I dont think I've ever honestly been this annoyed or angry in my life.

My OH and I are TTC, and we've decided to keep it to ourselves incase anything goes wrong, (had a few MC's in the past), except one person, so we've got someone impartial to talk to about it etc.

I naturally told my best friend, she's kept mild interest, texting me asking if AF had come etc when i told her I was late etc. She's my best friend, has been since we were 8 years old. I've kept secrets for her, and she's kept them for me. (For instance, her latest one, is that the guy she's with at the moment, lapsed over from the old one, by three months, and I was sworn to secrecy and still am over a year later) I kept this secret for her, she's my best friend, and I wouldn't want to hurt her even though she knows exactly how I feel about cheating, (was in a four year relationship, cheated on over 30 times, with different women, mental breakdown ensued...) especially as the old bf was one of my friends too, and I've now lost him because of her.

So, as I mentioned, I told her we we're tryin to conceive. She's never mentioned anything to me if I've hurt her, or said something I shouldnt. I've been downplaying it a little so I dont hurt her feelings by letting her realise how much this means to me. (She's been seriously diabetic since she was 4, and in the past, the doctors have told her it would be really difficult for her to conceive, unless her health improves. Let me just add that she makes her health worse by bingin on chocolate and fizzy drinks, drink 2 or 3 bottles of vodka at the weekend, but everytime she's puts herself in hospital, I've been there with her the entire time. I've done everything for this girl! I MEAN everything. I drive her around to go get crickets and pinkies for her reptiles (20mile trip) I take her to appointments, drop everything when she rings me in tears to go console her.... but I get nothing back, I dont think she's been to my house in the last 6 months....

So this morning (4.30am, tempin now screwed) I recieve a text off her new little cling on, it reads...

"I know what you and Ash are trying for, and only because I've caught Vicky in tears and had to force it out of her what was wrong.you know her situation and your out of order for being so half arsed about it when you know how she feels. you cant even look after pets and you expect to be able to look after a baby that you cant palm off when you've had enough. dont think it will make everything alrite cos it wont. x"

(note the kiss on the end?)

I cant believe it.

My "best friend" has text me this afternoon asking me what I want for christmas!! I cant believe she's so blase about it!!

My partner and I have been TTC for 6 months, we're literally blissfully happy, we're getting married, and all we want is a child. I've quit smoking, I'm not drinking, I'm taking every vitamin for pregnancy under the sun, I'm temping, charting, I've got a bathroom full of pregnancy and ovulation tests, my diary is illegible due to the amount of "CD10, AF today, temp blah blah etc" We're not even expecting yet and have started a bank account and literally every spare penny we get goes into it for the baby. I've trawled the internet day and night to get more info, how best to go about things, anything we should and shouldn't be doing, looking up cheaper ways to do things, and buy things so we have more money to put into the baby fund etc.... how this can be described as half arsed is beyond me!!

The pet thing, I have absolutely no idea where this came from. I have a very healthy 8 year old jack russell, a 2 year old cat, and an iguana. I went to veterinary college for 4 years and I know how to look after my animals. We all went to the vet, just last week for a check up, and the vet said their in the best condition he's seen for a long while. Their all trained, no accidents, no chewing. My jack russell is trained as a support dog for me, as I have ME, fibromyalgia, joint hypermobility syndrome etc, and I sometimes need a little help, fetching the phone, taking washing out the machine etc. I love my animals. End of.

I've just realised I'm rambing, but I'm shaking so hard I cant stop it I'm that angry. I just dont even know what to say to her, if I want to say anything at all. I just cant believe she'd tell someone my secret, after everything we've been through, and all the secrets I've kept for her. I'm so hurt.

Can anyone suggest anything, I'm so angry I cant even think.

Thanks guys, and a major pile of baby dust for you all...



SxXx

That is truely awful. You really do have my sympathies. Something similarish happened to me this week. My sister-in-law-to-be said that I was "stealing her thunder" because we're TTC and she's 4 months pregnant. She reckons HER mum will 'mother' me more than her as she doesn't speak to her own mother! She was truely awful to me so I can sympathise with you xxx

thanks hun.

The bit that bugs me most is that SHE actually wanted us to TTC. She pestered so much about it that we actually got a little weirded out by it, and now we are TTC, she does this? I just don't understand how some people's brains work, how they can find the rationality in their minds to carry out their thoughts!

your SIL sounds like my sister, attention seeking, doesnt realise we'll all get the same in the end.... you've got my sympathies too.

I haven't replied to her "what do you want for xmas?" text.

hugs for u too!

Awwww sorry hun! Sounds like a shitty situation to me. It sucks that she told someone else, but it's the other girl I'm mostly pissed at...what the hell kind of text is that to send to you? Just because your bf might have trouble conceiving you're not supposed to try too, or ever tell her? That's bullshit! I hope you can talk to your friend and ask what's going on. Maybe you both just need to have a really good talk about everything. Hope it all works out.

People are weird arent they?

Sounds like jealousy to me - I would be upfront and ask her why she told this girl - and that you are disapointed she did (unless you think it would all go further )

thanks for ur replies guys,

I honestly dont think I can talk to her. I'm so dissapointed, angry, upset, confused....

Thing is, we both have trouble TTC, I was told a couple of years ago I was infertile, (but the MC's made the docs hopeful) She is usually a jealous (hate the word, but its true) bitchy sort of person.

I think I'm just going to give it a few days and see if she says anything because I'm starting to wonder if she knows that text was sent or not. Even so, she shouldnt of said anything.

Thanks for all ur advice ladies.... ur all so lovely!

People definately are weird. I'm finding on a daily basis that people do things I just dont understand their reasoning behind. I dunno whether its me just being a bit naive, or people just really dont care anymore.

I'm starting to wonder whether its worth bringing a child into a world where more and more people do things like this.

I had a friend just like this. I gave and gave and gave to her until I couldn't give anymore. Helping her always came back to bite me in the a$$. It was never returned all the things and good I did for her. I kept her secrets and sadly she didn't keep mine in the end and when I needed her most she spilled...terrible thing and we are no longer friends after being friends since birth, literally our moms were pregnant together.

It's a hard situation...I never said anything to her and she took advantage...as I look back now I probably would have said something...

sorry your going through a rough time.

LOL (funny cos its true) thats exactly how it is with us. She only ever texts me when she needs something, or for me to speak to someone else for her (to get gossip, but i always refuse, because, as you might've guessed, i'm big on privacy and dont see the need to be in everyone elses business all the time)

We've had our fall outs in the past, but after a few months its all settled out and we've made friends again, I really did consider her my best friend. She knows everything about me, and I her. Gory details and everything. We've been thru so much together, but I've always felt she thought she was better than me, or more important, I dunno how to describe it, but I think disposable is the right word for now. I can really see this coming to an end, and altho I dont wanna lose a friend, I really dont need someone like that in my life anymore. I've always been a bit of a doormat, but had an epiphony recently that led to me stop being such a pushover. Its funny tho, cos she was the one who was telling me to do it! LOL.

So yea, I'm ramblin again, but thanks to all of you for letting me rant. I dont need people who are going to cause me this much misery and stress, especially when we're TTC. I'm gonna let it settle for a few days, calm down a bit, and then talk to her about it. I'm gonna make sure she knows how hurt I am this time tho, maybe it might make her realise what she's been doing.

Thanks again and to all you lovely ladies.