How do single mums cope? - Page 2

june09 · May 20th, 2009, 19:38 PM

Good to read some comments from those of you who have done it alone, Thanks

it's good to know that it's not as difficult as it seems and that you can manage to do the everyday things.

DizzyMoo · May 21st, 2009, 16:05 PM

There are days you might feel crap or like you're just floating through one day to the next but when you get that 1st gurgle,coo, or smile you suddenly realise that it's not that hard & the good days far outway the bad days. I think now there are plenty of benefits to being alone lol Although of course there are benefits of being with a partner too.

Take each day as it comes, rest is an important thing when you get enough rest & sleep you'll find you can cope with alsorts, But feeling tired,lethargic etc & the littlest thing will tip you over the edge for that day. So take each day at a time , Within days/wks you'll wonder what all the fuss was about lol

MoonMuffin · May 21st, 2009, 20:58 PM

Well I'm not a single mom so not nearly as stressful, but my DH is working all day so I'm alone taking care of Kathryn most of the day. Things like going to pee are quick so not so bad for leaving them alone real fast, slings and carriers are great for getting stuff done around the house and If your just having one of those days, don't feel bad putting them from swing to bouncer to something else. Showers can be taken during naps or at night. I can't imagine how hard it is going it alone, but we have tough times too. Believe me its so worth it, that smile those giggles, every new thing will make it worth everything.

Freya · May 22nd, 2009, 04:39 AM

I am not on my own either (so hope I'm not butting in or come across as patronising) I have so much respect for single mummys. It's hard being a mum full stop, but very VERY rewarding. Especially as they start to smile and coo.... I cant tell you how much I love my little girl because I can't quite put in words.

I think as long as you have a friend or family member to give you the odd break (to sleep, have a cuppa or have relaxing bath), you can cope.

I know what you mean about not wanting to leave your baby! I still struggle now!!!!!! But, you kinda get to know when it's time to have a break from her/him, because you get to recharge your batteries and come back to your baby full of enthusiasm again!
xxxxx

mummyk · May 22nd, 2009, 04:53 AM

i wasnt entirely alone OH was there but in bed he worked solid nights and slept all day untill it was time to go to work so i do class my self as a single mum, OH then moved out when LO was 1 so then i was all alone, i coped fine you just learn as you go along i put LO in his moses basket in the bathroom he slept beside my bed (well in the bed with me most of the time

)
it does get hard some times especially when they cry at night which my LO did for 5months but if there is no one there you have to cope so you do.
really dont worry hun you will be fine

Katieeeee · May 22nd, 2009, 06:21 AM

Thankyou ladies

xxxxxx

missjacey44 · May 25th, 2009, 06:28 AM

Iv looked after my son on my own from day one and to be honest i havnt found it hard at all. Only hard thing is dealing with the sleepness nights on your own and not having anybody to watch baby while you have a lay in or an hours nap in the afternoon!

When it comes to bathing, I didnt buy a baby bath i got a bath support in my big bath so i dont need both hands to hold him.

When he was newborn and i didnt like leaving him alone i would shower/cook/clean and all the rest of it when he was asleep which with a newborn is quite alot!!

Now hes older, im happy to leave him playing where i know hes safe for 10mins while i have a quick shower ect.

laura3103 · May 26th, 2009, 21:20 PM

like someone said before if you are on your own from the start you dont know any different so you just get on with it!

You learn how to do things that suit you and your baby so it becomes easier for yourself in the end.

I have been on my own since i was 12 weeks pregnant and was never very maternal at all before so i thought that maybe i would struggle but i have found being a single mom easy if i have chores to do i make sure she is asleep then start knowing that i have plenty of time before she wakes up again.same again with having a shower i do that first thing in a morning before she wakes i make her bottle so its ready nice a cool for when i get out!!

As for bath time buy a support its a great investment and i used a bowl for the first couple of weeks as it was much easier to use with a small baby.

mz_jackie86 · May 28th, 2009, 18:55 PM

Hey girls,

It isnt as hard as it sounds althoug if u gotta cranky baby it can be lol!

I tend to bath/shower either at night when she in bed or in the morning when she is napping and im all on oone floor o go the loo and keep the door open lol so i can see straight into my front room, but she is either strapped into a chair or lyin on the floor on her changing mat! ANd for her bath i have a bath support which is a god send....

the hardest part is when u are so tired and they need fed or they are over tired and u need someone to take over, but like someone else said if its all u know then u are used to it!! xxx

Mummy&bump · May 31st, 2009, 15:58 PM

deffo agree with the whole if its all uv ever knowin thing! i personally havnt found it all tht difficult tbh! i just go 4 my shower when and as u used 2, i just leave keir sittin in his bouncy chair and hes quite happy! the worst thing thts going 2 happen is theyl cry but i just quickly finish what im doing then go get him, a little cry doesnt do them any harm!

Iv been on my own 4m day 1 as my ex fiance is an arse haha and i really found the hardest part was the pregnancy on ur own but really its only 9mnths 1s uv got ur little 1 u dnt care like u did when u were pregnant!

xxxx

May 20th, 2009, 19:38 PM	#11
june09 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: North East England Posts: 654	Good to read some comments from those of you who have done it alone, Thanks it's good to know that it's not as difficult as it seems and that you can manage to do the everyday things.

