natasja32

I give up!! Im so tired of feeling sick with every other virus that is floating about. I miss my son and cant have him back.Ive not once felt excited about this baby im carrying now,which i feel extremely quilty for. And now i have this dreadfull feeling that something is wrong,to the point that im in tears all the time. Ive rung my grief councelar to see if i can have another scan to see if all is ok. Im constantly panicked,worried and crying. I dont know how to feel anymore. I dont know if what i should be feeling or how to deal with any of this. I just dont know what to do! I give up.

babyell

I dont know what to say to ease your pain. As I am still in limbo myself. I know you have probably been told this before, but you have been blessed with a new baby, and although it will never be a replacement. It is a chance to be happy again (or that is how I would feel). It must be hard with all the emotions and hormones, you feel you should still be grieving for you baby, and you should be happy at being pregnant again, but they get all jumbled up. The constant fear for you new baby must be so hard to deal with, if I got pregnant again, I would be constantly worrying. I dont really know what to say, so I will send you lots of x x x x x

jess_smurf

i know how mixed your feelings are and since i have been pregnant i have wanted kristian more and more and just feel like i cant relax feel like now my symptoms are going i have gone into panic mode and especially with my scan coming up i am very scared but know if there is something wrong there is nothing i can do

i know easier said then done just relax and take some time out on your own to spend with bodhi and to think about him, i do it with kristian and just feel like i can get it all out and then get on with the day a little better

hope it makes sense x x

Coffee

I worry to death about how mixed up i will feel if we ever get pregnant again, so i can only imagine at the moment how difficult it must be.
I was just wondering how you felt about dopplers and if you think one of those might help to put your mind at rest? It took us quite a while to conceive so as you can guess, we were very anxious about something going wrong. We used a doppler almost every day in the 2nd tri, just 5 mins every day and it was great to just be able to check she was still in there and ok! Once i started feeling movements we didn't really use it, but it just helped a bit to get through those 2nd tri weeks where you're waiting all the time for movement.
Of course, i know only too well that your worry runs a lot deeper than just hearing a heartbeat... but it might just help a little tiny bit?

princess_bump

words cannot express how sorry i am honey, just wanted you to no you are in my thoughts xx

natasja32

Thanks for replying girls. I just feel so helpless,confused and defeated at the moment. I do appreciate that im pregnant again,and wouldnt change having this baby for anything. I just dont know wether im coming or going anymore or what to feel. As for the doppler i was thinking about getting one,but my grief councelar has adviced me against it,as she thinks if i dont find a hb it would make me more panicky. Ugh i just dont know anymore.

lauraperrysan

oh huni, you have been thro so much your such a brave lady!! im not suprised you are feeling such mixed emotions and confused....
thinking of u and sending you xxxxx

Pink_Witch

Coffee

Aww hun .
I mentioned the doppler tentatively as i know this is the worry with them. I have heard of this happening with a few girls - not hearing hb, panicking etc. I can only go from my own personal experience, i used one from around 13w to 24w and never had a single problem. We could always find it within 30 secs.
That said, your counsellor is probably giving you good advice hun and i wouldn't want to contradict anything she has said xxx

hayley x

sorry I dont really have great words tonight but want to send you some to let you know I'm thinking of you and not just reading and running xxx