How do you cope with your BFN?

Eternal · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:04 AM

I have only been trying for a month and I am totally going out of my mind! How do you cope getting your BFN? I have got it into my head that I am not Preg this month and any "symptoms" I am feeling are either an illness or hormones reacting from having the implant out! and now i am let feeling really flat and down?

How do you go on after having a BFN? if there anything you do to pick your self up?

I keep telling myself that if

turns up then at least the "fun" begins again, I hate this 2ww nonsence but the actual trying is fun thinking have we done it, can we do it again today? lol! so i am trying to think of positive lists of things that can be done or can do when

shows up.

1. lots and lots of

2. eat and heap load of rubbish food and not worry about what thats doing to the "baby"
3. Get all my dental treatment sorted

Anyone else?

buffy · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:21 AM

Aw I know hon. It's gutting once you get it into your head that you might be and then you get a bit disappointment! I'm starting to get used to the disappointed feeling as i've had it time and time again, so I'm now starting to expect BFN's. I'll probably pass out in shock the day I get my BFP. Still, it's always disheartening. I try to cheer myself up by getting my frends round the house for lots of wine and junk food, which I really really enjoy and then remind myself that i should make the most of nights like that while I can! Another good one is browsing the internet for bargain holidays and seeing if there are any last minute deals. There is nothing better for forgetting the stress of babymaking than getting a bargain last minute break! Again, something you won't be able to do once LO arrives! xxx

vikki1978 · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:22 AM

Hi i think the way to look at is is that it will happen but on months that it doesnt then you have a whole fresh month of ttc again ahead of you which could be your month for your BFP!! Keep positive xx Good Luck i hope it happens for you VERY soon!! xxx

Eternal · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buffy

Aw I know hon. It's gutting once you get it into your head that you might be and then you get a bit disappointment! I'm starting to get used to the disappointed feeling as i've had it time and time again, so I'm now starting to expect BFN's. I'll probably pass out in shock the day I get my BFP. Still, it's always disheartening. I try to cheer myself up by getting my frends round the house for lots of wine and junk food, which I really really enjoy and then remind myself that i should make the most of nights like that while I can! Another good one is browsing the internet for bargain holidays and seeing if there are any last minute deals. There is nothing better for forgetting the stress of babymaking than getting a bargain last minute break! Again, something you won't be able to do once LO arrives! xxx

Good ideas, maybe should book a weekend away somewhere! that could be what we need! thanks!

As for friends ect, I moved from Wales to Scotland when I got married so my friends are back home and most of my friends I made here have babies which doenst help lol! makes me really homesick cos I used to be extrmely social and now I dont have those sorts of friends, plus I live really rural so it takes loads of effort to arrange something! :S Maybe can take a trip back home and go out with friends!

I have everything crossed for you to get your BFP this month, but dont get too shocked lol! send you

and

Eternal · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vikki1978

Hi i think the way to look at is is that it will happen but on months that it doesnt then you have a whole fresh month of ttc again ahead of you which could be your month for your BFP!! Keep positive xx Good Luck i hope it happens for you VERY soon!! xxx

Thanks, thats good advice! I am looking forward to learning my cycles better as this was my first month off the implant things are probably not quite right yet, I was super surprised when I did ovulate!

Thanks for the advice!

Mrs G · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:50 AM

Hi

I don't think

is ever easy to deal with, however much you prepare yourself. Over the months I've gone for the "yes I'm def pg PMA" approach and also the "i'm def not, so it wont be a shock when af arrives" approach.
Every month I cry and then it actually feels like a weight has been lifted cos you know you can start planning again and like you said, the curse of 2ww is over.

At the end of the day, it is one thing we can do absolutely nothing about. Some of us will be lucky and get

quickly, others of us will still be here month after month, some will leave ttc only to come back after something sad happening. I beleive in everything happening for a reason and I think that when it is my time, I'll get my

.

Sorry, that got a bit deep and meaningful there !!

Good luck!!

lou1979 · Feb 20th, 2009, 07:53 AM

Mrs G you are totally right!!

Eternal · Feb 20th, 2009, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mrs G

Hi

I don't think

is ever easy to deal with, however much you prepare yourself. Over the months I've gone for the "yes I'm def pg PMA" approach and also the "i'm def not, so it wont be a shock when af arrives" approach.
Every month I cry and then it actually feels like a weight has been lifted cos you know you can start planning again and like you said, the curse of 2ww is over.

At the end of the day, it is one thing we can do absolutely nothing about. Some of us will be lucky and get

quickly, others of us will still be here month after month, some will leave ttc only to come back after something sad happening. I beleive in everything happening for a reason and I think that when it is my time, I'll get my

.

Sorry, that got a bit deep and meaningful there !!

Good luck!!

Hi, wow, you are so right, the worse bit of it all is the horrible 2ww, and either way that comes to an end when you get your

or

.

I too believe everything happens for a reason, and I know that if it doesnt happen this month or next or 12 months later it is for a reason. its just how to get over the flippin 2ww, cant beleive everyone is so sane after going through that every month! I cant wait for mine to be over and I am still in the first week (i think, not 100% when you start counting from)

thanks for that, its all so true and helps keep everything in perspecive!

Good luck to you and sendingn you lots of

your way

hopefulfor09 · Feb 20th, 2009, 11:35 AM

I hate BFNs - I think we all do. Takes the wind right out of your sails. I have had so many months of them, feeling gutted and crying - I really try not to test anymore. I find the witch to be a much easier letdown than the BFN. TTC is a rollercoaster....but what keeps me going is that it's like DH and I have this secret - and while it's caused an argument or two (he is just as let down as I am with the arrival of the witch and we bicker sometimes), ttc has brought us closer - like we're conspiring together and I know that if and when we get our BFP - we'll be on cloud nine. It's hard but I think its important to not let ttc take over your life - that's something I have learned on my journey. I am focusing on living in the moment - and am just enjoying all the bd'ing.

