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<![CDATA[BabyandBump - Miscarriage & Loss Support]]> http://www.babyandbump.com en Tue, 02 Dec 2008 16:07:07 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.babyandbump.com/images/bnb-v370/misc/rss.jpg <![CDATA[BabyandBump - Miscarriage & Loss Support]]> http://www.babyandbump.com this is so hard http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77592-so-hard.html Tue, 02 Dec 2008 12:10:44 GMT This is so hard, this is my first post in this section as i did not want to move here, :cry: it makes it feel even more real, I lost my little babies... This is so hard, this is my first post in this section as i did not want to move here, :cry: it makes it feel even more real, I lost my little babies last week and had an induced miscarrage on thursday/saturday, I thought thats what i wanted to feel closer to my babies i was loosing to make it seem more real, and i guess a little to punish my body to failing my beloved babies. but now i regret it so much! it feels like my body not expects there to a baby after going through 30 hours of agonising contractions, and my arms feel so empty as if wishing to hold my little babies, and i just dnt know what to do, i have managed to cope till now but today i broke down and i feel so low and i just dnt know what to do:cry: i want my babies here so desperately! :cry: i can only sleep for about 3/5 hours a nite, has any one else felt like this? ]]> yeahuloveme http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77592-so-hard.html Just got AF http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77412-just-got-af.html Mon, 01 Dec 2008 20:02:16 GMT Hi ladies Well not sure how i could start to say how i feel. Been feeling all day like i was getting very mild period pains. As have been waiting on... Hi ladies
Well not sure how i could start to say how i feel. Been feeling all day like i was getting very mild period pains. As have been waiting on first period. And tonight i got my period. I burst into tears. It just feels like its all over now. I mean i knew it was all over. But iv been so up and down the past few weeks. With xmas coming up and everything. I would have been 20weeks on the 28th dec. And due to get my scan to see what i was having.
I dont really know why i started crying. My periods different this time. Then again i suppose my bodys just trying to get back to normal. And that its normal to be different from my other periods.
Feel like my m/c never happend in a way. Now that my bodys recovering.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx:cry: ]]> Wishfull http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77412-just-got-af.html Would u mind telling me how this compares? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77399-would-u-mind-telling-me-compares.html Mon, 01 Dec 2008 19:32:51 GMT Hi my gp thinks its 50 50 if im miscarrying. I'm having a scan next week to find out.

I'm anywhere from 4 1/2 to 5 weeks pregnant.

The bleeding is light to medium i think and stress the word think it may be getting lighter, one thing for sure is it's not heavier. I had a bath and it took 45 mins for some to hit the pad, after and hour i went to the toilet and there was only a small amount in the pad but a fair bit when i wiped, it seems like it's mixed with a load of ewcm? No idea what that means, it's proper red in colour but could there be less than it looks cos of the ewcm, if anyone has an experience i would uber appreciate it. The counseller at epu said that in the majority of miscariages she wouls expect the bleeding to be a lot heavier, but everyone is different.

Not sure if i am having cramping so i guess if i have it's mild and my belly feels weird, not sure how to describe it.

I have been thro all emotions today of sheer devastation thinking it's gone to not being sure. I just want to say i'm sorry u girls have experienced miscarriages i have experinced a little of what it is like today and it is pure hell. i pray u ladies go onto have healthy pregnancies and babies very soon. I know that wont take away the pain for your loses, but u truely deserve your healthy babies :hugs: ]]> DaisyDuke http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77399-would-u-mind-telling-me-compares.html baby clothes left on desk!!!!!! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77214-baby-clothes-left-desk.html Mon, 01 Dec 2008 09:17:24 GMT How f*cking stupid can one person be??! As if having 3 preg people in my office isnt bad enough, the girl who sits next to me has baby clothes on... How f*cking stupid can one person be??!

As if having 3 preg people in my office isnt bad enough, the girl who sits next to me has baby clothes on her desk! grrrrrrr:hissy::hissy:

How ignorant can they be!! :cry::cry::cry: ]]> moomoo http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77214-baby-clothes-left-desk.html anyone gotten pregnant straight after m/c? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77202-anyone-gotten-pregnant-straight-after-m-c.html Mon, 01 Dec 2008 08:07:32 GMT just wondering if there is anyone who has gotten pregnant straight after a m/c and if they know how long after they started bleeding that they... just wondering if there is anyone who has gotten pregnant straight after a m/c and if they know how long after they started bleeding that they ovulated... me n my oh only had sex once without a condom as we decided to wait after the once time and i am starting to get the same feelings i did when i was pregnant.. im not sure if its all in my head or if it has actually happen im really confused...i know all i should do is take a test but im worried if its positive that i will have another m/c im just way to scared n worried to take a test.... i woiuld love some advice please... ]]> aaiimmee http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77202-anyone-gotten-pregnant-straight-after-m-c.html dreading mc again..feeling blue!!!!! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77112-dreading-mc-again-feeling-blue.html Sun, 30 Nov 2008 20:34:00 GMT i'm 5 wks after bfp... and kinda feel happy about it.. but why do i feel so blue....????? this is pregnancy no 4, baby no 5.....

i just feel i should be happy about it... i feel so terrified of mc again.. i feel all the other mcs have robbed of that feeling of pure joy and excitement of being pregnant.....i am so worried and the days are going so slowly till the scan on weds...

