Just wanted to add i had a mc and although as you said, at least we now we can conceive, you worry none the less. Once you get your bfp you obsess about mc etc etc.. particularly when you hear of people losing their babies at 25 weeks and at birth, scary!

Having said that, i didnt find this thread offensive at all!!!! I very much understand what you were trying to say, good luck babe..it will happen, it just takes longer for some..frustatingly enough, xxx

Im coming up on 2 years of TTC and no BFP for me.... I find it very hard to think about sometimes.... It makes it even hard for me to come in the TTC forum... But I go in my phases.... Sometimes it helps to come in here and read that there are other girls in the same boat as me... then there are times I just avoid the subject.... But it would be nice to know if Hubby and I work....

(note to self, you got the refferal....just need to get the balls to make the appointment )

We're also TTC #1 and no so far. Off BCP for 6 months, trying seriously for 2 months so still hopeful!

i thought the SAME way. Thinking how lucky some ladies are to even have SEEN a bfp...atleast they 'know' it 'could happen'. I was hitting rock bottom going on half a year without even seeing what 2 lines looked like but it has finally happened and i think well, i just needed to wait a bit longer is all!

Good luck ladies!!!

I agree with Michy though, i am more stressed now hoping bean is ok and growing than i ever was about ttc. I don't think the worrying ever stops though xoxo. wishing you all the best!!

Oh Honey, I'm not on that list, as we've suffered a loss, it's just not something I speak of frequently and it was way back when we started

It does put you on edge, because you always have the worry in the back of your mind.


This board is lovely, and such a help but with so many women brought together M/c is very common. So every time you read about a woman losing a baby your heart breaks for not only her but for yourself also. Sometimes I fear a BFP, which sounds crazy but I do. Back when we lost ours we were only just starting out, so it was a shock, it was heartbreaking but we did eventually move on and start again. But to lose one now? After all these years...I just don't know if I could cope.


I know you meant no harm by this thread, I find the answers informative

we're on our 8th cycle of ttc ith no bfp, i've stopped testing for one now though until i get to at least cd34 unless im going to Drs then i will so they can't fob me off with that either. I've been through too many months thinking we were pg and nothing. DH has a daughter so i know its not him.

Thank you ladies for all of your answers and for understanding it was far from my intention to harm anyone with the thread. Although, I must agree, it does have some interesting perspective and the between the lines is even more interesting.

You are all beautifully strong women. Whether you lost and live with that fear or been crippled by how immensely long it takes, you're right, it's as some wise ladies pointed out, all a waiting and worrying game from the moment we decide we want these children till... well forever. Maybe we should change "How's your day?" to "What's your worry today?"

Thank you everyone for the answers and for understanding, if nothing else I hope this made us pause and think of how the other ones really feel for a moment.

Okay now back to ticker, knickers or sticks watch everyone! We can't well sit around and be mushy about this, we're women with missions!

You hit the nail on the head there hun - we don't know how we are going to feel in a particular situation until we are slap bang in there feeling it. it is hard - but so worth it and i promise you we will laugh about this to our children and our children's children in years to come. Good luck all - praying for sticky

I think it's easy to see others' situations with rose tinted specs...it's easier to see the positive things for other people, and only see negative in your own!

When I mc'd I initially felt surprisingly calm and had this bizarre sense of well-being and tranquility because, as you said, I knew I COULD get preg. But what I didn't realise was that this caused a short circuit (!) in my brain so that I became convinced I would fall pg again immediately, now that I knew it was possible. I couldn' see how I would not get pg again straight away, providing DH and I did all the right things at all the right times. My visits from AF each month now hit me MUCH harder. I just keep thinking "I know I CAN get pregnant, so WHY isn't it happening?". For me it has made TTC so much more difficult.

Also, as some of you have said, the next worry is 'Can I carry?'. An acquaintance of my DH falls pg nearly every month, but has had more mc's than you would wish to imagine. They're currently receiving medical help for this.

But no offense has been taken by any of these posts...it is def good to read other perspectives!!!

GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I had never seen the BFP - rather that and months of trying than losing my baby!