Coffee

Sorry girls! I see there is a positive mood on the boards today and i don't want to spoil it... but.....i just needed to say.....arrrrrgggghhhhhh!!!
got me this morning and i feel miserable! I think its probably because this is my 9th cycle TTC and so am heading into double figures now from today, but i just sat on the bathroom floor and cried and cried this morning!! Normally i am OK and deal with it all quite well but it all just hit me this morning. I was doing that "desperately trying not to cry" thing in the car driving to work this morning too! You know where you keep looking frantically in the rear view mirror to see if your eyes look red and then when you see they do, you just cry even more???!!!!!
I know its stupid, i've got to stay positive and not worry, but this month just feels like i am at my lowest ever! I am just wondering if other girls who have been TTC for a while now ever hit a month like this? will it get better next month? I don't want TTC to take over my life!

_Alice_

Ohh hun,
I'm so sorry, stay strong, get ready for you next cycle, give it everything you've got!!

lousielou

Sorry she got you, sending big hugs

jolyn

I'm having a low day today as well. AF 2 weeks late and I really thought I was pg, but af arrived yesterday so it's sinking in today. We're TTC#2, only 1st official cycle of trying, but took 2 years ttc ds. All the memories of 1st time round coming flooding back. At the time it was like the end of the world every month, but as soon as pg, it was all forgotten.

Message me if you need to moan some more x

Coffee

Thanks guys. I really appreciate your kind words. I don't know whats up with me today, I just want to cry and cry! (which i should add is strange for me as i have never been an emotional person - i very rarely cry at all).
I think maybe the first few months of TTC can be fun at times and you are learning new things about your body and stuff. Then after a while its not fun anymore, you just feel like a big old failure! You end up wishing your life away at times too. All i can think today is 19 days until i ovulate and i just want to go away and hide in a room and not come out again until i'm fertile!!!!!!!!!!!

nicola647

Hey Coffee - sorry the got you...

when did you start TTC then??? it must have been very close to when i started TTC..... cos im on my 9th cycle now. witch got me on 31/03. and i feel i can totally relate to your comments

My TTC journal recently shows how im losing the faith a bit, but just trying to hang in there and stay positive.

Hope ur ok hun

HAYS

hun i know how you feel, im so sorry the stupid got u!!!
your day will come,and that feeling will be amazing
xxxxx

journey

Sassy

awww, hon, Im sorry the witch found you {{HUGS}}

Coffee

Hey Nicola, We started TTC in July last year. Feels like a lifetime ago now. Funny really as when we first started out i was quite scared by the whole thing. Scared of being pregnant, scared of what a big step it was having children. Now it's the complete opposite! Scared i'll never have them!!
Well, thats probably not strictly true. I think as it stands at the moment i am most scared that there might be a problem and we won't be able to have children naturally. I don't really worry about never having children as i am a strong believer in if you want something bad enough, you'll get there in the end! i think the only thing that scares me at the moment is what we might have to go through to get to that end!!
But i guess thats what most people on this board are scared of? otherwise we wouldn't have googled "trying to conceive" in the first place??!!!!