i know i should be happy... but cant seem to be... im all over the place feeling emotional and low....:cry: ]]> doc123 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/77112-dreading-mc-again-feeling-blue.html <![CDATA[The dr thinks i'm miscarying!]]> http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76984-dr-thinks-im-miscarying.html Sun, 30 Nov 2008 08:45:05 GMT So i had a little more pink cm last night, so i went to bed praying, woke up covered in sweat, and there was a little more blood, so i took a test... So i had a little more pink cm last night, so i went to bed praying, woke up covered in sweat, and there was a little more blood, so i took a test the line is so so faint now and it was the first proper fmu i have had, cos i didn't need to get up every 3 hours to go, which is a worry in its self. My cervix is also low and open. So i spoke to nhs direct and got put straight thro to the nurse, then the dr called me within 30 mins, she said it looks like i am miscarying, i'm truely heart broken. I love my bean so much and cant bear the thought of not being pregnant, i have never felt so special. I am so sorry u have all had to go thro this, it is truely awful. :cry::hugs: ]]> DaisyDuke http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76984-dr-thinks-im-miscarying.html Due Date http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76778-due-date.html Sat, 29 Nov 2008 11:11:56 GMT My baby was suppose to be here today. Miscarried in May. I'm finding it difficult right now, finding words to express my feelings, as tears are streaming down my face.

Rest in peace little one. Mommy and Daddy love you so much. xox ]]> todteach http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76778-due-date.html Just a vent http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76645-just-vent.html Fri, 28 Nov 2008 19:05:32 GMT Hello ladies Im writing tonight almost feeling like a mad woman. I dont know whats happend to my mind. I feeling like i need to scream really loudly... Hello ladies
Im writing tonight almost feeling like a mad woman. I dont know whats happend to my mind. I feeling like i need to scream really loudly or something. Or just run, run as far away from everything as i can. But to where? where i dont know.
Since my m/c 5 weeks ago things were terrible initally after it. Me and other half split up got back together. And now were closer than ever. Were even happier than weve ever been. Not because we dont have our baby. Just because weve spoke about everything an he was scared he'd lost me.
The reason I think im feeling so down and lost its because and i dont want to sound bitter but no-one speaks about my m/c, no-one. Iv had someone say "Oh you liked to eat that when you were pregnant" and lots of how are you.I still dont think iv cryed enough. The first week i did then i ended up being the strong one for people as they felt so bad. I know that people wouldnt know what to say. Also its been 5 weeks so people i suppose wont think about it. But i think about losing my baby everyday. And i suppose it will be only me who remembers every little moment of everything.
Also my oh's cousin is pregnant and im finding that really hard to be around her. I feel so bitter towards her its knew bay this an new baby that. She already had a 1 year old an every one is always aw this an aw that. I love that wee boy to bits hes lovely. But i cant stop my self thinking horrible thoughts like why cant i have my baby. I put my make-up on everyday as a mask so that i dont have to cry. I think thats when it started i mean me keeping it all in.
I feel numb, lost, cold, cruel, and i dont really like what im becoming. I can feel a change in me. Especially with xmas coming up.
Lossing my baby changed me its made me look at things differntly.
Sorry for going on just needed a moan.
xxxxxxxxx ]]> Wishfull http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76645-just-vent.html I needed to get it out.. it might help others http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76603-needed-get-out-might-help-others.html Fri, 28 Nov 2008 16:01:34 GMT Iv never told my story in full.. its always been in parts. so i thought it might help me and maybe some others reading it. so here i go.. id get a... Iv never told my story in full.. its always been in parts. so i thought it might help me and maybe some others reading it. so here i go.. id get a cuppa T first if i was you..

november 2006 it was just over a week since my 19th birthday id been with my partner 8 months, we was getting married in the january and was looking forwards to it.
on 28th november i found out i was pregnant i was terrified. i only took a test because my OH told me to. when it came back positive i paniced bit then got really excited i always wanted to be a mum. i took 2 more tests and then plucked up the courage to go tell my mum. she guessed the moment i got in :dohh: she got excited then booked me in 2 the local dr to get it registered.
when the dr had a look at me she said she found a lump and wanted me looking at.
i spent 5 hours in epau being looked at having blood took. the lump was my womb. it leaned to the right. they said i was 2 early to see anything on a scan. they sent me home and told me to come back in 48 hrs.
2 days later they repeated my blood tests then told me to go home and theyl ring with results.
5:30 on 1st december came. the day ill never forget her words.
the nurse rang and told me but my HCG levels went from 200 to 220. theyd hardly moved. she told me my baby had no chance of survival. i cryed for hours. i couldnt ring my oh to tell him about our baby.
for the following 3 weeks i was in and out of hospital as they thought i was ectopic as they cuddnt find the baby.
finally on december 25th 2006 i m/c at home in bed while my oh was away at work.
it hit me like a ton of bricks. i went from a healthy size 10 to a unhealthy size 6 and weighed just 8 stone. i got married looking like a shadow of myself. i didnt no how to cope.
i was told its normal 2 have a m/c and not 2 worry.

