4 years old and still having potty accidents!

courtneyriot · Nov 21st, 2009, 13:33 PM

My 4 year old is still having accidents. She has atleast one a day. I don't understand how she can get up and go to the bathroom on her own and still have accidents. She always apologizes after and says "Im sorry it was an accident". But accidents EVERY day? Anyone have this problem? Is this normal? Help please!

stephwiggy · Nov 21st, 2009, 14:28 PM

i am very lucky in that my son doesnt have accidents but saying that i have a close friend who did very much so - her little girl did !!

What she did to solve the issue she made a chart with imi and they decorated it together and it was a "no more wee wee in your nik niks" chart lol

and they had all they days split into 3, morning afternoon and night time

and they had stickers for each achievement she got a sticker and when she did 3 days she got a little treat

hope that makes sence xx

Cupcakeangel · Nov 21st, 2009, 14:43 PM

When do the accidents happen? I knew a little girl who still had accidentswhen she was 7 or 8 because she was having so much fun playing she didn't want to stop to go to the bathroom. Maybe a gentle reminder when it's been a while sinc she last went?

courtneyriot · Nov 21st, 2009, 17:28 PM

We have a huge chart we did together with basically the same idea. Didn't really help much. And the accidents are at random times of the day... I think sometimes she does become distracted and doesn't realize but other times she knows exactly whats going on... It can be frustrating because her 3 year old sister doesn't have the accidents as often as she does.

tinybutterfly · Nov 22nd, 2009, 11:29 AM

could you make a reward-schedule thingy for the both of them?
and give them a golden star/sticker/flower/... for every day without accidents,
and then maybe a small treat if they have a whole week of no accidents.

young children like that usually respond very well to such reinforcements.
also, if she sees her sister getting more rewards than her, she might pay more attention
to her own bathroom behaviours

also, before anything... has she ever had periods of being completely dry for a day?
and around when did that change, maybe her little sis getting more attention for going potty
is what made her have "accidents".
if she however hasn't had any dry periods, no need to look into that, also know it's perfectly normal
and we (in the professional field) don't worry about it untill the child is 'bout 5 to 7 yrs old.

Dinoslass · Nov 22nd, 2009, 12:34 PM

I had a 5 year old last summer (for holidays) who had the same problem. I think indeed she might just forget, so perhaps remind her every so much time to go. If you let her go from time to time. (let's just try if you can) she might not have the accidents.
Good luck!

JennTheMomma · Nov 23rd, 2009, 10:34 AM

It's actually still normal for a 4 year old to have accidents. Full potty learning doesn't normally happen until 4-6 years old when they are biologically old enough. I wouldn't worry about it, she'll get there when she is ready. Having a chart does help, kids love stickers and love to put them up when they had a full day of no accidents. However, she'll probably still have one here and there for awhile once she gets the hang of it. Just make sure you never scold her for an accident.

Lovemyboy · Nov 23rd, 2009, 18:11 PM

I wouldn't worry about it, but i know how you feel. My son (who is 4 in Feb) just started 2 weeks ago asking for the toilet, i am so proud!! He still doesn't poo in the toilet all the time tho. It is a hard time, esp when other kids are going to the toilet. But i am sure ever kid has an accident at this age. I think it's just a case of being persistant with them!! Goodluck honey x

Nov 21st, 2009, 13:33 PM	#1
courtneyriot Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Pennsylvania Posts: 28	4 years old and still having potty accidents! My 4 year old is still having accidents. She has atleast one a day. I don't understand how she can get up and go to the bathroom on her own and still have accidents. She always apologizes after and says "Im sorry it was an accident". But accidents EVERY day? Anyone have this problem? Is this normal? Help please!

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Nov 21st, 2009, 14:28 PM	#2
stephwiggy Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: May 2009 Location: peterborough ish. Posts: 4,658	i am very lucky in that my son doesnt have accidents but saying that i have a close friend who did very much so - her little girl did !! What she did to solve the issue she made a chart with imi and they decorated it together and it was a "no more wee wee in your nik niks" chart lol and they had all they days split into 3, morning afternoon and night time and they had stickers for each achievement she got a sticker and when she did 3 days she got a little treat hope that makes sence xx

Status: Offline

Nov 21st, 2009, 14:43 PM	#3
Cupcakeangel Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 178	When do the accidents happen? I knew a little girl who still had accidentswhen she was 7 or 8 because she was having so much fun playing she didn't want to stop to go to the bathroom. Maybe a gentle reminder when it's been a while sinc she last went?

Status: Offline

Nov 21st, 2009, 17:28 PM	#4
courtneyriot Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Pennsylvania Posts: 28	We have a huge chart we did together with basically the same idea. Didn't really help much. And the accidents are at random times of the day... I think sometimes she does become distracted and doesn't realize but other times she knows exactly whats going on... It can be frustrating because her 3 year old sister doesn't have the accidents as often as she does.

Status: Offline

Nov 22nd, 2009, 11:29 AM	#5
tinybutterfly Trying to conceive (TTC) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 3,903	could you make a reward-schedule thingy for the both of them? and give them a golden star/sticker/flower/... for every day without accidents, and then maybe a small treat if they have a whole week of no accidents. young children like that usually respond very well to such reinforcements. also, if she sees her sister getting more rewards than her, she might pay more attention to her own bathroom behaviours also, before anything... has she ever had periods of being completely dry for a day? and around when did that change, maybe her little sis getting more attention for going potty is what made her have "accidents". if she however hasn't had any dry periods, no need to look into that, also know it's perfectly normal and we (in the professional field) don't worry about it untill the child is 'bout 5 to 7 yrs old.

Status: Offline

Nov 22nd, 2009, 12:34 PM	#6
Dinoslass Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 789	I had a 5 year old last summer (for holidays) who had the same problem. I think indeed she might just forget, so perhaps remind her every so much time to go. If you let her go from time to time. (let's just try if you can) she might not have the accidents. Good luck!

Status: Offline

Nov 23rd, 2009, 10:34 AM	#7
JennTheMomma Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,333	It's actually still normal for a 4 year old to have accidents. Full potty learning doesn't normally happen until 4-6 years old when they are biologically old enough. I wouldn't worry about it, she'll get there when she is ready. Having a chart does help, kids love stickers and love to put them up when they had a full day of no accidents. However, she'll probably still have one here and there for awhile once she gets the hang of it. Just make sure you never scold her for an accident.

Status: Offline

Nov 23rd, 2009, 18:11 PM	#8
Lovemyboy Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Scotland Posts: 439	I wouldn't worry about it, but i know how you feel. My son (who is 4 in Feb) just started 2 weeks ago asking for the toilet, i am so proud!! He still doesn't poo in the toilet all the time tho. It is a hard time, esp when other kids are going to the toilet. But i am sure ever kid has an accident at this age. I think it's just a case of being persistant with them!! Goodluck honey x

Status: Offline

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