So, I had to vent. I'm absolutely SICK of ppl telling me that because I'm young I don't know enough to know if I want kids or not. I realize that a lot of women are waiting until they are older to have children, and that's great...for them. I'm not saying that's bad, I'm just saying I don't want to. I'm tired of all the negativity I get from people around me who know that we are TTC (my OH has a big mouth and told the wrong person). We both work in the same retail store, so everyone knows both of us and we are both catching so much flak.

I realize there are some reasons why maybe I should wait. I'm in college, I'm only 20, we aren't rich. But I know several women who have had children in college, my OH and I have an amazing support network around us (not everyone is opposed to the idea of us having babies.), I know what I want, and we CAN afford a baby, even if its tight for a while. I'm sorry, I know this thread has been done before but I'm frustrated and I'm about ready to just give up. I'm tired of people making me feel like a bad/selfish person.

Has anyone else been through this? How do you handle it?

Hey,
I've not been through this personally, but I just wanted to say that I think everyone is different - and just because your "friends" can't comprehend the idea of having a baby at 20, it doesn't mean that you can't do it! I bet you would do a bloody brilliant job too!
Nobody ever has enough 'spare' money to afford a baby - you just make do! If everybody waited until they could afford to have a baby, nobody would ever have one!
Keep your chin up. You sound really mature, and you know what you want. It's up to you and your partner, don't let those misery guts's bring you down!

Oh I understand. My bf and I are both 19 and we are ttc. People try to tell me we are too young and cant handle it, but I already know I will be a great mom and he will be an excellent daddy. It sounds like you def can handle it too. I dont think people should judge anyone for when they decide to have a child. Some people are ready sooner then others.

It's just frustrating. It seems like I catch more hell than he does of course, especially since I'm 20 and my OH is almost 30.

What would I do without moral support on BnB?

Hey, so snap, i am 19, oh 20, we are at uni and TTC...u gotta ignore the negative people and focus on the people who want to help, fins NUKE, RaeW, mrs street, and charliemania...who will all help u as they have me xx in mean time pm me

I know what you mean! I'm 24, done uni, DH is 31 and has a good job and I STILL get told constantly that I'm young and have lots of time and not to rush into having kids! I should focus on my career, they say. I should spend more time with hubby, they say. Drives me nuts...but I refuse to make decisions based on what others think. Like you said, just because it's now popular to wait till your 30s, doesn't mean that's the right choice for everyone.

Ugh I dread the day when I need to book the first ultrasound, because I work in that department!! ALL my coworkers will then know, which means minutes later, the entire freaking hospital will know. Why is this a bad thing? Because I'm 'only' 24 and even though I'm married, hubby is apprenticing to be a plumber, and I'm in a union job, we're 'too young' and should be drinking and partying to 'enjoy being young' instead. I KNOW I'll repeatedly be subjected to the question of 'Was it planned?', as though it's any of their business! No one but Mum knows we are contraceptive free, and I'm pretty sure my friends will be shocked. (None are married or even close to getting married, most are still in college/university and some are still living with their parents) It's just stereotypical now-a-days to wait until you're 30. Hubby and I cannot see waiting another 5-6 years to have a family, when it is what we want out of life.

Bah to all who stick their noses in other people's business, and treat us with disregard due to our age!

Honestly, it isn't anyone's business, and it's to be handled by not letting other people's opinions step on your dreams.

Good luck and babydust!

i'm sorry people are giving you SO much flak!

i'm just turning 21 in june and i'm married and we've been trying for four months.

keep your head up and go for what you BOTH want.

GL!

I am in a similar boat, but am 18, 19 in August, and i'm often told my maturity is well beyond my years. And yet people judge because I am "so young". I've just kinda had to keep my mouth shut around those who say that and really just tell them that I know a lot will think i'm foolish, but I know I'll be a wonderful mother, regardless of my age. It helps that my mother was nineteen when she had my brother. stick in there, hun! Baby dust to you and I know it's hard but try to ignore the negativity!xo

i know what you mean =/ any time i say i want to try or my mom suspects that my OH and i are maybe not preventing it she says that i dont want a baby until im done with school. Im sorry but dont tell me what i want please. I know what i want..... Im 21 btw haha