FOB random visit!WTH

luxe191919 · Dec 6th, 2009, 19:06 PM

Ok so today I got a call from my mom telling me to come back to the house there was someone there who wanted to see me.Thinking maybe it was someone family wise and maybe my parents wanted to talk about our engagment and the baby shower David and I rushed over only to find out that the FOB of my baby had spent the day driving with his new girlfriend to come see me and that oh wait for it..........him and his girlfriend want to move up when they graduate and be involved with the baby.I was so mad he is basically using me to get in his girlfreinds pants!After he told me and his family and his freinds told me he was never going to be involved with the baby!I am so furious I had to get yalls thoughts on this.It made me so mad I didnt even know what to say basically David made me get back in the car before I punched him.

Mariaa · Dec 6th, 2009, 19:11 PM

i guess its up to him. yes hes a *******, and he may be using the situation to get in her pants. But you cant keep him away from your child. its his kid to as as useless as he is i guess you have to let the child find that out for themself and make theyre own judgements on theyre father.
All you can do is know that you and david are going to be great parents. Dont worry about him. Look out for your family with david xx

annawrigley · Dec 6th, 2009, 19:16 PM

tbh i think it is out of order he brought his gf with him to tell you that, because as you said it does make it seem like hes only saying it to make a good impression on her.
but give him a chance,he is the father after all and has a right.
i would have been angry too though!!
xxx

05wilkesm · Dec 6th, 2009, 19:24 PM

i would have been well annoyed if that was me, do you even know his girlfriend? for all you know she could be some junkie and surely you'd want to get to know the girl before she had something to do with your baby cos i know i would.
but yeah i spose give him a chance but you need to make it clear he cant just drop in and out of yours and the babys life when he feels like it cos that will just confuse your bubba, just wait and see what happens you never know he might break up with this girl and next month you'll have him introducing girlfriend number 2! Also he should have let you know he was coming to see you not just drop in, men aye!
hope everything works out okay though hun

xxx

luxe191919 · Dec 6th, 2009, 22:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 05wilkesm

i would have been well annoyed if that was me, do you even know his girlfriend? for all you know she could be some junkie and surely you'd want to get to know the girl before she had something to do with your baby cos i know i would.
but yeah i spose give him a chance but you need to make it clear he cant just drop in and out of yours and the babys life when he feels like it cos that will just confuse your bubba, just wait and see what happens you never know he might break up with this girl and next month you'll have him introducing girlfriend number 2! Also he should have let you know he was coming to see you not just drop in, men aye!
hope everything works out okay though hun

xxx

I dont know her she was in a grade below me with him so I never interacted with her during school.I talked to my freind who had her twins and asked her if she knew who she was and she said that she knew her from latin club and she was rude and obnoxious so if he really wants to get involved in my little girlys life itll be just him alone not his girlfreind of the month and itll be suprivised by me,david,or someone i trust because 1.I dont trust him and he proved that even more today,and 2.I dont trust anyone of his family members so if he wants to be involved hes going to have to do it on my terms!

Novbaby08 · Dec 7th, 2009, 01:04 AM

technically you don't have to let him see her. If you don't want him around don't put him on the birth certificate. Thats what I did with my daughter.

luxe191919 · Dec 7th, 2009, 02:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Novbaby08

technically you don't have to let him see her. If you don't want him around don't put him on the birth certificate. Thats what I did with my daughter.

Ok so could I put David as the father and give him all the rights technically?Or would he have to adopt her which either way hes going to after we get married.I really dont want the FOB around my little aislinn if hes going to just use her as a pickup line basically because I dont want her in that environment.

Shireena__x · Dec 8th, 2009, 14:41 PM

yes you can put hin on certificate, and unless FOB DEMANDS to see baby and says he'll pay for her and wants his name on the certificate and goes through dna test then he cant say shit!