I hope we all get oru BFPs soon.

Babydust and hugs.

JayDee · Feb 20th, 2009, 13:14 PM

I know exactly what you mean Eternal, I'm the same, first month of trying and think AF has got me.

I am coming round to the "it'll happen when the time is right, whether we know it's right or not" point of view during the course of the day. Also think that it helps to see that there are so many other people on here that have been through the same thing - very few members appear to have got a result in the first month.

I've been not drinking for a few weeks "just in case" so if AF has got me I'm going to swap the bottle of non alcoholic wine in the fridge for an alcoholic version for tomorrow night (for one night only, then I'll start being healthy again in preparation for next month).

Good luck x x x x

Feb 20th, 2009, 07:04 AM	#1
Eternal Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Swansea, Wales Posts: 6,624	How do you cope with your BFN? I have only been trying for a month and I am totally going out of my mind! How do you cope getting your BFN? I have got it into my head that I am not Preg this month and any "symptoms" I am feeling are either an illness or hormones reacting from having the implant out! and now i am let feeling really flat and down? How do you go on after having a BFN? if there anything you do to pick your self up? I keep telling myself that if turns up then at least the "fun" begins again, I hate this 2ww nonsence but the actual trying is fun thinking have we done it, can we do it again today? lol! so i am trying to think of positive lists of things that can be done or can do when shows up. 1. lots and lots of 2. eat and heap load of rubbish food and not worry about what thats doing to the "baby" 3. Get all my dental treatment sorted Anyone else?

Status: Offline

Feb 20th, 2009, 07:21 AM	#2
buffy Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: S W. Scotland Posts: 296	Aw I know hon. It's gutting once you get it into your head that you might be and then you get a bit disappointment! I'm starting to get used to the disappointed feeling as i've had it time and time again, so I'm now starting to expect BFN's. I'll probably pass out in shock the day I get my BFP. Still, it's always disheartening. I try to cheer myself up by getting my frends round the house for lots of wine and junk food, which I really really enjoy and then remind myself that i should make the most of nights like that while I can! Another good one is browsing the internet for bargain holidays and seeing if there are any last minute deals. There is nothing better for forgetting the stress of babymaking than getting a bargain last minute break! Again, something you won't be able to do once LO arrives! xxx

Status: Offline

Feb 20th, 2009, 07:22 AM	#3
vikki1978 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: kent uk Posts: 284	Hi i think the way to look at is is that it will happen but on months that it doesnt then you have a whole fresh month of ttc again ahead of you which could be your month for your BFP!! Keep positive xx Good Luck i hope it happens for you VERY soon!! xxx

Status: Offline

Feb 20th, 2009, 07:50 AM	#6
Mrs G Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Bournemouth, UK Posts: 3,566	Hi I don't think is ever easy to deal with, however much you prepare yourself. Over the months I've gone for the "yes I'm def pg PMA" approach and also the "i'm def not, so it wont be a shock when af arrives" approach. Every month I cry and then it actually feels like a weight has been lifted cos you know you can start planning again and like you said, the curse of 2ww is over. At the end of the day, it is one thing we can do absolutely nothing about. Some of us will be lucky and get quickly, others of us will still be here month after month, some will leave ttc only to come back after something sad happening. I beleive in everything happening for a reason and I think that when it is my time, I'll get my . Sorry, that got a bit deep and meaningful there !! Good luck!!

Status: Offline

Feb 20th, 2009, 07:53 AM	#7
lou1979 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Northants Posts: 1,945	Mrs G you are totally right!!

Status: Offline

Feb 20th, 2009, 11:35 AM	#9
hopefulfor09 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Toronto, Canada Posts: 1,138	I hate BFNs - I think we all do. Takes the wind right out of your sails. I have had so many months of them, feeling gutted and crying - I really try not to test anymore. I find the witch to be a much easier letdown than the BFN. TTC is a rollercoaster....but what keeps me going is that it's like DH and I have this secret - and while it's caused an argument or two (he is just as let down as I am with the arrival of the witch and we bicker sometimes), ttc has brought us closer - like we're conspiring together and I know that if and when we get our BFP - we'll be on cloud nine. It's hard but I think its important to not let ttc take over your life - that's something I have learned on my journey. I am focusing on living in the moment - and am just enjoying all the bd'ing. I hope we all get oru BFPs soon. Babydust and hugs.

Status: Offline

Feb 20th, 2009, 13:14 PM	#10
JayDee Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: UK Posts: 3,625	I know exactly what you mean Eternal, I'm the same, first month of trying and think AF has got me. I am coming round to the "it'll happen when the time is right, whether we know it's right or not" point of view during the course of the day. Also think that it helps to see that there are so many other people on here that have been through the same thing - very few members appear to have got a result in the first month. I've been not drinking for a few weeks "just in case" so if AF has got me I'm going to swap the bottle of non alcoholic wine in the fridge for an alcoholic version for tomorrow night (for one night only, then I'll start being healthy again in preparation for next month). Good luck x x x x

Status: Offline

Similar Threads
How do you cope with your due date?	Miscarriage Support
Ladies with Pregnancy Rhinitis How do you cope with the congestion?	Pregnancy - Third Trimester
How did you cope with your EDD	Miscarriage Support
How did you cope with your due date?	Miscarriage Support

User Name		Remember Me?
Password