natasja32

Im so tired of crying and feeling sad. I get angry at myself for feeling this way. When will i feel happy again instead of feeling this constant sadness. Ive completely changed as a person since losing bodhi. I have no interest in doing anything. Doing the household chores has become a nightmare. My house looks like a bomb hit it. Im so embarresed. I have no interest in doing things with the kids,which sounds awfull as i love them. I dont know what to do? I wish i could be the way i was before. I love my two boys and my husband,but since losing Bodhi ive just changed completely.

serina27

Have u spoken to your mw or gp ? all these hormones wont be helping ...I just wanna give u a big hug xxx

natasja32

Hey Serina sweetie....I did speak to my mw. (its the same mw i had with Bodhi) and she said its to be expected that i feel this way because of all thats happened and ive had post natal depression before.I finished a years therepay for it last year december and was doing so well. I so want to be happy about this baby too,but im not. I feel so quilty as my kids and husband are suffering too. I just dont know what to do. I dont want to loose this baby too,because people might think im ungratefull of being pregnant because im not. I just never feel happy anymore.

babyell

Hi I have just posted almost the same thing on another thread. I feel exactly the same. My kids are dancing around for attention, which annoys me and I shout at them for the smallest thing, I feel like I cant be bothered with them. Only just today tidied up, but only to try and take my mind off Harry. I want to be pregnant again, but I have a fear now that I will miscarry, and never be able to give my DH a child of his own. FunNy thing is I didnt even want another baby, felt like I had done all that nappy and night feed phase with my 2 girls. But when I got pregnant I was so happy. It is awful all the emotions, everyone keeps sayin it 'oh happened for a reason' and 'youll get over it' 'you can try again', and I just feel like telling them to f**k off. What do they know, sat there with their newborn baby in their arms. I am so angry and I dont know why, but everyone around me is suffering. I also feel like I have changed as a person. I used to be so bubbly and happy, and now I just feel like there is a grey cloud that will never lift. I feel numb.

Lexi mummy

my mum always says "kirsty you cant be happy right now you just. you can have moments of happiness for the time being you cant be happy" she is right. our brains cant let us and our hearts ache too much. if you get a moment of happiness or something makes you laugh go with it. you will one day feel happy it will be a different happy to what you felt before though. i guess we have to learn to deal with the new people we have become. also as another lady said your hormones wont be helping. i thought i was doing quite well but since i fell pregnant i cry like i did when it first happened. not only are you greiving but you are dealing with the stress of a pregnancy after the loss of a child. xxxx

meldmac

Oh sweetie I"m so so sorry you're having such a hard time. It's so hard too when you're pregnant again and all the emotions are going haywire. I really don't know anything to say to make it better because I've been feeling similar lately too. Sweetie it sounds like you are depressed which is only natural but it may help to talk it out with someone (if you are not doing this already). It's something I wish I had of done at some points. I'm here if you need me.

lauraperrysan

thinking of u sweetie
i completely understand how and why lossing ur lil one would make you feel like this...it's the hardest thing anyone can go thro.....
massive
xxxxx

Jemma_x

Its been over a year since i lost lauren and even now i still struggle to be happy sometimes, it does gradually get easier hun and i found that i was happier more but i didnt really notice myself being happier more it wasnt until people said you seem happier. Im not happier because ive lost my daughter, my world but ive realised that i know i will never forget her and she will always be with me and ill always think of her but i have to look into the future and concentrate on being a good mum to connor.

Im rubbish with words but i hope you get what i mean

v2007

What you are experiencing is normal. Over 2 years have passed for me and i still have times like this.

I feel guilty, angry, sad loads of feelings, they sadly all come from this grief.

We are all here for you.

V xxxxxxxxxxxxx