in april 2007 after months of getting myself back on track and back to a very healthy weight i found out i was pregnant again. i was terrified the same would happen. hubby was away again so i planned how id tell him.
when he came home i sent him a txt just as he gt outta the car
" hello daddy u havent met me yet but i live in mummys tummy all nice and warm and im dying to meet you come and rub mummys belly"

he read it and jaw hit the floor he was shocked. he was so scared to the point he pushed me away alittle. he couldnt bond properly.
at 8 weeks i had a scan due to bleeding. my oh watched our little 1s heart beat away on the screen it was amazing he couldnt stop watching. i was so happy. he was leaving that day to go away 6 months. he took a pic of our baby to remind him what wed made.
2 weeks later on april 2007 i bled. i knew then my baby had died. my mum rushed me in to hospital and watched the screen as they scanned for the baby. i layed there sobbing i refused to look at the screen. my mum took one look and burst in to tears. i new my precious baby had died.
once again i was back down there again the place i didnt want to go. i opted to m/c naturally. that night i passed our baby on the loo bleeding so much. i was in so much pain my dad had to carry me to my room.
i couldnt get hold of my OH. 2 weeks later when he rang i broke the news to him. he said he had to go. but i received a msg from a friend that her husband had said my OH was in peices. something even to this day iv never seen him break down.
i didnt no how to cope. it killed me.

it took me time to get over losing our baby, in december 2007 we desided we was going to try again. we was desparate for a baby. on january 7th 2008 the day after our first wedding anniversary someone answered our prayers. 2 line showed up on a test. for some reason i couldnt get excited i didnt feel right. i took another test a week later. it was negative then i bled.
i went to see my gp and was told my pregnancy was chemical.
i new it... we desided no more. not untill wed moved and was settled.

in march 2008 we moved house, we desided to try again. in may i was feeling very sick bad dreams every sympton you can think of. so i took a test. OMG it was positive but this time i was full of symptoms i had so many good feelings. so did OH. we registered the pregnancy and got 2 scans in. our baby was growing so well the heart was strong. id had my appointment with my m/w. wed started buying books talking about names. we was convinced we was having a boy. we wanted to call him either kyran or daniel. OH constantly rubbed my tummy. at 10 weeks i told my m/w i was in discomfort she told me i worry to much and the pains are just my uterous moving.
that night i felt a movement next thing i new my nickers were wet like id wet myself. there was alot of mucus.
OH rushed me to hospital, i was convinced baby was fine as my symptoms were still there.
they did a test and put me in the waiting room. they came out with a wheelchair. it was for me. i paniced.
they took me for a scan. because i was 10 weeks they could do a external scan. but they couldnt see him. i new then it was over i shook as he did the internal and confirmed the heart wasnt beating anf the baby died at 7 weeks.
they had me in 2 days later for a D&C as they wanted the baby to test on. i was going to be having all tests to see why id lost 4 pregnancys/
on the monday i was admitted and shown to a private room. i was told id be in thetre by 5 they prepped me at 3. i had dilation tablets to open my cervix and 2 bring on a state of labour.
7pm came and no thetre.. the pains were fast and long i was in agony i stood up to walk around and woosh.. i felt all movemnt. i had to pass my baby and all the contents of my womb in to a bed pan. id lost so much blood and because i was nil by mouth i passed out for a few seconds.
i was taken for a scan at 9pm to check if id passed everything. i had passed all but a few blood clots. i was kept in all night and given 6 more tablets.
i left hospital june 22nd in peices. a bitter nasty woman that no pregnant lady should have spoken to.
i hated everyone who spoke to me or told me not to worry.

i had extensive tests for 3 months. finally iv been told i have a problem called translocation of the chomosome. i dont no how i can be helped or if ill ever have a child but i no if i had a child naturally without helo the chances of a abnormal child is very very high.
i have a little book with all my scans in from 3 of my 4 pregnancys. ill never forget my angels and never forget the fight iv had to try keep my babies.

thats my story im sorry is so long.. i cryed as i wrote it but its good to get it out. i hope it can help people realise no matter how hard it looks at the time it does get easier. ]]> Tracie87 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76603-needed-get-out-might-help-others.html i dont know how to feel http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76528-dont-know-feel.html Fri, 28 Nov 2008 11:19:04 GMT After my miscarriage on tuesday i have (as you can imagine) been through the mix of emotions but now i dont know how i should be feeling. I was 5... After my miscarriage on tuesday i have (as you can imagine) been through the mix of emotions but now i dont know how i should be feeling. I was 5 weeks but didnt know i was pregnant so it feels like some people are thinking i shouldnt be so upset about it but i am beside myself. I dont know how i feel about having sex again and i dont know how i feel about wanting a baby again yet even though this is what i want more than anything. Its horrible. I suppose its just the grief i have been through but i am all over the place. Thank you for reading this XXX ]]> beetlebailey http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76528-dont-know-feel.html 2 years... http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76525-2-years.html Fri, 28 Nov 2008 11:10:52 GMT If someone had told me 2 years ago i would have felt all this pain and hurt i think i may have just hid away under a rock and not come out. 2 years... If someone had told me 2 years ago i would have felt all this pain and hurt i think i may have just hid away under a rock and not come out.
2 years ago today i found out i was pregnant for the very first time. So many emotions went through my head. i had always wanted to be a mum. somethings aint ment to be.
This is why i hate xmas time more than anything.

December 25th 2006
we said goodbye to our angel. i m/c on xmas day.

December 6th 2007
our little miricle should have been born, but m/c at 8 weeks april 2007

january 7th 2008
we lost our 3rd baby!

january 18th 2009
this was the EDD of the child that was ment to be. i carried bubba for 10 weeks only to find out we lost him at 7

Now i have the weight of when can i be treated for my chromosome problem. december 16th ill find out.

why is it xmas is such a bad time for me!! ]]> Tracie87 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76525-2-years.html Terrible :( http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76463-terrible.html Fri, 28 Nov 2008 01:49:14 GMT I think my sister has had a mis-carriage and if she has I don't know what to say to her . . . I have been thinking about it all day and night, I got a text after seeing the midwife that she was bleeding and I had been happy because I had heard the beans heartbeat for the first time and that text was like a sobering smack in the face and I felt really guilty.