Status: Offline

May 21st, 2009, 16:05 PM	#12
DizzyMoo Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 5,902	There are days you might feel crap or like you're just floating through one day to the next but when you get that 1st gurgle,coo, or smile you suddenly realise that it's not that hard & the good days far outway the bad days. I think now there are plenty of benefits to being alone lol Although of course there are benefits of being with a partner too. Take each day as it comes, rest is an important thing when you get enough rest & sleep you'll find you can cope with alsorts, But feeling tired,lethargic etc & the littlest thing will tip you over the edge for that day. So take each day at a time , Within days/wks you'll wonder what all the fuss was about lol

Status: Offline

May 21st, 2009, 20:58 PM	#13
MoonMuffin Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Norwalk, CT Posts: 3,369	Well I'm not a single mom so not nearly as stressful, but my DH is working all day so I'm alone taking care of Kathryn most of the day. Things like going to pee are quick so not so bad for leaving them alone real fast, slings and carriers are great for getting stuff done around the house and If your just having one of those days, don't feel bad putting them from swing to bouncer to something else. Showers can be taken during naps or at night. I can't imagine how hard it is going it alone, but we have tough times too. Believe me its so worth it, that smile those giggles, every new thing will make it worth everything.

Status: Offline

May 22nd, 2009, 04:39 AM	#14
Freya Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: May 2008 Location: Derbyshire Posts: 2,600	I am not on my own either (so hope I'm not butting in or come across as patronising) I have so much respect for single mummys. It's hard being a mum full stop, but very VERY rewarding. Especially as they start to smile and coo.... I cant tell you how much I love my little girl because I can't quite put in words. I think as long as you have a friend or family member to give you the odd break (to sleep, have a cuppa or have relaxing bath), you can cope. I know what you mean about not wanting to leave your baby! I still struggle now!!!!!! But, you kinda get to know when it's time to have a break from her/him, because you get to recharge your batteries and come back to your baby full of enthusiasm again! xxxxx

Status: Offline

May 22nd, 2009, 04:53 AM	#15
mummyk Mum (Mom) Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 263	i wasnt entirely alone OH was there but in bed he worked solid nights and slept all day untill it was time to go to work so i do class my self as a single mum, OH then moved out when LO was 1 so then i was all alone, i coped fine you just learn as you go along i put LO in his moses basket in the bathroom he slept beside my bed (well in the bed with me most of the time ) it does get hard some times especially when they cry at night which my LO did for 5months but if there is no one there you have to cope so you do. really dont worry hun you will be fine
mummyk Mum (Mom) Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 263
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May 22nd, 2009, 06:21 AM	#16
Katieeeee Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Essex Posts: 3,426	Thankyou ladies xxxxxx

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May 25th, 2009, 06:28 AM	#17
missjacey44 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Hertfordshire Posts: 3,449	Iv looked after my son on my own from day one and to be honest i havnt found it hard at all. Only hard thing is dealing with the sleepness nights on your own and not having anybody to watch baby while you have a lay in or an hours nap in the afternoon! When it comes to bathing, I didnt buy a baby bath i got a bath support in my big bath so i dont need both hands to hold him. When he was newborn and i didnt like leaving him alone i would shower/cook/clean and all the rest of it when he was asleep which with a newborn is quite alot!! Now hes older, im happy to leave him playing where i know hes safe for 10mins while i have a quick shower ect.

Status: Offline

May 26th, 2009, 21:20 PM	#18
laura3103 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Dudley, West Mids Posts: 1,284	like someone said before if you are on your own from the start you dont know any different so you just get on with it! You learn how to do things that suit you and your baby so it becomes easier for yourself in the end. I have been on my own since i was 12 weeks pregnant and was never very maternal at all before so i thought that maybe i would struggle but i have found being a single mom easy if i have chores to do i make sure she is asleep then start knowing that i have plenty of time before she wakes up again.same again with having a shower i do that first thing in a morning before she wakes i make her bottle so its ready nice a cool for when i get out!! As for bath time buy a support its a great investment and i used a bowl for the first couple of weeks as it was much easier to use with a small baby.

Status: Offline

May 28th, 2009, 18:55 PM	#19
mz_jackie86 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: london Posts: 1,606	Hey girls, It isnt as hard as it sounds althoug if u gotta cranky baby it can be lol! I tend to bath/shower either at night when she in bed or in the morning when she is napping and im all on oone floor o go the loo and keep the door open lol so i can see straight into my front room, but she is either strapped into a chair or lyin on the floor on her changing mat! ANd for her bath i have a bath support which is a god send.... the hardest part is when u are so tired and they need fed or they are over tired and u need someone to take over, but like someone else said if its all u know then u are used to it!! xxx

Status: Offline

May 31st, 2009, 15:58 PM	#20
Mummy&bump Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Glasgow Posts: 665	deffo agree with the whole if its all uv ever knowin thing! i personally havnt found it all tht difficult tbh! i just go 4 my shower when and as u used 2, i just leave keir sittin in his bouncy chair and hes quite happy! the worst thing thts going 2 happen is theyl cry but i just quickly finish what im doing then go get him, a little cry doesnt do them any harm! Iv been on my own 4m day 1 as my ex fiance is an arse haha and i really found the hardest part was the pregnancy on ur own but really its only 9mnths 1s uv got ur little 1 u dnt care like u did when u were pregnant! xxxx

Status: Offline

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