05wilkesm · Dec 8th, 2009, 14:47 PM

My friend who has jsut had a baby has left the name fathers name blank on the BC, cos otherwise he has just as much custody as you, you most probably could put his name on the BC but personally i would rather leave it blank if he wasent the biological father cos i would be pretty confused when i was older to why my mum put a man who wasnt my actual biological dad on the BC and touch wood if you ever broke up with your OH hes then on your childs BC, totally up too you though hun just my opinion

xx

AnnabelsMummy · Dec 8th, 2009, 16:29 PM

it's actually illegal to put an incorrect person on the birth certificate, however, they do have to proove that you knew this (eg. you could have claimed to have an affair), but it's rare that anything ever comes of it, however, if you do not put him as the father on the BC he has no rights at all..
i only know this because my brother and i had a similar kind of set up, then it will be an even easier case for david to adopt your LO, as she would go from blank, to having a loving father, can send me a message if you wanna know any more..
hope that was helpful..
xxxx

Dec 6th, 2009, 19:06 PM	#1
luxe191919 Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 228	FOB random visit!WTH Ok so today I got a call from my mom telling me to come back to the house there was someone there who wanted to see me.Thinking maybe it was someone family wise and maybe my parents wanted to talk about our engagment and the baby shower David and I rushed over only to find out that the FOB of my baby had spent the day driving with his new girlfriend to come see me and that oh wait for it..........him and his girlfriend want to move up when they graduate and be involved with the baby.I was so mad he is basically using me to get in his girlfreinds pants!After he told me and his family and his freinds told me he was never going to be involved with the baby!I am so furious I had to get yalls thoughts on this.It made me so mad I didnt even know what to say basically David made me get back in the car before I punched him.

Status: Offline

Dec 6th, 2009, 19:11 PM	#2
Mariaa Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: WINDSOR, south east Posts: 427	i guess its up to him. yes hes a *******, and he may be using the situation to get in her pants. But you cant keep him away from your child. its his kid to as as useless as he is i guess you have to let the child find that out for themself and make theyre own judgements on theyre father. All you can do is know that you and david are going to be great parents. Dont worry about him. Look out for your family with david xx

Status: Offline

Dec 6th, 2009, 19:16 PM	#3
annawrigley Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: York, UK Posts: 10,807	tbh i think it is out of order he brought his gf with him to tell you that, because as you said it does make it seem like hes only saying it to make a good impression on her. but give him a chance,he is the father after all and has a right. i would have been angry too though!! xxx

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Dec 6th, 2009, 19:24 PM	#4
05wilkesm Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Essex, England Posts: 1,195	i would have been well annoyed if that was me, do you even know his girlfriend? for all you know she could be some junkie and surely you'd want to get to know the girl before she had something to do with your baby cos i know i would. but yeah i spose give him a chance but you need to make it clear he cant just drop in and out of yours and the babys life when he feels like it cos that will just confuse your bubba, just wait and see what happens you never know he might break up with this girl and next month you'll have him introducing girlfriend number 2! Also he should have let you know he was coming to see you not just drop in, men aye! hope everything works out okay though hun xxx

Status: Offline

Dec 7th, 2009, 01:04 AM	#6
Novbaby08 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Utah Posts: 2,384	technically you don't have to let him see her. If you don't want him around don't put him on the birth certificate. Thats what I did with my daughter.

Status: Offline

Dec 8th, 2009, 14:41 PM	#8
Shireena__x Other Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 1,279	yes you can put hin on certificate, and unless FOB DEMANDS to see baby and says he'll pay for her and wants his name on the certificate and goes through dna test then he cant say shit!

Status: Offline

Dec 8th, 2009, 14:47 PM	#9
05wilkesm Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Essex, England Posts: 1,195	My friend who has jsut had a baby has left the name fathers name blank on the BC, cos otherwise he has just as much custody as you, you most probably could put his name on the BC but personally i would rather leave it blank if he wasent the biological father cos i would be pretty confused when i was older to why my mum put a man who wasnt my actual biological dad on the BC and touch wood if you ever broke up with your OH hes then on your childs BC, totally up too you though hun just my opinion xx

Status: Offline

Dec 8th, 2009, 16:29 PM	#10
AnnabelsMummy Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: London Posts: 3,638	it's actually illegal to put an incorrect person on the birth certificate, however, they do have to proove that you knew this (eg. you could have claimed to have an affair), but it's rare that anything ever comes of it, however, if you do not put him as the father on the BC he has no rights at all.. i only know this because my brother and i had a similar kind of set up, then it will be an even easier case for david to adopt your LO, as she would go from blank, to having a loving father, can send me a message if you wanna know any more.. hope that was helpful.. xxxx

Status: Offline

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