I don't know the whole story as she lives miles away, but she went to the hospital and was sent home, don't know what they did or saw, but she was clotting a while later and had to go back, but I don't know what is happening and feel so useless . . .

What can I even say to help? It is just so unfair, I was so excited for her and now it's over I feel awful and cant stop crying.

Thanks for reading, had to get it off my chest, I feel so bad. :cry: ]]> fairywings http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76463-terrible.html My miscarriage story http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76121-my-miscarriage-story.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 22:41:50 GMT Well i came off the injection about a year back and have been waiting for then to get my periods back. They started again in September and me and... Well i came off the injection about a year back and have been waiting for then to get my periods back. They started again in September and me and hubby was really happy as meant we could start TTC.
We had been trying and i had been reading books on fertility and best ways to get pregnant etc, nothing the first month but this month was different. i was due on 16th of Novemeber but had nothing. However i did start feeling "strange" i was having classic pregnant symptoms so i took a test and it was negative, i tested every 48 hours but was getting negatives.
On friday i went to the toilet and when i wiped there was blood, i thought it was the start of my period, sat morning i had come on but i was really really heavy and i was in so much pain. This continued sunday and monday and the bleeding was the heaviest i have ever been. Monday night i was doubled over with pain and couldnt sleep. I eventually fell off to sleep but when i woke about 9am i went to the toilet and i had passed as what i can only describe as a bean shaped clot, i booked an appointment at the doc and i went and they confirmed i had miscarried. I was heartbroken especially as i didnt know i was pregnant. It is so upsetting and so heartwrenching. I feel empty.
Hubby has been a tower of strength. The bleeding and pains have now eased off but still sore.
I was 5 weeks. Its been a saviour being able to come on here and express my feelings, so thank you.
:hug: to you all XXX ]]> beetlebailey http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76121-my-miscarriage-story.html Saw sac and yolk sac at 5 weeks but I am still bleeding brown! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76097-saw-sac-yolk-sac-5-weeks-but-am-still-bleeding-brown.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 20:54:54 GMT Hi ladies First off, I would like to say that I am so sorry fpr your losses, I had a read at some of your threads and I really feel for you all. I... Hi ladies

First off, I would like to say that I am so sorry fpr your losses, I had a read at some of your threads and I really feel for you all.

I am writing as I am 6 wks pregnant and I went to EPAU on Monday for a scan after having brown bleeding. The scan showed the sac and yolk sac but no HB as too early. I am going back on Monday.

However, I am still bleeding brown but have no pain. Have any of you had a similar experience with your miscarriages? I have heard a lot from the ladies who have had brown bleeding and things have been fine but I would like to know your thoughts on the matter too.

Thanks xx :hug: ]]> whitelilly http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76097-saw-sac-yolk-sac-5-weeks-but-am-still-bleeding-brown.html has anyone else been treated with methotrexate??? HELP http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76083-has-anyone-else-been-treated-methotrexate-help.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 20:05:40 GMT Hi everyone, As said in my previous thread i was treated with methotrexate on Tuesday 18/11 for an asymptomatic suspected ectopic pregnancy. The... Hi everyone,
As said in my previous thread i was treated with methotrexate on Tuesday 18/11 for an asymptomatic suspected ectopic pregnancy. The guidelines say they expect that in the first week after having it your hcg levels will rise, i had a blood test fri 21/11 and my levels had gone up, i had another test mon 24/11 (this was the seventh day) and they had only decreased slightly.
as a result they want me to have another treatment tomorrow 27/11. i dont want to do this as it means i have to wait 6 months instead of 3 months to ttc. i have asked if they could test my blood once more before i have the second injection and they have refused.:hissy:

anyone else had this happen to them? ]]> rabbit http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/76083-has-anyone-else-been-treated-methotrexate-help.html what is going on?.....scared! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75920-going-scared.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:52:42 GMT well hi ladies and before i start thank u very much for reading this..... last friday me and OH got our :bfp: for our 3rd child which is... well hi ladies and before i start thank u very much for reading this.....
last friday me and OH got our :bfp: for our 3rd child which is fantastic.....until this morning when i started to bleed fresh blood but very light but what is weird is i have no pain at all apart from the usual lower back ache which i always have in early pregnancy, im waiting for a doc to ring me back at home now im so scared im losing my bean and am so confused, im sending my 10 month old daughter to her nans for the day as she is really active and i feel i should have the day to rest, any advice ladies or thoughts on what is going on if u have had this yourself pls tll me your experiance good or bad thanks u again and hope all of u are doing well x x:sad1:

also i am around the 4-5 weeks mark should have said x x ]]> Charliemarina http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75920-going-scared.html is this my af http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75701-my-af.html Tue, 25 Nov 2008 16:18:51 GMT ok welli stopped bleeding last wednesday from my m/c and yesterday i got some stabbing like pains very low down,well this morning i started bleeding... ok welli stopped bleeding last wednesday from my m/c and yesterday i got some stabbing like pains very low down,well this morning i started bleeding new blood( sorry tmi) very very light so is this my af or still my m/c ?

