Newly pregnant, single and scared stiff

dolly28 · Nov 9th, 2008, 09:01 AM

I just wondered if there is anyone out there that can wave a magic wand and make all fears and tears go away???

Recently found out I was pregnant and at first I was over the moon, always said I wanted another one, but I would have to be in a relationship that was strong and settled, and boy did I think I was.

Now I'm on my own with my 7 year old daughter and scared that I wont be able to do this.

I moved away from all my friends 6 months ago, and know no one where I live. I think if I cry any more I will flood the front room.

Someone please give me a little inspiration or hope, and Im sorry to moan

Andrea xxx

Charlotte-j · Nov 9th, 2008, 09:03 AM

hun its normal to be scared and worried, i was when my ex left me. ur be ok hun, on here ur make loads of friends to give u advice, u can message me anytime. ur already a mummy so u have an idea what to expect, u dont need ur ex. ur strong enough to do this without him xx

dolly28 · Nov 9th, 2008, 09:22 AM

Thanks, I hope you are right. I know Im already a single mum, but I never had to go through the whole pregnancy and birth thing on my own before, I didnt split from her dad until she was 2, think thats the thing im most scared of, that and not having anyone to hold my hand. Sad but true

A xxx

TiaSunset · Nov 10th, 2008, 08:08 AM

First of all

to you hun.
You may not feel like you can do it now, but you CAN.
Try going to your GP and asking about any single parenting groups in your area, search the internet for some and of course we are here for you.
It won't be easy but it will be worthwhile.
Try contacting your friends again and even making new friends in your area, join a local group etc.
Try and stay as positive as possible because what emotions you feel, your baby feels.
Please DON'T give up.
You are stronger than you think.

Good luck xx

Irishmum · Nov 10th, 2008, 21:16 PM

I went through the whole pregnancy on my own and i'm going to level with ya.... there will be days where ya feel low (but just come here

) the truth is I was browsing B n B and I noticed how many probs some OHs cause. I mean yeah being single and pregnant isn't exactly a sunlit picnic, but at least the problems you have to deal with in a hormonal state are your own and ya dont have some *&^!$£* making life more difficult for ya.

I know its small comfort. But there are plenty of us here who have come out swinging. And i think many of us would agree that we are better people for it.

You'll do great hun.

lauraperrysan · Mar 2nd, 2009, 13:29 PM

Hey hun, I'm sorry your feeling so low. I went thro pregnancy alone at just 18 and my daughter is now 2.5yrs. It's not an easy journey but such a rewarding one. I am sure you will be a great mummy. One parent is loads better than two that aren't happy together.
I met my oh when my daughter was just 5 months and he's been her dad ever since. Life has a way of working out one way or anther.....
Stay stong

Mummy&bump · Mar 2nd, 2009, 14:39 PM

ye i agree with the last 2 comments hun! i never thought id ever get thru this pregnancy alone my and oh split up a week b4 i found out and hes not tht intrested in the baby! but u will get there! as the others said sum days u r really realy down u jus want sum1 2 tell u ur doin great and even jus a cuddle but u kno what u sit there feel sorry 4 urself tht day/night se by the next day ur a ll bubbley again! we dont need men, there jus a bonus for the little ones and its only goin 2 make ur bond better with ur lo!

when u cum home 4m work ur lo's will b runnin 2 u 4 a cuddle coz they'v missed u all day and ul have the double the hugs as other parents have coz u get 2 play mummy and daddy!

hope u cheer up soon

xx

edinsam · Mar 17th, 2009, 15:56 PM

Hun I'm just about to be in the same situ as u and feel exactly the same. We can get through this together. Pm if u want to chat. Hopefully my up days could be your down days and we could support each other. Hang on in there ( see I'm having a good day!!)

Lexi's Mummy · Mar 17th, 2009, 16:54 PM

I agree with irishmum, i hear more ppl moaning about there oh than i do hear single mums moaning about not having an oh, (hope that made sense)

i went through my whole pregnancy and birth alone and i dont feel it would of been anyway diff if i had a partner, Dont kid yourself that you need a man for support, we are women and built to handle situations like this, plus you now have us

i hope your ok and send lots of

but if and when you ever need to talk, rant, vent or even scream we will all be here helping you stay strong for your baby xxxx

missbump · Mar 23rd, 2009, 15:30 PM

Hi everyone
I just found out I'm pregnant and I am also single... the guy was someone I'd just started dating for a few weeks, and although I thought we were going somewhere, he suddenly cooled right off - and now I'm pregnant and 'alone' (I know I have friends and family but you know what I mean)!

Now, I need to tell him and I don't know how! I sent him an email asking him for a chat but he hasn't replied - I think he assumed I was being a Glenn Close bunny boiler wanting to be reunited with him, as the chances of me falling pregs after doing it one time are quite slim!

Anyway I think I will have to call him tomorrow and spit it out - thing is I am scared of his reaction - I am sure he'll be shocked but I don't want him to think i'm asking much of him, I just want him to know and then think about where we can go from here in terms of his involvement in the pregnancy and birth process. I want the child to know its father even if we aren't in a relationship.

