Rachel16+Bump

As most of you girls know i suffer from depression and i am dealing with it to the best of my ability so i dont get TOO stressed whilst i'm pregnant but some times things get on top of me and i cry for nothing, i dont no wether this is because of 'pregnancy hormones' or my depression is sneeking its horrible butt back in.

The further along my pregnancy progressess the more i miss Adam, bumps dad. i can't stop thinking about him, its hard to explain really because even though i know how much he has hurt me i still love him
I want him to be a dad but like the sayin goes, 'any lad can father a child but it takes a real man to be a daddy', i know he is still young and it takes longer for lads to grow up than girls but i have had to grow up so much an i have given him the time to gt used to the idea etc. but still he goes out fightin, smokin n drinkin the lot! i wish he could love our baby the way i do, i wish he would tell me the truth an stop tellin me he wants to be there when he is doin nothin to prove it. i know its hard for him to prove it while i am still pregnant but he could at least make an effort by cuttin the smokin down + stop gettin in trouble with people who fight with guns, i really dont fancy answerin bump when hes older to 'wheres daddy? .. daddys in heaven cos he got involved with some naughty people'

My dad makes my life hell, he tells people i'm dead to him + that its my fault why hes so messed up an hes gettin me down to the point were deep down i hate him an i wish so many horrible things which i no is wrong to say/think about your dad, but when he says that about his own daughter! the more me dad treats me badly the more i want Adam to be a good daddy to his baby, i know what its like to grow up without a dad + when me dad is around hes a complete + utter tw** so i want Adam to be there for bump. Am i askin to much?

I have a sore back, all i do is freakin cry + sleep, oh an i cant stop eatin an am gettin depressed over my weight because i usedd to have really bad troubles with my wieght (un-diagnosed anarexia + bulimia) an i have never weighed so much in my life, i no its cos am pregnant but i cant shake the fact i am goin to stay fat forever now.

I am sorry about this, all i seem to do on here to you girls is cry + moan about my life!

Rant over xxx

miel

I am very sorry ...

Rachel16+Bump

theres no need to be sorry, no ones fault apart from my own i guess i let my life pan out this way? i dont know

Suz

Im sorry hun Im sure the pregnancy hormons dont help either. Sorry the men in your life are such jerks....

ladymilly

oh you poor thing. hope you feel better hun

jocatolo

hope things start looking brighter for you soon hun x

bexy_22

poor you =[ hopefully there's a man out there that will treat you right one way or another. Hope you feel better soon *cuddle* x

Rachel16+Bump

thanks girls it means a lot.
it makes me feel better knowin i can come on here an talk to everyone about things + not be judged, i know that once baby is here things will start to look up (apart from the normal mummy worries ha!)
At the minute i am havin to (TRY) an hold my head up an be strong an deal with these things one at a time its just hard xx

bexy_22

I can imagine how hard it is, I've suffered from depression myself, but as long as you keep strong for little bubs I think you'll be just fine =] x

_Alice_

Come on hun, try and stay positive, you need to for your LO x