What an idiot

I know dizzymoo is going through a similar thing so she could know something about it xx

Ah, thanks!

He 1000000% knows he's Aiden's dad, he's just being an arsehole. I gave him absolutely no reason to think I cheated on him when we were together! he even offered money when Aiden was born and tried to bribe me out of going to the csa!

Not one! Don't expect too much from the CSA I was always hoping for the best and got nowhere and was always disappointed.

Big hugs and sorry hes been an arse xx

aww what a jerk i had to do a dna test on one of my ex's altho in my case it came back negative which i was relived by because he was a druggy and alcholic.

they send out a form for you to sign asking would you take part in the testing ....send that back and then you wont hear anything as they go to the fob first.

they send him out a pck with a list of doctors he can go to he picks one and makes an appointment then rings the csa to let them know where to send the dna swob testing kit out to. he goes in and does his swob and the doctor will send it back.

then you will get your pack through the post and you will have to do the same process. if he denies baby then doesnt show up for the dna then the csa will scrap the dna and wont give him another the only way he can get out of it is by send ing in a court approved one of his own saying negative (which iam sure wont happen )

when the test comes back positive he will have to pay back every penny from when you put the claim in plus an extra £300 for the dna test.

the whole process took me from january 2nd to march 21st altho there wasnt enough dna on my ex's stick so it took a bit longer so i got mine on the 6th of may but it should of arrived on the 21st of march.

it must be so frustrating but iam here if you wanna ask me anything xxx

i forgot to add each person has to take in 2 passport pictures of themselfs to prove it them who have done the test the doc will check and then sign the back.

when mine came back negative i had a person come round will the pic and when i said yes she closed my account mine worked out great i found out who joshuas real dad was 2 weeks after i got the results and he sees him every week, gives me money and all is brill

Thankyou Naya! That's brilliant advice. Cor it all sounds really scary and official!

Can I ask, will he be able to get out of paying for Aiden? I know that he's gonna try EVERYTHING in his power to get out of it. So if he doesn't do the dna test, does this mean that he'll HAVE to go to court? And if he doesn't, what happens then?

if he doesnt go ahead with the dna test parentage will be presumed and collections will start. if you refuse to go to the dna test (which i know you probably won't) then you wouldnt be able to go ahead with the csa claim. good luck with everything! xx

if he doesnt do the dna test then the csa will persume he IS the father and WILL NOT offer him another dna test they will give him so long to reply i think it was 1 week after the letter got sent out to ask for permission to do the test. then they will write again saying if he doesnt reply by such a date then we will persume paternity and start the process of setting up a payment scheme.

there is no way he can get out of it hun so dont you worry even if he refuses to give any money to you the csa will take an attachment off his wage so it will go straght to you before he evens sees it. just make sure when you set up the payment thing to ask the csa to get the money for you because they do it 2 ways 1. the fob can give it to you straught in your hand 2. the csa can take it off the fob and give it to you.

hope this helps xx

This drive me absolutely CRAZY! In my mind, there is no greater insult to a woman than a guy denying paternity!

I hope this gets sorted out quick. What an asshat!