:hug::hug: ]]> becky77 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75701-my-af.html Early signs of miscarriage http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75603-early-signs-miscarriage.html Tue, 25 Nov 2008 10:56:16 GMT Hello, im new to this forum and the reason i have registered is i think i have had a very early miscarriage. Basically i was a week late but was... Hello, im new to this forum and the reason i have registered is i think i have had a very early miscarriage. Basically i was a week late but was getting negative tests, i then "came on" on saturday but i was really, really heavy and in a lot of pain. Didnt really think much of it, jus assumed it was a heavy period. Well gradually the pains got worse and then they went again. Bleeding was still heavy and i was changing my pads a lot more regular. Last night i was in severe pain and had to get up as i was so uncomforatble. I went to the toilet and i had had a very heavy bleed so i changed my pad and went back to bed but couldnt get back to sleep coz of the pain and discomfort i was in. I manged to get back off to sleep eventually but when i woke i had passed a very heavy clot and it was (what i can only describe as) bean shape. The pain has eased now and the bleeding not as heavy but i have booked an appointment with my GP. I have kep the clot but should i take it with me? Do you think it is a miscarriage or not? I dont even know if my doc can do anything or not.
Thank you for reading this. X ]]> beetlebailey http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75603-early-signs-miscarriage.html Tomorrow would have been my due date! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75468-tomorrow-would-have-been-my-due-date.html Mon, 24 Nov 2008 20:49:01 GMT Well the day I have been dreading has arrived and I feel upset even thinking about it. Tomorrow was my due date from the baby I lost in May. I joined... Well the day I have been dreading has arrived and I feel upset even thinking about it. Tomorrow was my due date from the baby I lost in May. I joined this site after that and found some great support and people to talk to who understood what I was saying and how I was feeling. Thanks to everyone and I hope that tomorrow passes pretty uneventfully for me! I know I will be thinking lots of that little bundle and telling the baby I am carrying all about their older sibling that didn't get to stay on earth.

Thanks for reading ladies xxx ]]> Logiebear http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75468-tomorrow-would-have-been-my-due-date.html Im scared..Update! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75291-im-scared-update.html Mon, 24 Nov 2008 13:02:59 GMT Hi I dont post much here, but really needing some advice, for the last week I have been showing signs of prgnancy, having been pregnant once before... Hi I dont post much here, but really needing some advice, for the last week I have been showing signs of prgnancy, having been pregnant once before It was to similar, any way I knew I had to test to make sure, so Ill try and explain best I can Im not sure which section to put this in so hope its ok here?
I went to visit a friend on saturday n she asked how the TTC was going, I said to her about it and that I hadnt tested yet as I had no hpt but someone I kknow was sendin a couple so i could test next week, after calling me a daft nit she said she had a spare (I didnt even rlise she was trying, turns out its from a couple yrs bac lol!) anyhoos she brought it out and said right missy go pee! 15 mmins later, we could be found peering really closly as we wathced a very faint + lne appeard, grinning, she said cool, so when those others come through you can test with hubby and the line should be a lot stronger!!! beaming I wondered how I was gonna keep me mouth shut!
that evening back at home I started getting servere stomach cramps, thinkin it was my cooking, I curled up and tried to sleep but it was really hurting, so took a hot shower, next morning (sunday) I got up still acheing when about an hour later I realised I was bleeding really heavily, assuming the test day before was wrong I tell hubby my af has shown.
Ok tis may be a tmi warning here!
Normally my AF starts as a light thing for couple days then comes on really heavy then slowly tails off for couple days, and its light nornal blood!
This is totall different now, as said when I came on it was really heavy, the bloods dark and its lumpy/clotted (for want of a better word) the first time I realised I though oo eggs(sorry!) out early but when I changed pad again a couple hours later I realised it was still that way and was till a couple hours ago, my stomach ache is horrendus still and I dont know what the fook going on, I feel totally drained and like I wana throw up but cant!

What Im scared about is, when I had a operation on the 13th Nov the nurse before she knocked me out said, you do realise if your pregnant the general anaesthetic could make you miscarry

Hubby said to me after wards, oh well if you are then it dont matter if you do, as it will show we can do it we will just try again! Not thinkin much of it I brushed his comments off!

So im sat here now in pain and feeling really scared and unable to talk to him about it, I know he will tell me not to make a fuss and deal with it, I ahve been talkin to my sister on msn all morning as she has suffered m/c and she said see a doc, I keep puttin it off as I dont want to make a fuss about nothing, but as she says its your body and you wil know if its not right, but I dont want to be wasteing anyones time ni case its just a silly AF and the test was wrong!

Im sorry for waffling on but Im really confused, lost and unsure, Help?! ]]> star-dust http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75291-im-scared-update.html Limbo is a very sad place to be... http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75202-limbo-very-sad-place.html Mon, 24 Nov 2008 04:58:34 GMT If you remember me, I'm the annoying one that kept posting about how long spotting has been going on since I had my miscarriage in Sept. I bled and spotted for a full 8 weeks before it finally stopped last week. Well, if I had a period in late October (wasn't sure if it was...since it was so light)... then my period should have come last Friday for November. It hasn't come yet. I have a pretty solid 28 day cycle.

I haven't had a period at all this month. I'm not pregnant either. I'm in limbo. Have no idea where in my cycle I am, when I have or will ovulate, when I can try again. I'm so sad right now. My last miscarriage wasn't like this. Normal period came back right away.

