Lola's real dad want's to take me to court because i won't let him have her all weekend every weekend.
He doesn't work during the week and has spent all of 5 hours with her since she was born.

An hour after the birth.
2 when i found out she had a hole in her heart.
2 with his family and registiring her birth.

Also because i have a new partner, whose consistent and always here to help me, threw pregnancy and threw the last few years and even know lolas born, his taking me to court to get him banned from seeing Lola.

His so pathetic it frustrates me i don't know how much he'll get.

Omg hun!! your partner shouldn't be banned from seeing your daughter - there is no reason for him to be. i think the courts will only do that if there was reson for him not to see her like if he was violent etc which he isnt so i really don't think they can do anything along those lines they will just flag it off - i'm sure plenty of jealous ex's try to do things like that. i'm sure it will be ok hun xx

Tbh, he's being a bit unreasonable...and it's highly unlikely the courts would let him take her for a whole weekend when she's so little, it would be unsettling for LO to be away from her mum, it's probs not unreasonable for him to want to see her...but it doesn't exactly sound like you've been stopping him! If he doesn't make much effort to see her, then the court will pick up on that, and as for stopping your new partner...it's just so unlikely that they would unless he was a risk to the baby...which it hardly sounds like!

Men are so pathetic sometimes! xx

His not a risk to Lola at all my new partner, and her are settling in a routinue and his never been violent unlike him.

I've told her Real dad, that he can come round and look after her at mine on his own let me have a bath or tidy up the place whilst his there and has time on his own, he just has to text me, or call.
I've never stopped him during the week and when shes older i will let him have her on some weekends.

It's just i am happy and i really don't think he likes it.
After all the things his done to me though i am not letting him ruin it.

He can see lola but why he has to try and ban my new partner from seeing her i don't know.


I just wish he'd stop being so pathetic

xx

Hi hun.

Its not up to him about your new partner anyway. Thats his tough luck. I just wanna say try not to worry, It will all have to go through mediation first and it sounds like you have offered him fair contact for now so they probably wont need to take it to court yet. It can often take 2/3 yrs to go to court so try not to worry x

As emzy said it takes so long anyway...try not worry right now!

Just had a thought...when me and my OH had some probs and he threatened court..my uncle (who deals with children etc.) said to keep a diary type thing of everything...like everytime he could've seen LO and chose not to, any time I got in touch and he didn't reply, so you could do all that and keep a note of good things that your new partner does? And maybe keep receipts of things new partner buys that contribute to LO, and receipts from things you buy etc...know it's probs not going to be nescersary, but if things do some to that, then you'll be just fine! I still do it now just incase he turns nasty again haha!

but in truth, it's so rare that he will actually bother, all men are just talk! xx

in normal circsumstances the law is mostly on the mother of the childs side! i wouldnt worry about it at all! itl cost him big time aswell.. hes just jealous and immature! just tell him to do what he will! it wont work lol x

Hi babe, as these girlies have all said, it takes a very long time to get to court.

I just want to offer you a little advice if thats okay? i really think it may help.

shelx ^^above me, has just said "in normal circsumstances the law is mostly on the mother of the childs side!" unfortunately that isn't true.

My Mother works for the police, she answers 999 calls, and she told me that quite frequently, mothers are calling up in a state of panick saying that the child's father has taken the child for the day, and is either hours late from returning the child, or has contacted the mother to say that he has taken the child away with him and has no intention of returning - and unfortunately, if your ex is on the child's birth certificate then he apparently has just as much right to the child as you do, and all the police can do is do a welfare check, and if the child is well they cannot legally take the child off the father.

I know it's so shit... my ex has threatened to take the baby away and not return as soon as he/she is born, so i went to the solicitors and had a legal document put in place that states that the baby remains with me, and if he wants to visit, then i must be present and he cannot legally take the baby anywhere without my permission - and if it ever happens that he tries to take the baby away from me, then the police can go and retreive the child and bring him/her back to me.

I strongly suggest that you go to your solicitor and ask about it, because once that is in place, your ex can't see your daughter without permission from you - therefore you avoid going to court.

I hope this helps hunni, PM me if you need to talk

Love Lily xx

Try not to worry hun...I don't think the courts will allow him to have her every single weekend.

This diary thingy sounds like a brilliant idea - I'd definitely do that! Record everything!