advise needed?

vixy · Mar 12th, 2009, 16:28 PM

I had a miscarriage in September, obviously this was heartbreaking and unfortunatly at the same time my partners close family member got pregnant by a one night stand and decided to keep it. Her baby is due in the next couple of weeks and i cannot stand to see or hear about it. We have been trying to get pregnant since it happened with no luck, im completly obsessed by it and have sex to try and make a baby, not for fun anymore!! Im still young but have wanted children fairly young my whole life and have a stable home and income and amazing partner to bring a baby in to the world with. We just cant seem to get pregnant again, i do tests every month and convine myself im going to be pregnant and am devastated every time the test is negative, i got so stressed last month my period was 3 weeks late. Can anyone give me and advise on what to do or thing to try??
Any help would be appreciated.
Thanks

moomoo · Mar 12th, 2009, 16:56 PM

Hi vixy, we were trying for 5 months after a mc when i finally fell. On that month i took epo for my cm, and was drinking green tea, and i firmly believed this is what helped me!!!

good luck

x

Frippledip · Mar 12th, 2009, 16:57 PM

So sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. The only advice I can give is to proactively do what you can to relax. You're not helping yourself by getting so stressed that your O is delayed. I know it's difficult but you've got learn to get your mind off of it as much as possible. Sometimes if you take control and start charting then you might feel better by knowing exactly what is going on in your cycle.

Sunshine80 · Mar 12th, 2009, 17:13 PM

Hi Vixy,

So sorry to hear about your m/c and all that you have been through in the last little while.

I do agree with Frippledip that you need to try to relax and de-stress a little. I know it's easier said then done but I think that may do the trick. If you think about it too much and stress all the time it won't happen. If you relax and just have fun with it you will be pleasantly surprised when you least expect it. I'm not an expert by far but stress can effect so many things from not happening.

Sending lots of baby dust your way

. Good luck sweety and keep us updated.

Sunshine80

tinkerbell82 · Mar 12th, 2009, 17:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vixy

I had a miscarriage in September, obviously this was heartbreaking and unfortunatly at the same time my partners close family member got pregnant by a one night stand and decided to keep it. Her baby is due in the next couple of weeks and i cannot stand to see or hear about it. We have been trying to get pregnant since it happened with no luck, im completly obsessed by it and have sex to try and make a baby, not for fun anymore!! Im still young but have wanted children fairly young my whole life and have a stable home and income and amazing partner to bring a baby in to the world with. We just cant seem to get pregnant again, i do tests every month and convine myself im going to be pregnant and am devastated every time the test is negative, i got so stressed last month my period was 3 weeks late. Can anyone give me and advise on what to do or thing to try??
Any help would be appreciated.
Thanks

Hey, sorry to hear you are having a rough time, its so hard, because a month is a long time when your ttc, just some advice..the month of January I was a week late because I stressed SO much, Like i obsessed over everything that month, googled everything I felt and at the end of it was devastated because

showed. The next month, (the month of feb) I made the concious decision to relax and go with the flow and NOT STRESS!!! I made it through the whole month without stressing once over a twinge and i did'nt symptom spot once made BD fun as it had became a bit routiney!! and it worked for us. so just some reasurance that if you try and relax and try to push it to the back of your mind, you might be pleasantly surprised!! good luck I hope you get your Bfp.

xXx

MissingBubs · Mar 12th, 2009, 17:18 PM

So sorry to hear of your situation. I can truely understand why you are so stressed about it, but relaxing is my only advice. Easier said than done I know, but you are obviously having physical as well as emotional problems due to the stress. Maybe stop buying the tests too. Save money for when you do get your BFP. Reading some of the ladies stories on here made me very humble after my mc. Seeing what hell and trauma some of the ladies go through and how strong they were afterwards certainly helped me. XX

Laurenj22 · Mar 12th, 2009, 17:27 PM

Hi Vixy

So sorry to hear for your loss. I am also ttc after a m/c in February and am quickly realising that it doesn't take much to become obssessed with getting a bfp.

I know it's easier said than done but you do need to relax. I have started charting with fertility friend, I'm not temping at the moment as don't have a reliable thermometer but find being able to put my cm and symptoms on something that I can look at to compare helps to give me something to look forward to.

I haven't been able to work out when I'm due to ov so myself and OH are just enjoying the practising at the moment in the hope that we may get lucky.

If you chart then you might find you'll have more fun

as you'll be more relaxed.

Good luck and let us know how you get on, if you need anyone to vent off to just pm me

P.s. I know how you feel re: pg relative, my friend gave birth two weeks ago and I have only be able to visit once as it sets off the questions. (Why me, what did I do wrong.. the usual)

xx

vixy · Mar 13th, 2009, 14:06 PM

Thank you so much for everyones replies. To be honest its nice to have people to talk to about it as i find it very difficult to show people when im upset, i tend to put on an act without realising.
I know this may sound silly but could you please bring me up to date on all the terms everyone uses. Such as BFP etc?
Much appreciated.
I will keep posting as its a great ventand knowing other people are in the same boat is reasuring it may happen for me!
Thanks again everyone

KiwiGal · Mar 13th, 2009, 14:25 PM

Hi Vixy, So sorry to hear what you are going through.