Even worst, my sister in law whose baby just turned 1 is pregnant again with #2. She had a m/c before the first born... and we sort of shared our m/c experiences... then I moved on - got pregnant, and then m/c'ed again. Now she's pregnant.

Just so sad that I'm not going anywhere and every day seems like a month. ]]> charliesmom http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75202-limbo-very-sad-place.html methotrexate http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75042-methotrexate.html Sun, 23 Nov 2008 15:41:01 GMT hi, i've recently been treated with methotrexate for what the hospital believed (they weren't entirely sure!) was an ectopic pregnancy. Has anyone else been treated with this? How did you find it? How long did you wait to ttc again as i am getting mixed information, thanks:confused: ]]> rabbit http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/75042-methotrexate.html Im so angry http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74932-im-so-angry.html Sat, 22 Nov 2008 22:37:09 GMT Hello ladies Im so angry at the world. Iv been snapping at my OH and people who have done nothing wrong. They look at me like im crazy which i most... Hello ladies

Im so angry at the world. Iv been snapping at my OH and people who have done nothing wrong. They look at me like im crazy which i most possibly am these days. I had m/c 23rd oct. And its only now im getting angry. OH wasnt there for me at all through the pregnancy or the m/c.

I hate the world. Why would anyone allow such a thing to happen. I want my baby. I should be 15 weeks tomo. I try my very hardest to not think of things like how far i should be along and i also try my hardest not to think about my baby. Though i do every day. I have the worst nightmares.
I cant forgive myself for when i was having the m/c that after seeing my baby i flushed. I didnt know what to do i was alone and in shock and didnt really comprehend what i was doing. Now i still dont know what i would have done with the baby. I hate myself my life and everything.

Sorry for ranting and sounding like im a cold hearted person. But its just all catching up with me. I know that being angry is a part of the greiving. But it still doesnt fill the whole in my life or stop the pain in my heart.

Take care ladies hope you are all well.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx ]]> Wishfull http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74932-im-so-angry.html next af when ?? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74868-next-af.html Sat, 22 Nov 2008 17:57:44 GMT Hi just a quick question i know they you should get your af between 4-7 weeks after a m/c ,but is that from when it startrs or when it ends mine went... Hi just a quick question i know they you should get your af between 4-7 weeks after a m/c ,but is that from when it startrs or when it ends mine went on for 3 weeks so do i expect af 4-7 weeks from the start or when it ended.
sorry if this is an obvious one .

also just found out my neice is pregnant and although i am very pleased for her ,it has made me sad, and now i feel selfish for thinking like this .


:hug::hug::hug:

hope your all taking care of yourselves ladies

xx ]]> becky77 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74868-next-af.html Pls advise. 2M/Cs?? - What to do? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74763-pls-advise-2m-cs-do.html Sat, 22 Nov 2008 08:58:34 GMT Dear all,

I'd like some advice and opinions from those who have had the same experience :

I started TTC in June 2008, and got a BFP in Aug. The HPT was positive twice during the next week. However, I started having just little smears of brown spots for a few days. I thought they were just breakthrough bleeding. Then I started having cramps on and off. Three days later, the brownish discharges (looked like old blood) were starting to increase so much that I had to use pads like I was having a normal period. I was 5W3Days along. AFter the abnormal bleeding stopped, I did another HPT and it was negative.

I rested in Sept for one cycle, then TTC again. I got a BHP in October. Wow!!... I was so happy, but I didnt tell ANYONE about my positives. Somehow I was so sure deep inside that I should wait until I am at least past the 8W mark before telling anyone, coz I'm sure that I'd die if I were to have to suffer the kind pity and sympathy which will always remind me of my loss and make me feel like an inadequate/incompetent female (infertile and unable to bear children).

My 2nd BB lived a short life. I got my BHP at exactly W4, and one week again I was bleeding. MC started with little cramps which came on and off. I convinced myself its normal and baby is implanting and uterus is growing, etc etc..... Cramping got more severe within 5 days, followed by heavy 'period-like' bleeding with lots of little clots. I refused to take painkiller to soothe the cramps that came with the bleeding. I just let it happen to me, being very sorry that I couldnt hold on to my BB, and that I deserved the pain.

I'm now in my first cycle after my 2nd MC and I'm already TTC (can you believe it?) I'm not stopping this time. I feel empty inside. I've bought my maternity dresses and bras for my 1st and 2nd trimester. Oh gosh... I cant tell anyone about my 2MC. So thank God for this forum.... and thank god for BnB for letting me get it all out (sorry for long post).

Big question now - I havent seen a doctor after my two MC (5W3D and 5W). I'm scared. Should I have seen a doctor?? Do I need a scan?? I'm scared of having to go through a D&C. I'm worried coz I think I can be pregnant again this cycle and I dont want to compromise any (potential) pregnancy.

What do I do ????? ]]> Lotus77 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74763-pls-advise-2m-cs-do.html Dr confirmed... http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74712-dr-confirmed.html Fri, 21 Nov 2008 22:40:30 GMT Well, I had my much anticipated appointment with the Dr today...

I had another miscarriage. :(
It's hitting me harder today then it has this entire time... *sigh*:cry:

I don't understand!!:hissy:

So... I've got to take antibiotics for a week, same with Hubs... something to do with vaginosis or some shit? I dunno, but to clear it up...
THEN have a pap done in 6-8 weeks time..

and, I've decided to go back on the pill, even just for 2 months... that way it gives my body a chance to heal itself, and then we can try again properly. like we did the first time.

