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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 07:56 AM   #1
xkissyx
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jealousy, anger when there should be happiness


Does anyone else feel angry or jealous when they find out thier mate/reletive is pregnant when ya should be feeling happy and excited for them? so far i've found out 2 of my friends are pregnant which i'm happy about because they've been trying for a baby and 2 reletive are pregnant and they didn't try at all and my cousin already has a little boy. 1 of my cousins with the little boy is with a guy that beats her n treats her like dirt and my other cousin is 19 sleeps around and has confessed she got pregnant to live off benefits also she doesn't know who the dad is. all this gets me angry and then i'm upset with myself for thinking they don't desearve these children and here's me settled with a lovely partner lovely home and want for nothing except a child to complete are family and yet the lord chooses to grace the undeserving.

i'm really upset with myself for feeling sooo jealous.


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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 08:06 AM   #2
BumpyCake
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Awww hunni. We all get a little upset when someone gets what we want and it seems like we've been trying forever. Just put on a smiley front for them even though it's really hard...maybe send a congrats card if you don't feel like seeing them at the moment.

Good luck hunni.


 
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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 08:09 AM   #3
mummykel1984
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hey )
my dps..brothers gf told everyone on sunday shes havin a baby...shes nearli 6 weeks...they werent even tryin was jus a simple pleasant accident iykwim??? and i am happy for them but i am incredibly jealous as we have been tryin for over 5 months now and nothin so far so i no how u feel huni...i think its understandable and basically jus human 2 have these feelins dont worry xxx


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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 08:11 AM   #4
Sambatiki
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yes yes yes and yes again!

I dont think that there is anything you can do to stop the jealousy.... But I do personally find that it comes and goes in waves.... some days I can deal with it... others I cant


 
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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 08:45 AM   #5
xkissyx
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thank-you all after having a talk with my cousin about baby names ect i feel alot better i suppose it does come in waves i'm tryin to relax more about tryin and i just gotta hold my horses n be patient 1 step at a time xxxx


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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 08:53 AM   #6
kmac625
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I know it can be hard, but that's good you're feeling a bit better now. My boss just had her second and this one was an accident (she didn't want more kids) and that really pissed me off.


 
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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 09:03 AM   #7
linsg
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Oh god, i know how you feel!!!

I had a misscarriage early in the year and would have been due now. My cousin was was pregnant at the same time and had a baby boy yesterday. I'm happy for them but really sad at the same time. I feel really guilty....

Hugs to you, hope you get your BFP soon xxx


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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 09:17 AM   #8
kit603
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I definitely know how you feel hun! I've just found out that I have Polycystic Ovaries and its been quite a struggle for me the past few months and when my friends and relatives get pregnant it really does make me jealous.

I have a cousin who was 18 in January and got pregnant "by accident" although we (friends and family) all think she did it on purpose to get a council house/benefits because she'd left home due to disagreements with her mum and was staying with friends. She was trying to get a council flat but kept losing them to pregnant women who were higher on the list... so possibly she thought it'd be an idea to get pregnant so she'd be the one getting the flat... She said it a few times you know "Oh I wish I was pregnant, then i'd be the one getting somewhere to live" then next thing you know she goes back to her mum's 2.5 months preggers!

She'd only been with her fella (the guy who got her pregnant) for like 3 months and it turns out that he's on bail for burglary and is liable to get up to 3 years in prison!! Up until 2 weeks ago she had the entire family thinking he lived about 30 mins away and was doing an apprenticeship! I can't imagine what sort of life they're going to give that poor little bean, she's dropped out of college and is getting just income support and JSA and he's probably going to prison. Poor little guy (she had her 20 week scan yesterday and its a boy)

It really makes me mad sometimes that people like her get pregnant the very first time they try, whilst people like me and my partner who both work, receive no benefits, both have cars and would provide and care for our LOs are struggling...

NOTE: I'm not judging people genuinely on benefits etc... but i'm sure most of you can understand where i'm coming from!


 
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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 09:30 AM   #9
modo
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My aunt is 45 and she has 3 children and she got pregnant by accident and had a baby boy. I have only been TTC for 2 cycles now but that still seems really unfair of God. They weren't even trying.


 
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Old Sep 7th, 2009, 09:41 AM   #10
xkissyx
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it's just so hard and i keep thinking when it gets to times like this that at the least i can provide for my child and i'm gunna try my best to give the child the best including all the love and support. i'm so relieved to know that i'm not alone on this i've baught my friends and cousins a little present today i don't want to feel like this and its so far from my personality. lets hope we all get BFP's soon xxxx

for those that need benifits and so are on them i am ok with but the ones milking the system i'm no fan of....


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