of everything except for the car seat and a brand new tummy time mat! I am thinking I need to throw both of them away they are bothering me and I can't get them out of my head! Might also be because the car seat is currently residing on my front porch! But I am thinking tomorrow I need to make a trip to the 2nd hand store and take both of the items in!

I give up! I completely give up! I don't have the strength to go on! I can't! This is affecting everything in my life from the time I wake up in the morning till I go to sleep and everything in between! I was so preoccupied with it that I wasn't doing my school work and had to drop one of my classes (ya i'm a 22 yr old that enjoys taking 2-3 classes a semester or I was) because i knew it was never going to get done!

None of my family understands except for my hubby's Aunt (she tried for 13 months to conceive 12 yrs ago b4 conceiving her 2nd daughter). My mom thinks I might have gone off my rocker. Which she doesn't say out loud but she doesn't like it when i talk about ttc.

My best friend in the whole wide world and I started ttc the same month and she is now 5 months pregnant and I get to hear about her growing belly and nausea (not that I can criticize her for talking about it but it doesn't make it any less hard). She is on her 3rd! HER 3RD! We both were born April 2nd 1987 less than 100 miles away from each other! We have known each other since we were 14! Our first borns are only 2 months apart!

My husband tries to understand but in all honesty I really don't think he does! He isn't the one who feels like her body is letting her down every month! That has to endure Periods that are amplified 10x because of the stress and depression!

Nothing about this makes sense! I always said I would never have an only child until I had my first then I swore I wouldn't have another one but then 2 yrs ago I decided I wanted what I had always wanted! I want my son to have a sibling! It is so lonely growing up as an only child! I guess I had it way worse than my son but isn't that's what we are suppose to do? Improve our children's lives a little more than ours were?

I have things that I can't even tell my mom because it would kill her to know! I hope to GOD that my son never has to keep the kind of secret I've been carrying around for the past 14 yrs! When I was 8 my step brother forced me to give him oral sex and more but I have pretty much mentally blocked every thing but a piece or 2 of it!

WOW I really can get off subject! Bravo if you made it to the end of this! Thanks for reading and giving me a sympathetic ear!

to you all!

sorry to here that purechaos dont give up hope never give up hope though I have the feeling of AF when you really have hopes that this month is the month can I ask how long you have been trying for #2? if you managed a #1 then you sure are not out for not being able to have a #2 stay positive! I know how you feel about not being able to do class work I am in the proccess of getting my qualifications for university im hoping the baby will hurry up as I have to accept of decline my university offer by June all this month baby this and baby that is all that is on my mind im sure my partner is sick of me talking about it now i am behind on my work because of thinking about it so I know where your coming from I am so so sorry to hear about what your uncle did I am in a simular boat when I was 15 I was locked in a room by 5 guys who came in 1 by 1 and forced the same act upon me although my mum knows and it brokw her heart when I told her I dropped the case as I was scared for my own family because the guys who did it were in my eyes dangerous people and could be capable of anything so if you would like to talk I can give you my email and we can help each other just dont give up!!! baby dust to you also I am 20 so around same age as you (almost)

The First of April will be 11 months! I've been through 11 cycles! I just spent the last hour crying to DH and he really doesn't get it!

I was on the Depo for 3 years! I blame myself for putting that POISON in my body! I have been off the depo since Jan of 09! I have a Dr appt on the 16th but I'm predicting that my dr won't have anything to tell me!

Sorry to hear about your situation! Mine was actually my Step Brother not uncle! He lived with us for 2 years! I don't understand how men can be so vial! It took me 12 yrs to finally tell my step brother off and told him to quit talking to me! He didn't realize I remembered! Needless to say when I sent him a message saying don't ever contact me or my mom again I REMEMBER what you did when I was 8 he sure did get the hint! hasn't tried to contact me in 2 yrs! Thank god!

Anyway I told DH I was getting up to get some water I really should be getting back to him soon! TY for responding!

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Sorry hun I just don't know what to say to make you feel better - email me back if you want to x x x x

I feel like AF is approaching. i'm 11dpo, & crampy with backache. It took me 14 months to conceive my son, so try not to stress, your time will come, I promise.x

Thanks you guys! Sorry about that I was just having a really rough night and holding it in for 11 months I just finally let it go! Today I am going to go get rid of anything baby that we have left! AFTER I finish my Greys Anatomy! I'm just going to sit here and be happy that I have 3 more episodes or so to watch before I have to send off my netflix for more!

Sorry hunnie Did you end up starting? Some people have AF type feelings before a BFP. I know that is probably no help but don't give up keep your chin up.

No AF yet but I was looking at FF and realized that I shouldn't be even close to starting till Thursday or Friday! I still feel like its coming! I only get wheepy when AF is right around the corner! thank you guys! I defiantly feel much better now! More at peace with AF coming!