we were out for dinner last night with a couple who have been ttc for 4 years now. She is slightly polycystic and extremely overweight. She is now on 200mg of clomid from this cycle (which is her third cycle on it) - which she said she is glad she's on because she didn't think the lower dosage would work for her. Secretly, I think she thinks that it will increase her chances of twins so that she can have something different to most other people. But anyway thats another story ... What i can't understand is this ...

She has been told by her doctor that EVERY woman with a normal 28 day cycle ovulates on CD21 because ovulation occurs a week before the end of your cycle ... Now I'm no expert in reproduction, but every book I've read, every website I've stumbled across, and every post I've read here hints towards ovulation at CD14 (or near to that). If she has been under the impression that ovulation happens a week AFTER it does - no bloody wonder she's not got pregnant before now ...

The problem I have is that she doesn't know I've had my investigations done and that I too am on clomid - albeit a much lower dosage. I decided that I didn't want to discuss it with anyone - not even family - as I don't want any false pity or any extra pressure from people asking how its going. So I feel I can't say that she's been given duff information - not that I think she'd listen to me anyhow.

Any suggestions as to what I can do? Or maybe I should just do nothing.

xx

Yikes.

Perhaps you can just mention how much information you've found on line about advice to help conceive. If she is smart enough she will pick up on the hint and do some research, and chances are she'll come across it.

This sentence says everything. I say leave her to it. Call me a sceptic, but I can't see anyone trying for 4 years and not researching the subject, nor can I imagine any doctor giving this advice. Poppycock! I reckon she was testing you and trying to find out if you knew anything about ttc ... that way she could sneakily find out whether you were planning a family. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I suspect this woman is mildly annoying at the best of times.

Poppycock - what a great word!!! She already knows we are trying and having some diffs, but doesn't know that I've had the tests done and been told we're okay. She can be a little me, me, me at times, and no matter what happens to me its happened to her but ten times worse, which another reason why I don't want to discuss this with her. I spoke to DH this morning about it again, and he said to leave them to it,and that her doc probably said that with her cycle being about 35 days long, SHE will ovulate around CD21, and she has heard what she wanted to hear. Or if I'm super duper paranoid, she's maybe trying to sabotage my ttc plans ... Joking.

Thanks for the advice. I think I'll let her do her own thing.

I doubt very much that a doctor would have given her the wrong info so most probably she either didn't listen or didn't get told that. I's just let her get on with it. You can't help but wonder how serious she is about it though when she clearly hasn't looked into it herself.

docs advised my friend to loose weight, roughly 2 stone to increase her chances of conception. If your mate is already very large then hoping to conceive twins seems rather daft!!!!!!I agree that most people who are trying for a baby look into when their most fertile time is and I find it hard to believe a doc would give her such duff info!!!!Good luck getting your bfp

Sounds like poppycockadoodle doo to me too! CD21 in a 28 day cycle leaves only 7 days for implantation. Sure, some gals might OV on 21 but to say all do - poppycock (as Tish says!). x

Sounds like someone I know.... I'd leave them to it. Either she was digging for info. or she's an idiot and didn't bother to chart her own cycles. Let's just assume for a minute that she's just clueless, she may not take such advice graciously especially after 4years of TTC.
P

Thanks guys for your opinions. I think the consensus is to leave well alone and not get involved. Especially as I don't want her to know what stage I'm at. I acted dumb last night, and said I'd always been led to believe ovulation was approx 14 days before the end of the cycle. If she wants to research it she can go right ahead. If not, she can keep struggling.

I think she is holding out from getting her BFP, as she thinks that the higher the dosage of clomid she's on the more chance of getting her twins. I don't really understand it. I've been prescribed the 50mg dosage and would prefer NOT to be taking it, and certainly won't be holding back to see if they will up my dosage.

Oh well. I'm sure we all have a friend like that.

Good luck girls with your bfps.

xx