Nov 9th, 2008, 09:01 AM	#1
dolly28 Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: North East UK Posts: 34	Newly pregnant, single and scared stiff I just wondered if there is anyone out there that can wave a magic wand and make all fears and tears go away??? Recently found out I was pregnant and at first I was over the moon, always said I wanted another one, but I would have to be in a relationship that was strong and settled, and boy did I think I was. Now I'm on my own with my 7 year old daughter and scared that I wont be able to do this. I moved away from all my friends 6 months ago, and know no one where I live. I think if I cry any more I will flood the front room. Someone please give me a little inspiration or hope, and Im sorry to moan Andrea xxx

Status: Offline

Nov 9th, 2008, 09:03 AM	#2
Charlotte-j Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: ipswich Posts: 3,098	hun its normal to be scared and worried, i was when my ex left me. ur be ok hun, on here ur make loads of friends to give u advice, u can message me anytime. ur already a mummy so u have an idea what to expect, u dont need ur ex. ur strong enough to do this without him xx

Status: Online

Nov 9th, 2008, 09:22 AM	#3
dolly28 Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: North East UK Posts: 34	Thanks, I hope you are right. I know Im already a single mum, but I never had to go through the whole pregnancy and birth thing on my own before, I didnt split from her dad until she was 2, think thats the thing im most scared of, that and not having anyone to hold my hand. Sad but true A xxx

Status: Offline

Nov 10th, 2008, 08:08 AM	#4
TiaSunset Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Warwickshire, U.K Posts: 158	First of all to you hun. You may not feel like you can do it now, but you CAN. Try going to your GP and asking about any single parenting groups in your area, search the internet for some and of course we are here for you. It won't be easy but it will be worthwhile. Try contacting your friends again and even making new friends in your area, join a local group etc. Try and stay as positive as possible because what emotions you feel, your baby feels. Please DON'T give up. You are stronger than you think. Good luck xx

Status: Offline

Nov 10th, 2008, 21:16 PM	#5
Irishmum Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 456	I went through the whole pregnancy on my own and i'm going to level with ya.... there will be days where ya feel low (but just come here ) the truth is I was browsing B n B and I noticed how many probs some OHs cause. I mean yeah being single and pregnant isn't exactly a sunlit picnic, but at least the problems you have to deal with in a hormonal state are your own and ya dont have some &^!$£ making life more difficult for ya. I know its small comfort. But there are plenty of us here who have come out swinging. And i think many of us would agree that we are better people for it. You'll do great hun.

Status: Offline

Mar 2nd, 2009, 13:29 PM	#6
lauraperrysan Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Dorset Posts: 1,882	Hey hun, I'm sorry your feeling so low. I went thro pregnancy alone at just 18 and my daughter is now 2.5yrs. It's not an easy journey but such a rewarding one. I am sure you will be a great mummy. One parent is loads better than two that aren't happy together. I met my oh when my daughter was just 5 months and he's been her dad ever since. Life has a way of working out one way or anther..... Stay stong

Status: Offline

Mar 2nd, 2009, 14:39 PM	#7
Mummy&bump Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Glasgow Posts: 665	ye i agree with the last 2 comments hun! i never thought id ever get thru this pregnancy alone my and oh split up a week b4 i found out and hes not tht intrested in the baby! but u will get there! as the others said sum days u r really realy down u jus want sum1 2 tell u ur doin great and even jus a cuddle but u kno what u sit there feel sorry 4 urself tht day/night se by the next day ur a ll bubbley again! we dont need men, there jus a bonus for the little ones and its only goin 2 make ur bond better with ur lo! when u cum home 4m work ur lo's will b runnin 2 u 4 a cuddle coz they'v missed u all day and ul have the double the hugs as other parents have coz u get 2 play mummy and daddy! hope u cheer up soon xx

Status: Offline

Mar 17th, 2009, 15:56 PM	#8
edinsam Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Edinburgh, Scotland Posts: 645	Hun I'm just about to be in the same situ as u and feel exactly the same. We can get through this together. Pm if u want to chat. Hopefully my up days could be your down days and we could support each other. Hang on in there ( see I'm having a good day!!)

Status: Offline

Mar 17th, 2009, 16:54 PM	#9
Lexi's Mummy Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: blackpool Posts: 1,778	I agree with irishmum, i hear more ppl moaning about there oh than i do hear single mums moaning about not having an oh, (hope that made sense) i went through my whole pregnancy and birth alone and i dont feel it would of been anyway diff if i had a partner, Dont kid yourself that you need a man for support, we are women and built to handle situations like this, plus you now have us i hope your ok and send lots of but if and when you ever need to talk, rant, vent or even scream we will all be here helping you stay strong for your baby xxxx

Status: Offline

Mar 23rd, 2009, 15:30 PM	#10
missbump Pregnant (Expecting) New BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 7	Hi everyone I just found out I'm pregnant and I am also single... the guy was someone I'd just started dating for a few weeks, and although I thought we were going somewhere, he suddenly cooled right off - and now I'm pregnant and 'alone' (I know I have friends and family but you know what I mean)! Now, I need to tell him and I don't know how! I sent him an email asking him for a chat but he hasn't replied - I think he assumed I was being a Glenn Close bunny boiler wanting to be reunited with him, as the chances of me falling pregs after doing it one time are quite slim! Anyway I think I will have to call him tomorrow and spit it out - thing is I am scared of his reaction - I am sure he'll be shocked but I don't want him to think i'm asking much of him, I just want him to know and then think about where we can go from here in terms of his involvement in the pregnancy and birth process. I want the child to know its father even if we aren't in a relationship.

Status: Offline

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