Torialou

I'm meeting with the man who's most likely LOs father on Saturday...hopefully. We've arranged to meet twice before since I found out I was pregnant and he's always pulled out (heh, ironic wording) of it. The only way I know it's him as the father is from the scans and how far along they say I am, if it's a couple of days out, then it's someone else...

...now the 'someone else' isn't someone I want in my baby's life at all, he wasn't the man I thought he was... The father can't be involved with us because it turned out he already has someone else and twins with her and as he text me the other night,in his words - "There is no way this can get out" I've asked him about the possibility of a DNA test after LO is born, mostly for peace of mind for both of us. Call me a pushover or a softie but if it shows he is the father I don't want to go chasing after him with the CSA for maintenence etc because that would just ruin his life...which some people will probably say he deserves. I did look into it one day but I don't know his address or his work's address just his name and the area he lives in...or *says* he lives in so they might not be able to track him down anyway.

Anyway...my reason for posting was because I was wondering what the hell do I say to him on Saturday? We've kept in touch throughout the pregnancy and he knows I'm having a boy and what I'm naming him, he knows I'm well and truly skint but I don't think he's going to be giving me a nice load of money to help me out...he just said he wants to meet for a bite to eat, a couple of pints and a talk about MY options, oh and he also said 'No sex, I promise xx' As if.

I don't know whether to be angry with him or not, because no matter what happens now, I've got something very precious to me, and after the years or trying and getting nowhere before something I never thought I would have.

Argh...I jsut don't know what to do or what I'm going to say to him. I think what's most frustrating is that I'm letting it get to me as much as it is

nikky0907

Well,I have no idea what to ask him hun but I just want to wish you good luck with him!

And you know,if I were you I really wouldn't care one bit about him having a family and twins.
He lied to them.He lied to you.
His life with that woman is a lie and I really don't think he deserves such an easy way out of it.
He has made a child,he is responsible...no matter how much he wants to weasle himself out.

The only way I don't think a father should be prosecuted is if it is best for the child and/or mother.But this isn't,this is only best for him....

I'm just saying,you are a much bigger person than I am.Lots of luck! Will be thinking of you!

cuddles314

Don't really know what advice to give you hun, other than stay strong and focused, explain to him what you expect from him/what you would like to happen in the future, and don't let him make you feel bad -FOR ANYTHING!! Good luck hun. Let us know how it all goes.
xxx

~ Vicky ~

Hope it went well

Torialou

Thanks girls He didnt show up though...got a text message around 8pm saying he was in hospital with a herniated disc..(had to go look that up...why the hell he couldn't just say slipped disc I don't know lol) and had a message left on MSN when I signed on this afternoon saying he was out now and on crutches... *shrug*