Hi there,

I have 2 boys, one 13 year old who is autistic and I would say is probably moderate in his needs. He had major speech and language issues and lack of understanding, social problems etc, the classic signs from very early age. He is now doing well and a handsome wonderful sensitive caring young man!

Now ds 2 is 3 years 4 months and just started nursery. We had a parents evening tonight and I asked how he was doing. I was concerned that he can be socially aloof but yet prompted will speak but very shy in unknown company. Nursery staff were really good and said he was fine, but yes he did prefer his own company and they hadn't heard him speak much and he did have some set things he did (like carrying something around and smearing his water around the table). They thought he was fine in the current setting and I asked what else we could be doing and they said we could bring educational psychologist in, which is what I am going to do.

I have been watching him like a hawk since he was born and he is just so different to his brother. No understanding problems, speech and language all on time and totally normal. Lots of questions and pointing. No social difficulties in taking him to new places/peoples homes etc. Picks things up at normal rate, learns well. Doesn't appear to have any obssessions. Likes to be with you or if group children come to play likes to be with them, but plays more alongside. Doesn't take himself off by himself, he likes company.

Does anyone else have 2 siblings on spectrum that are so different, where one is so very able but still diagnosed?

Thanks for any info you can share. x

Hi Velvetina,

I don't have 2 on the spectrum myself, however my 17yr old step son is aspergers and my 2 1/2 yr old is currently being assessed for asd although I am pretty much convinced that he is somewhere on the spectrum. As I was not about for my stepson's early years I don't really have any comparisons I can make and his Dad can't remember!!!
Are you a member of any forums for autism there is one I go on and they are very friendly and an invaluable source of info....

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk

I have 2 boys who have Autistic Spectrum Disorders, they are very different. The older one is very forceful physically and really wilfull, the younger one is very gentle and calm. The older one was a fairly easy diagnosis but the younger one was less obvious however as time goes by it is easier to see the condition. I also have a middle boy who the school think has ASD (we think this too but the doc wont assess - Ill save that one for another day, LOL) and he is calm too and very diligent and responsible.
I think people with ASD are as varied in personality types as the population as a whole and this makes seeing Autism difficult for those of us who arent experts.
I would see what the docs think on the strength of the schools observations, dont forget Autism is "normal" to you iykwim, so if your younger one is higher functioning it may be hard for you to see.

Thanks everyone for your replies, much appreciated. Spoken to my friends about it, and those who also have asd children and they say they cannot see anything obvious, but like you say it doesn't mean he can't have traits in one area (social in this case).

I will contact educational psychologists and ask to keep eye just in case we need any input as time passess on. x