Tink1o5

1st: Do you girls feel that you should or have to be married before you have a child? Like for my case.. me and my fiance want to start TTC but we cant get married until im 22 which isnt for 4 more years, because i will lose state money that im recieving from my father passing away. So what are we supposed to do?
I'v had many people insist that we get married before having a child.

2nd: sometimes i'll be really excited and ready to start going on TTC. But then the worries set in of what if something goes terribly wrong or something bad. Then all of a sudden my mind changes up and is like idk now.. cuz i dont want something bad to happen. Any advice?

3rd: What is a good book to start reading before we start TTC. Like how they have the stages books where it tells you what to expect during pregnancy.. but whats a good one before you start TTC?

anita665

1: I always wanted to be married before having a baby. I really wanted to do things properly. I am engaged to my OH but theres no chance of us getting married before baby is born. I'd imagine not for a good year after now either. Just the way life goes.

2: I also used to be really put off having a baby incase something went badly wrong in my own situation, between myself and my OH or with the baby but if we worried about everything that could go wrong, we'd never do anything. You really never know whats around the corner.

I think as long as at the time you feel in a good position to have a baby, are in a stable relationship which you believe willl last and can provide for a child then there is nothing wrong with TTC. Thats not to say you need lot's of money because really thats not many people but I don't agree with people TTC if they're still living with their parents or entirely on benefits with no plans to do otherwise in the near future.

Myself and OH were both in good jobs with very good incomes but both lost our jobs only a couple of months after I became pregnant & found ourselves in a situation we never thought we would be in but thats not something that we could have known would happen.

3: The best way I think is looking on some good websites like babycentre.com and talking to people going through it.

xx

~bettyboop~

1. I always wanted to be married before having a baby too and wanted to do it properly. and I am engaged to my OH but i can't see us marring soon either!( am not copying you anita honest!)

2. i think everyone worries hun i did and when i got mu BFP i thought i hope where doing the right thing and of course we was, just make sure a 100% sure its what you both want because its such a big thing.

3. a good book i had was

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/i...266239&s=books

brill book! get it hunni xx

jchaney85

1. Me & my oh cant get married for a while now due to some reasons in my lilfe we are engaged tho

2. Im was going through the same thing I wasnt sure if I wanted to then I wanted to but then it just happened so Im happy with it sometimes i get to thinking and i get scard but i know he is here for me and i know everything will work out.

avistar

I am married and wanted to be married before having children. I don't really agree that couples should marry either just because of a pregnancy...I think that it is really up to individuals to make that decision based on their personal circumstances and such. We all have different paths and choices in life. I think it is best to have children when you are emotionally ready and financially stable enough to support a child. But these are just my own opinions. What works for one couple might not work for the next.

Arcanegirl

1. Im not married nor do i think its an important thing to do before a baby. Having a baby together is a much bigger commitment than marriage in my opinion.
To me its also just a piece of paper.

2. This happened alot to me for the first 6 months I would be so certian, then i would be really unsure. After over 2 years im still here TTC so i must be definate in my decision

3. Zita Wests book (i cant remember the name lol) A friend loaned hers to me and it was full of information.

Carolina

im not married or engaged but have been living with my OH for over 4 years and were in our mid/late 20s and we both have jobs. I used to think id be married before ttc but weddings are so expensive! (i know babies are too). I think the main thing with me/us was that we wanted to both be employed (i was a student until recently).

I just use the internet for preconception advice aswell. I do have that what to expect when your expecting book though.