In regard to the terms used this part of the forum helped me with all the abbreviations, hope it helps.

BabyandBump Lingo & Abbreviations

AtomicPink · Mar 13th, 2009, 14:34 PM

You gotta stop worrying! I did this after my first mc and was going crazy and getting no-where. it was only when I relaxed a bit and accepted things that I got pregnant again!

Good luck chick, i know just how you feel xxxxxxxxxx

Mar 12th, 2009, 16:28 PM	#1
vixy Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Midlands - England Posts: 1,026	advise needed? I had a miscarriage in September, obviously this was heartbreaking and unfortunatly at the same time my partners close family member got pregnant by a one night stand and decided to keep it. Her baby is due in the next couple of weeks and i cannot stand to see or hear about it. We have been trying to get pregnant since it happened with no luck, im completly obsessed by it and have sex to try and make a baby, not for fun anymore!! Im still young but have wanted children fairly young my whole life and have a stable home and income and amazing partner to bring a baby in to the world with. We just cant seem to get pregnant again, i do tests every month and convine myself im going to be pregnant and am devastated every time the test is negative, i got so stressed last month my period was 3 weeks late. Can anyone give me and advise on what to do or thing to try?? Any help would be appreciated. Thanks

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2009, 16:56 PM	#2
moomoo Other BnB Addict Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Somerset - Oooh arrrr! Posts: 5,778	Hi vixy, we were trying for 5 months after a mc when i finally fell. On that month i took epo for my cm, and was drinking green tea, and i firmly believed this is what helped me!!! good luck x

Status: Online

Mar 12th, 2009, 16:57 PM	#3
Frippledip Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: San Diego, CA Posts: 721	So sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. The only advice I can give is to proactively do what you can to relax. You're not helping yourself by getting so stressed that your O is delayed. I know it's difficult but you've got learn to get your mind off of it as much as possible. Sometimes if you take control and start charting then you might feel better by knowing exactly what is going on in your cycle.

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2009, 17:13 PM	#4
Sunshine80 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Canada Posts: 89	Hi Vixy, So sorry to hear about your m/c and all that you have been through in the last little while. I do agree with Frippledip that you need to try to relax and de-stress a little. I know it's easier said then done but I think that may do the trick. If you think about it too much and stress all the time it won't happen. If you relax and just have fun with it you will be pleasantly surprised when you least expect it. I'm not an expert by far but stress can effect so many things from not happening. Sending lots of baby dust your way. Good luck sweety and keep us updated. Sunshine80

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2009, 17:18 PM	#6
MissingBubs Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Cheshire Posts: 638	So sorry to hear of your situation. I can truely understand why you are so stressed about it, but relaxing is my only advice. Easier said than done I know, but you are obviously having physical as well as emotional problems due to the stress. Maybe stop buying the tests too. Save money for when you do get your BFP. Reading some of the ladies stories on here made me very humble after my mc. Seeing what hell and trauma some of the ladies go through and how strong they were afterwards certainly helped me. XX

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2009, 17:27 PM	#7
Laurenj22 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Teesside Posts: 949	Hi Vixy So sorry to hear for your loss. I am also ttc after a m/c in February and am quickly realising that it doesn't take much to become obssessed with getting a bfp. I know it's easier said than done but you do need to relax. I have started charting with fertility friend, I'm not temping at the moment as don't have a reliable thermometer but find being able to put my cm and symptoms on something that I can look at to compare helps to give me something to look forward to. I haven't been able to work out when I'm due to ov so myself and OH are just enjoying the practising at the moment in the hope that we may get lucky. If you chart then you might find you'll have more fun as you'll be more relaxed. Good luck and let us know how you get on, if you need anyone to vent off to just pm me P.s. I know how you feel re: pg relative, my friend gave birth two weeks ago and I have only be able to visit once as it sets off the questions. (Why me, what did I do wrong.. the usual) xx

Status: Offline

Mar 13th, 2009, 14:06 PM	#8
vixy Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Midlands - England Posts: 1,026	Thank you so much for everyones replies. To be honest its nice to have people to talk to about it as i find it very difficult to show people when im upset, i tend to put on an act without realising. I know this may sound silly but could you please bring me up to date on all the terms everyone uses. Such as BFP etc? Much appreciated. I will keep posting as its a great ventand knowing other people are in the same boat is reasuring it may happen for me! Thanks again everyone

Status: Offline

Mar 13th, 2009, 14:25 PM	#9
KiwiGal Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 125	Hi Vixy, So sorry to hear what you are going through. In regard to the terms used this part of the forum helped me with all the abbreviations, hope it helps. BabyandBump Lingo & Abbreviations

Status: Offline

Mar 13th, 2009, 14:34 PM	#10
AtomicPink Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Scotland Posts: 19,122	You gotta stop worrying! I did this after my first mc and was going crazy and getting no-where. it was only when I relaxed a bit and accepted things that I got pregnant again! Good luck chick, i know just how you feel xxxxxxxxxx

Status: Offline

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