Hi everyone ive been hanging around here for a while now! Im usually in the teen section - I'm 19 and expecting a little boy in July!!

Its been great to see that going it alone hasnt been the wrong decision for me and when i read your posts its so reasuring to know that not only is it possible but rewarding being a single parent! I realise its going to be a hard slog but I'm excited and thought it was about time to say hello!

I was with FOB for a year before i fell pregnant accidently, (i was careless with the pill) He is also 19 unlike me he is unemployed. It was only supposed to be some fun, we were on and off a lot and it suited us both at the time! It felt like the end of the world when i reaslised i was pregnant, i looked at this 19 year old BOY and knew it wasnt going to work out well. He was very excited from the moment i told him, spouting ideas of a perfect little family in a nice house with cute clothes and toys etc. Then i asked him how he expected we were going to afford this, he looked at me like I was mad and said well after maternity leave u dont go back to work and we will get everything paid for..

He was completely serious! happy to live of the rest of the country and think that would be a lovely life for our child i couldnt beleive what i was hearing. I still had to break the news to my parents, i still live at home as does he. He refused to meet my mum and dad and would not come over to my house to face up to everything. My dad was heartbroken and it was very tense at home for the first few months (they are over the moon and very supportive now) I resented getting up at 7 every morning feeling terrible with morning sickness as he slept on barely waking before 12 when he would meet up with his friends and smoke weed all day!

Things came to a head when i reaslised he was just making a fool out of me, i was saving every penny working all week until 5 calculating everything and generally growing up as quickly as possible, I lost a lot of friends becasue i could no longer do the things we used to, clubbing etc. so i told him he either sorts himself out or he leaves me alone. I hadnt seen him for about a month by this time as I told him i was not making my way to his house everyday when he wouldnt come and see me! i was very grumpy and hormonal lol! The next time I heard from him he was denying hes the father and wants nothing to do with me. On and off for the next couple of months I had phone calls of either abuse or him begging for us to get back together - i was also dealing with him on facebook telling our problems to the world. I blocked him on fb in the end and started to ignore the calls as he was ringing at 12 -1 oclock at night when i had to be up again at 7!! grr lol

Anyways I havnt hear from him since the 20 week scan which he turned up to and was escorted off the premises before i even got their for causing trouble (no i do not know why i was with this guy for a year!! lol)

Sorry about the essay but thats my situation and i hope u girlies wont mind me coming to you for advice as he has demended a DNA once the baby is born etc.

ok im done thanks for reading if u got to the end!!!
Alex xx

Hey hun!!!

FOB in my case demanded a DNA test when LO was born. That hasnt happened. He seen LO when he was 6 days old and thats been it havnt heard or seen him since.

I would say go through CSA once LO is born but in the meantime enjoy your pregnancy and ignore any crap he throws at you. He could start on about access etc and "rights" but DO NOT let it worry you.

The ladies here are brilliant and really nice!!

Hello and welcome It sounds like you are better off without the added stress from him xx

Heya

Sounds like he's a complete tosspot that needs to get off his arse and do a decent days work! Like the other girls have said, don't take any crap off him, enjoy your pregnancy x

Hey

Yeah deff dont take any crap from him, or let him get to you! Try and enjoy your pregnancy as much as you can

xxx

Hiya and welcome, as the others have said try and relax and enjoy your pregnancy xx

Welcome hun. Like the other girls have said, just ignore the idiot. Enjoy your pregnancy cos before you know it the baby is here! Worry about things as they arise rather than thinking about all the potential problems. They may never happen!

Hiya Hun, Relax and enjoy your pregnancy. There are some right tossers out there unfortunately. My ex included! x

Hi hun

Sorry to hear about the stress he has caused you - I am going through something similar myself. My ex however thinks it's perfectly ok to not have anything to do with me during the pregnancy and just rock up when LO is born (read my other posts for the full story).

He has caused me so much stress, heartache and worry I hope one day he will realise how horrible he has truly been and turn it all around - but being just 20 and very stubborn and immature I think pigs will fly before that day arrives.

You have a supportive family like me, and the friends that stick by you are your real friends. I too have lost a friend since my pregnancy as I can no longer do the clubbing thing ( I am 24 nearly 25 and for me those days are pretty much over anyway).

I have stopped chasing my ex as the abuse and manipulation got all too much for me and I was scared for my baby's health. I gave him one final chance to turn it all around and he never replied to my text....that was almost 3 weeks ago! He calls me desperate...what's desperate about wanting my baby to have its daddy??!

I have a lot of anger and just hope he wakes up one day soon and realises what a fool he is being....I won't hold my breath.

Stay strong and let the dead beat go back to the gutter.

All the best!

Hey and congats to ya, seems you've done right thing, but not continuning to be with him, like others have said soon as ya boy is here go to csa, you can do it all online, and if he wants a dna go for it, mine did even though he knew he was the dad, he had to pay for the test which was £270 to find out that our girl is his and thats the only thing he has ever paid towards her, is his dna test!!!xxx