*sigh*
Just been a very long emotional and heartbreaking road these last few months...

Hopefully onward and upward. ]]> krockwell http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74712-dr-confirmed.html Between a rock and a deathly hard place! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74681-between-rock-deathly-hard-place.html Fri, 21 Nov 2008 20:49:58 GMT God what should I do...........? My close friend Laura, whom I have known for over 20 years has just been given some devastating news. She is nearly... God what should I do...........?

My close friend Laura, whom I have known for over 20 years has just been given some devastating news. She is nearly 6 months pregnant and a scan has just revealed that her beautiful daughter has a serious heart defect. Her heart has only developed three chambers when it should have 4.

Laura has been told that she has 2 options...to either terminate the pregnancy....or carry her to full term and if she survives 2 days after birth (of which the chances are very slim), pray that a heart is available for transplant.

I love my friend very much and will support her every step of the way....sometimes life does not make any sense and is overly cruel. I believe in God and can understand why some find it hard to believe in his existence, especially under circumstances such as this.

What a decision to have to make!
How on earth would you decide such a fate!
I can only listen....what am I to do?

I couldn't even begin to understand how she may be feeling right now!

Yearning.x ]]> Yearning http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74681-between-rock-deathly-hard-place.html anybody there??? with this http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74620-anybody-there.html Fri, 21 Nov 2008 17:34:46 GMT hello, ladies.. am told am positive for Anti-cardiolipin antibody.... :cry: anyone else with me???? hello,
ladies.. am told am positive for Anti-cardiolipin antibody.... :cry:

anyone else with me???? ]]> keerthy http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74620-anybody-there.html How many more? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74565-many-more.html Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:31:21 GMT I don't know why i am even writing anymore. I have now had 7 miscarriages and I don't think i can cope anymore.
I am taking aspirin and a double dose of folic acid every day. I don't know when i want to start trying again. I now hate being pregnant because i then stop going to the toilet for fear of what i will find and i feel so fragile I just want to lie down for 40 weeks. Will it ever end? Will i ever have another baby? I am now 35 and time is running out. ]]> logie68 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74565-many-more.html Question on Cycle Lengths after MC http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74557-question-cycle-lengths-after-mc.html Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:16:01 GMT Hi ladies I just wondered if any of you have had cycle lengths change after m/c? My usual cycle is around 34 days, but these past few days my... Hi ladies

I just wondered if any of you have had cycle lengths change after m/c?

My usual cycle is around 34 days, but these past few days my temps have been high so I wondered if I may have ovulated early, resulting in a 28 day cycle this month.

But i've also had a cold which could be the reason for high temps. I will wait and see what happens.

Thanks

Kelly

http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/228a89 ]]> xxKelxx http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74557-question-cycle-lengths-after-mc.html 4 Weeks after miscarriage, feel sick, and in slight pain... http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74424-4-weeks-after-miscarriage-feel-sick-slight-pain.html Thu, 20 Nov 2008 22:30:28 GMT Hello I posted on here a little while a go as Sugababy but lost my log in details then it wouldnt let me change my password!! I had a miscarriage... Hello

I posted on here a little while a go as Sugababy but lost my log in details then it wouldnt let me change my password!! I had a miscarriage exactly 4 weeks a go and had scan to confirm baby had gone, i was 7 weeks 6 days when the miscarriage occurred. Anyway this week Im fairly nauseus, getting slight pains in my stomach and just feel generally weird. I am waiting for my next period before I then go back on the pill as we are not trying to conceive. Its not period type pains Im getting though just generally achey like I felt before I miscarried. Has anyone else had similar experiences??

Thanks for any help ]]> LilyPie http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74424-4-weeks-after-miscarriage-feel-sick-slight-pain.html Suffered A Miscarriage Back In August http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74390-suffered-miscarriage-back-august.html Thu, 20 Nov 2008 20:46:24 GMT Hi all,

It's been such a long time since I visited this website but for some reason I have finally found the courage to come back this evening and see how everyone is doing. The last time I posted a message on this site was back at the very end of July, when I had been for an early scan. Things didn't look too good and I'm sad to say that I did in fact suffer a miscarriage:cry:

Is it normal to need this amount of time before you can actually start to talk about it because up until now I've just tried to put the whole experience to the back of my mind and pretend it never happened? ]]> emmad339 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74390-suffered-miscarriage-back-august.html Help! I think I had a miscarriage last night! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74349-help-think-had-miscarriage-last-night.html Thu, 20 Nov 2008 18:35:47 GMT I had gone to the doctor only two days ago to get a blood test to confirm pregnancy even though my expected period had shown, but was so very light... I had gone to the doctor only two days ago to get a blood test to confirm pregnancy even though my expected period had shown, but was so very light it was more of a spotting than anything (Usually I have heavy periods.. have never had a light one before). The spotting started on Friday.. today is Thursday. The test came back showing I had elevated HCG and we were going to do three more tests over the next week to make sure it was going up like it should. She said the levels were elevated, but not enough for her to 100% confirm that I was pregnant (I think she was worried I may have a miscarriage).

So, last night I was laying in the back of our car when my husband was working on it when I got this bad cramp. I never thought anything of it, and thought it was just my body readjusting to what was going on inside of me.

The following may have too much information for some people- turn back now!!

