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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 08:27 AM   #1
 
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So depressed


AF showed up yesterday.... feel so empty. To make matters worse my employer is still trying to coerce me into doing a new job which I believe to be dangerous even though they know we are trying for a baby again after 3 miscarriages.

I've got an appeal hearing soon and if they still won't budge, I will have to leave my job and claim constructive dismissal at tribunal. I have been diagnosed as starting to suffer depression as a result (reactive depression)

All I want is to be allowed to continue doing my job that I have done for the last 4 and a half years and be allowed to try for a baby without feeling frightened of going to work everyday.

My DH now says we cannot try for a baby anymore because we cannot risk me being pregnant and not being able to work. He also thinks the stress of what I'm going through would be too much to cope with if pregnant and I agree with him.

I'm having a dreadful time and nothing seems worthwhile anymore
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 08:31 AM   #2
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aww hunny, your work are being very unreasonable, how come they wont just leave you be and let you carry on with the job you are currently doing ? I know it might not be the best option, but couldnt you find another job, doing what you are doing now then you can continue to TTC without any worry ?

everything is worthwhile hunny, trust me, at the moment it might seem different but Im a true believer that everything happens for a reason, so hang in there things will get better xxxx
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 09:21 AM   #3
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Sedning good vibes for you Whirlygirl......Sorry you are having problems at work with this. The workplace just does not see the way of a woman sometimes........ARGHHHH!!! I would say try your best to stay upbeat and concentrate on yourself feeling great. Do what's best for you and your marriage first and foremost.....so try and cheer up for DH and don't let them capitalists (LOL) get you down....

Good luck for TTC - I am sure you will get there!
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 10:27 AM   #4
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aww
I am sending u hugs!
I am so sorry and I can imagine how you feel. I am having tough time at work as well.. and everything is related with each other.. my miscarriage, ttc, stress at work.. it is just making me stress and depressed.
The only good thing about whats going on with me, is that I can live with no job.. hubby's income is perfect thank God! the thing is that what if I will become bored or something.

Anyway, I hope u know what's right for you and hope u get a beneficial outcome.
I am sorry about ur 3 miscarriages, I didnt know about them.
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 12:59 PM   #5
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I'm sorry AF got you. It's a horrible thing that your job is trying to do to you, employers should have more respect for women in the work place. I agree with scotchbonnet, the two most important things right now are your health and your marriage, no job is worth being put through what they are putting you through.
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 13:09 PM   #6
 
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Thanks girls


Thank you for your nice posts. I really appreciate it. I have started applying for other jobs. I will have to put TTC on hold for a while to build up the same maternity benefits in another organisation but you're right, no job is worth what this is doing to me. These people are just bullies.
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 13:40 PM   #7
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I know it's hard, changing jobs is never easy (I actually find it quite scary myself) and it's sad that you have to put TTC on hold for a while. But you deserve a better job, with people who will appreciate the work you do and understand if you are TTC.
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Old Oct 10th, 2007, 22:02 PM   #8
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I am so sorry you feel like this hun & the got you. Don't give up on your dreams though (both of you) maybe you could consider another work place?

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Old Oct 22nd, 2007, 16:05 PM   #9
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No wonder you're depressed. I wouldn't be surprised if all the stress is hindering you getting pregnant.

I'm pregnant with my 3rd baby now. After suffering work injuries, becoming unfairly dismissed, and going to court for several years, I must acknowledge that my children (at 4 and 6 when this all began 4 yrs ago) were the one who helped me with house chores, and suicidal thoughts. For this (and many other reasons), I would say I'd try for kids over a job any day.

On the other hand, it is stressful having kids too, so if there is financial hardship I'd address that situation first. Maybe further education to enhance your career opportunities will also get you out of the depression and stop you feeling desperate for a child?
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Old Oct 23rd, 2007, 06:41 AM   #10
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Am sorry u are feeling like this and hope u find a solution to ur problem.
Wish u the best
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