Anyone try counselling?

Pyrrhic · Feb 17th, 2010, 06:15 AM

Just wondering if anyone here tried professional counselling, either before you and your OH split or afterwards? If so, how did you find it?

OH and I are split, but during the time we were together I booked and he cancelled 4 lots of counselling over the course of a year. It was only when I actually split from him that he went to see someone and talk and apparently he is very remorseful he didn't go before as he found it a huge help.

So he went to this counsellor by himself, then I'm going today then we're going as a couple tomorrow. Ex wants me to go to regular sessions together in the hopes we can fix everything and be a family again. I haven't given him any hope that it will, and have told him point blank I may never change my mind but I think I should do it to give my family a chance to work. So if it doesn't, I can say I literally tried everything. (never mind the 2 years of trying to hold it all together!) Plus I feel I owe it to Niamh to try.

Anyone else gone down this route?

tinkabells · Feb 17th, 2010, 07:06 AM

I havent, but thinking of you, and if you want to try and say yes you tried everything and it still didnt work go for it, thinking of you xxx

starbucks101 · Feb 17th, 2010, 07:48 AM

I havent, wasnt worth it. I would with current OH though if things got tough! Parents have they called it a relationship MOT, has made a huge difference

Pyrrhic · Feb 17th, 2010, 11:59 AM

Counselling was.....interesting.

I'm not an 'open up and share' type of person, and being in a room one on one with someone was not fun for me. We were supposed to go tomorrow as a couple, but I got pretty distressed so the counsellor moved it to Friday morning.

Ex seemed to have a huge epiphany after he came back and found it amazing to talk to someone and see different sides of things. I just feel really down, upset, etc as I hate opening up and now feel more vunerable.

Session on Friday should be interesting.

tinkabells · Feb 17th, 2010, 12:00 PM

Big hugs to you and hope you feel better soon about your next session, but if friday's doesnt feel right after maybe its just not for you?! xxx

Midnight_Fairy · Feb 24th, 2010, 05:59 AM

well done for going though, I dont think I could do it. Hugs x

besterd · Mar 1st, 2010, 00:49 AM

I've heard of a lot of people that went down this route and it has worked great for them. But being said - if your mind isn't there then it won't work.

At least he is trying and I think that you should give it a shot. If it works then that will be great for your family but if it doesn't then hey... at least you can say you tried

Feb 17th, 2010, 06:15 AM	#1
Pyrrhic Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 14,567	Anyone try counselling? Just wondering if anyone here tried professional counselling, either before you and your OH split or afterwards? If so, how did you find it? OH and I are split, but during the time we were together I booked and he cancelled 4 lots of counselling over the course of a year. It was only when I actually split from him that he went to see someone and talk and apparently he is very remorseful he didn't go before as he found it a huge help. So he went to this counsellor by himself, then I'm going today then we're going as a couple tomorrow. Ex wants me to go to regular sessions together in the hopes we can fix everything and be a family again. I haven't given him any hope that it will, and have told him point blank I may never change my mind but I think I should do it to give my family a chance to work. So if it doesn't, I can say I literally tried everything. (never mind the 2 years of trying to hold it all together!) Plus I feel I owe it to Niamh to try. Anyone else gone down this route?

Status: Offline

Feb 17th, 2010, 07:06 AM	#2
tinkabells Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 4,088	I havent, but thinking of you, and if you want to try and say yes you tried everything and it still didnt work go for it, thinking of you xxx

Status: Offline

Feb 17th, 2010, 07:48 AM	#3
starbucks101 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Norfolk Posts: 1,033	I havent, wasnt worth it. I would with current OH though if things got tough! Parents have they called it a relationship MOT, has made a huge difference

Status: Offline

Feb 17th, 2010, 11:59 AM	#4
Pyrrhic Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 14,567	Counselling was.....interesting. I'm not an 'open up and share' type of person, and being in a room one on one with someone was not fun for me. We were supposed to go tomorrow as a couple, but I got pretty distressed so the counsellor moved it to Friday morning. Ex seemed to have a huge epiphany after he came back and found it amazing to talk to someone and see different sides of things. I just feel really down, upset, etc as I hate opening up and now feel more vunerable. Session on Friday should be interesting.

Status: Offline

Feb 17th, 2010, 12:00 PM	#5
tinkabells Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 4,088	Big hugs to you and hope you feel better soon about your next session, but if friday's doesnt feel right after maybe its just not for you?! xxx

Status: Offline

Feb 24th, 2010, 05:59 AM	#6
Midnight_Fairy Other BnB Elite Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: South Coast UK Posts: 17,320	well done for going though, I dont think I could do it. Hugs x

Status: Offline

Mar 1st, 2010, 00:49 AM	#7
besterd Waiting To Try (WTT) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 34	I've heard of a lot of people that went down this route and it has worked great for them. But being said - if your mind isn't there then it won't work. At least he is trying and I think that you should give it a shot. If it works then that will be great for your family but if it doesn't then hey... at least you can say you tried

Status: Offline

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