Stillbirth's, Neonatal Loss & SIDS

Lexi mummy · Nov 26th, 2009, 19:16 PM

hi ladies

ive had such an awful day.

its approaching lexi's first birthday and everything is getting on top of me.

found out today that my mum, sister and her kids are all going out for the day with my cousin who had her baby 2 weeks before lexi died. i havent seen her baby and to be honest i dont want to its too painful. i thought it would be hard for my sister and mum to be around a baby who is the same age as their neice/grandchild but it appears not

i tried to tell my sister i was uspet by the little gathering but she accused me of blaming a 1 year old child for the death of lexi

how could she be so cruel? i dont blame an innocent child im just bitter and jealous how is that not normal? ive been in tears all day and everyone is kicking me over and over again. (well thats how it feels)

i am also so worried about this pregnancy people are making me cry so much and stressing me out i am worried about having a late m/c. i phoned my consultant to see if he would give me a reasurance scan, i even said i would pay if i need to. well he wont just give me one he wants £190 for it which i think is wrong given my history

i just need hugs. i cant beleive my baby girl is a year old next months i miss her so much and am so sad x

Sunshine. · Nov 26th, 2009, 21:38 PM

Try not to worry yourself hun. I feel the same as you, I too find it difficult to be around babies a similiar age to my son as it reminds me of what I am mssing. Be kind to yourself

x

Coffee · Nov 26th, 2009, 21:41 PM

Just wanted to send you some

hun.

I really don't know what to say. I know how you feel though hun, it's so hard to see people close to you just "getting on with things". Its hard to accept, i know.
No grief can ever be the same as a mother's grief though, noone can understand unless they've been through it unfortunately. Try not to get too stressed out with it all hun... it's not their fault they don't understand really...
take care

DonnaDoodles · Nov 26th, 2009, 21:46 PM

So sorry hun

I cant believe what your sister said, thats just nasty. There was no need for that. But then again its easy for an outsider to say things...she doesnt know how it feels...not that I would want her too....but she should be more considerate.

Can you not pay for a private scan....im sure you can get it cheaper than £190 if you go private. I know how anxious your feeling babe, I wish it was easy like it should be.

I sat in bed this morning thinking about this baby and I thought about how every time I go for a scan (ive had 3 now) I dread it because im worrying if bubs has a HB.....for my 1st scan I should have been worrying if it was twins or not (not that twins are a bad thing lol) just like most other people would be excited and curious if it was twins.....but instead im worrying about my baby and weather its alive or not

How shit is that? x xx

RileysMummy · Nov 26th, 2009, 22:09 PM

Oh hun wish i could give you a big proper hug. I think your sister was abit harsh and i hope she apologises, you are being completely normal. Try not to worry too much hun xxx

babybaillie · Nov 26th, 2009, 22:11 PM

You will be given scans later im sure. Trying to charge u given ur past is awful.

lisa_33 · Nov 26th, 2009, 22:21 PM

what an insesitive thing for your sister to say, im so sorry things are so bad for you. i think it must be tough to see your family moving on a bit and you can't, just try to remember them being able to go out with this child wont make them forget what they feel for your angel. im sure they will be looking and thinking lexi should be this age, and doing all these things.
i cant belive your consultant is wanting to charge you £190, thats a discrace maybe explain to your mw and see if she can advise you? try and relax as much as you can your emotions will be running extra high just now.
thinking of you
lisa xx

JennieyL · Nov 26th, 2009, 22:42 PM

Awww that is so crule to say!, I just wanted to send you some hugs.. Try and de stress yourself a little and just relax although its hard I know

.. My babies were born at 22 weeks but there due date is comming up as well.. they were due the 29th of november on my sisters birthday

natp18 · Nov 26th, 2009, 23:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lexi mummy

hi ladies

ive had such an awful day.

its approaching lexi's first birthday and everything is getting on top of me.

found out today that my mum, sister and her kids are all going out for the day with my cousin who had her baby 2 weeks before lexi died. i havent seen her baby and to be honest i dont want to its too painful. i thought it would be hard for my sister and mum to be around a baby who is the same age as their neice/grandchild but it appears not

i tried to tell my sister i was uspet by the little gathering but she accused me of blaming a 1 year old child for the death of lexi

how could she be so cruel? i dont blame an innocent child im just bitter and jealous how is that not normal? ive been in tears all day and everyone is kicking me over and over again. (well thats how it feels)

i am also so worried about this pregnancy people are making me cry so much and stressing me out i am worried about having a late m/c. i phoned my consultant to see if he would give me a reasurance scan, i even said i would pay if i need to. well he wont just give me one he wants £190 for it which i think is wrong given my history

i just need hugs. i cant beleive my baby girl is a year old next months i miss her so much and am so sad x

Hi Hun

Aww it makes me so angry how those who are meant to support you i.e familie always manage to bring you down, My familie are the same. As for the NHS and doctors they dont care they are useless ,I paid for a private scan because the nhs refused too,it was that scan that picked up on the stuff they missed with my angel. As for charging you that much I would tell them where to stick it,not sure where in the country you are based hun.I am based in Manchester and can recommend alot cheaper places to get a scan done,just let me know and I can get you the details.

Hope you feel better soon xx

serina27 · Nov 26th, 2009, 23:57 PM

so sorry everything is getting on top of you ...Cant u see your mw and beg her to sort a another scan u should be able to request a scan due to your history xx

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