RosieandAlan

Well i'm 35 weeks pregnant and FOB just told me 'he doesn't love me, doesn't want a baby with me, wishes i'd had an abortion or that i'd cheated on him so that she wasn't his, and apparently i've ruined his life because he can't be a normal 21 year old and go out and get drunk with his friends.'
We've been together for 2 years and lived together for 1, we both go to uni and he's the only support i have living down here because my family are miles away and my uni friends aren't exactly interested in a boring pregnant person.
I have had to put up with his SHIT since i found out i was pregnant when i was on the pill, and he's always saying nasty things to me because he resents me for not having an abortion. I just always say to myself that he'll change as soon as he see's her and i should just hold out until then, but i am so sick of being walked all over. I think i convinced myself everything will be okay, and that i love him, but i feel llike a pathetic loser for putting up with it, when he clearly doesn't want to be with me. He's unbelievably immature and i feel like his mother when we're meant to be partners.
It is over now, and i am just in the process of getting all of his stuff out of my house. It's just really difficult because i'm going to have to completely change everything i've planned, probably move back in with my parents, stop uni, i just can't comprehend how i'm going to do it all, and how i'm going to cope on my own.
I just needed to vent and ask if any of you have been through anything like this? And how you're coping?

woadie

Oh hey... first of all, big hugs for what you're going through. Secondly, I think you've made the right decision and I really hope that the turmoil you're going through right now is short lived and as smooth as it can be, under the circumstances. Thirdly that man is a complete a*ehole! Good riddance to bad rubbish. I'm just so sorry that you gave him your heart and he repaid you with this kind of abuse, selfishness and total lack of responsibility. You've come to the right section for finding others who know exactly how you're feeling right now

You didn't choose to get pregnant no, but total kudos for what you decided to do once it happened, how you've coped, and the strength you're finding now. Somehow it will all work out, I know that from everyone here, we all just find the strength and battle on. Have a good moan about the terrible things we go through with the FOBoffs, and the struggles we have being single and coping... it does help and its even better to know that there are people who walk in the same shoes and who are here to give you a virtul hug when the pressure is on x

lillprutten

I don't know what to say but I'm so sorry xxx

lou_w34

Yeah he sounds like a tosser, your much better off, though it will probably take a while for you to see that

I was away from my family to when i found out i was pregnant (uni) and i moved back home. I dont no how long ill be staying with them, as things arnt to great right now, but ill still be staying in my home town.

Try not to let him get to you to much hun, just focus on you and baby for now, as your both all that matters xx

RosieandAlan

Oh thank you so much for being so lovely! I'm currently waiting for him to come and pick up his stuff and absolutely dreading seeing him- i don't think it's properly sunk in yet...
I just know how difficult he's going to make life because he's such a PRICK.

lou_w34

Id just leave his stuff outside if you know he's comming, and keep an eye on it so it doesnt get wet, that way he cant get to shitty about it.

Yeps most of them are twats, but you will feel so much stronger soon, at first i didnt think i could go on without him, now i just wish he'd move to the moon so i will never have to see him again lol

He will soon realise what he's missed out on, and by then it will be too late

Ash_P

Sorry to hear u are going thru this hun. But u will cope, and ul do a fantastic job. Dont let him stress u out, think of the future with ur baby. I keep telling myself that once baby is here I will have the will power and the strength to keep going.
My husband ended things when I was 6 weeks pregnant. Told me he didnt love me anymore, that he`d met someone else. He put me outta the home we bought together, took my business off me, literally left me with nothing. But I had no choice but to deal with it and get on with my life for the sake of my baby, and U will do the same, Dont get me wrong, u will find it hard at times, u`ll miss him, ul wonder what u did to deserve this etc etc
But when I feel like this, I log on here, have a wee rant, put a post up on how Im feeling and the replies I get give me the strength to get thru another day.
I suggest u do the same. I found comfort in the face that there are other woman all round the world that are going thru similar situation to me and Im not the only one that feels like this, or this has happened to.

We are all here when u need us, if u need a wee chat just pm me. Il give u as much support and advice as I can.
Keep ur chin up babe and think about the positives that u have coming ur way. U dont need a man like that in ur life hun, and once baby comes along u will see that.

RosieandAlan

I really admire you and i just can't imagine being as strong as you are- i know i can do better and he is a complete wanker, i've known that for ages. I just don't know how i'm going to cope with being on my own. I'm sure i'll find the strength in my little girl..
Did your FOB leave as soon as he found out you were pregnant?

Ash_P

No, we were trying for 2.5 years for a baby. When I did my first test and got a positive, went to hospital and they told me I was only about 1 week pregnant. We were so happy, planned to move to a bigger house for baby. Talked about all our future plans as parents. We were so happy (or so I thought) then he just came home one day from work and told me it was over. He refused to leave the house, knew that I couldnt afford the mortgage and living expenses on my own. So told me to get out. I found a new house, and continued with work (I had my own beauty salon) He then started arsing about with business details (all my stuff was still in the old house, so he had access to everything) Messed about that much that he ended up leaving me with no business.

He says he wants to be involved in babies life. but to be honest Im not holding my breathe.
He just pushs the the back of his head that he has a wife, who is pregnant, he doesnt wanna talk about it, just ignores the situation. He arsed about that much with money since we split, He was declared bankrupt on fri 13th. He has dealt with this in the same way. Just ignores it.

Things will come back to bite him in the arse. Karma is a bitch and they all get whats coming to them in time.

U will be fine huni. I dont have any family except my sister. I dont see my parents. But theres so many people who are going thru this on their own, and the strength they have in incredible. U will do a wonderful job, i bet u surprise urself at how strong u become x

louise85

Hey, sorry to hear your going thru this, seems like theres a lot of pricks out there at the minute!!

I felt the same as you a few weeks ago but now I feel so much better I' not as far gone as you (only 11 weeks) but I'm sure you'll do just fine, try not to stress out too much you don't want to be upseting that little girl!!

You haven't got long til she's here and then you'll be so busy concentratng on her you won't give FOB asecond thought!

Like all the girls have said if u ever need to have a rant, put a post up about how ur feeling the replys you get will make you feel so much better and believe in yourself! The girls are great!