We got home a few hours later and I went to change my tampon (I was using them for the very light spotting) and I had thick clot-like blood. I removed the tampon, and it was completely covered in this thick mucous-y dark blood. It had only been about three hours since I last changed it, so this came as a shock.

I started thinking as I laid down for bed that I may have ad a miscarriage because I was getting some bad cramping. I finally fell asleep to wake up to blood between my upper thighs. My tampon was once again covered in the same thing. I had lower abdominal cramps and a slight lower back ache. I have no urge to eat anything, and my breasts are no longer as super-sensitive and tender as they have been.

I would have only been at the 4ish week point..and my pregnancy was not 100% confirmed yet until I do three more blood tests over the next week . . . . . What do I do?!?!?!! ]]> Essence http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74349-help-think-had-miscarriage-last-night.html help me http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74285-help-me.html Thu, 20 Nov 2008 15:22:02 GMT Hi all 3weeks since my m/c and i went for my checkup all has cleared and thats good but they descuved i have polycystic overies and neva told me much... Hi all 3weeks since my m/c and i went for my checkup all has cleared and thats good but they descuved i have polycystic overies and neva told me much about it, can i have babies in the future? its weird bcoz before i became pregnant i was having regular monthy periods, the doctor told me i would still be able to have children but the internet says i cant the doctor says it might take me longer to get pregnant but i never struggled the first time has anyone else got polycystic overies and can advice me? i desperatly want another chid

xxxxxxxxxx ]]> mjbazz http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74285-help-me.html Finding it really tough http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74258-finding-really-tough.html Thu, 20 Nov 2008 14:20:42 GMT I'm just feeling so fed up, its my baby girls 1st birthday next week and i miss her so much :cry: I cant be bothered with anything at the moment and if i could would just stay in bed all day. I cant even drown my sorrows as im 11 weeks pregnant. Lifes so unfair, I just want her back. ]]> LoraLoo http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74258-finding-really-tough.html Having a breakdown http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74143-having-breakdown.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 23:53:27 GMT Well here I am sitting at my computer bawling my eyes out. I just feel so sad and so lonely. Shawn is at work until 1130pm. After reading "parkers story" I began to think about my own life and how we are TTC and how I should have been just about ready to give birth. Stupid me I decided to look at the calendar and count the days until my EDD...18 days. 18 days until I would have been holding my baby girl in my arms, 18 days until I could have seen Shawn with our beautiful baby girl being the perfect daddy I know he would have been. I cant believe how quickly it crept up. I cant believe I have to be sitting here crying about it now. I just want my baby. I just want to be happy. Christmas is going to be hard this year, just because her due date is coming up and I should have been spending christmas with my new little family. I usually say I dont like Christmas and not Im not excited about it coming up but usually as it gets closer and I get my shopping done my christmas spirit shows up. I just really dont know if it will this year. How can I be happy when its all I can think about. I hate feeling like this. I want it to go away. I think the weather is driving me to be a little emotional (hopefully its pregnancy hormones too) I hate snow...I hate winter, and here I am sitting here in the dark writing on bnb crying my eyes out while it blizzards outside and my husband is stuck at work where I have to worry about him driving home at 1130pm in this mess. I really hope I am pregnant right now, I hope that if I am it will help with dealing with my due date coming up and dealing with christmas. I will have something to look forward to, to be happy about.
Thanks for listening if you read it...no need to reply. I just needed to get some stuff off my chest and it always feels better to write how you feel out. Now Im gonna go curl up on the couch, watch days of our lives and eat chewy cookies. xx ]]> wantababybump http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74143-having-breakdown.html 8 weeks today - and it is hurting even more http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74105-8-weeks-today-hurting-even-more.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 21:25:51 GMT It is 8 weeks today since I lost my litte one. I thought I was doing ok until this week. So far I have had a huge row with DH, heard a friend is... It is 8 weeks today since I lost my litte one. I thought I was doing ok until this week. So far I have had a huge row with DH, heard a friend is pregnant, her due date is 2 days after my 'bubble' was due and she was to scared to tell me. I then hear another friend has just found out she is pregnant. And to top it all I have to work the ante natal clinic tomorrow:cry:

Whilst I have to gorgeous children and I know that I am very lucky - it has just bought all the pain to the surface and made me realise how much I wanted and 'want' my baby right now. I thought it would get better but right now it is hurting more than ever.:cry: ]]> misstrouble http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74105-8-weeks-today-hurting-even-more.html A short and sweet life http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74070-short-sweet-life.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 19:50:41 GMT I lost my angel on Sunday evening at 9:30. It was an awful experience but I am getting through it and am now able to come back and tell my... I lost my angel on Sunday evening at 9:30. It was an awful experience but I am getting through it and am now able to come back and tell my story.

On Sunday morning I noticed that I had some blood in my CM. It was very faint and I tried not to worry, remembering that some spotting is a common occurance in many pregnancies. By 2:00 that afternoon I had bright red bleeding, but it wasn't heavy like a period so I prayed and hoped it would be okay. We had 13 family members over for dinner that evening (a pleasant distraction, despite talk of what colour we would choose for the nursery) and then when I left I went upstairs to check.

I found the embryo, fully intact and still in its sac. I was 6w3d and there was no mistaking what had happened. I lost my baby.

My husband was an incredible source of strength for me and continues to be. I have never felt so devastated or helpless. He held me as I sat on the closet floor and sobbed. He helped me make decisions like whether we should go to the hospital or not and did anything I asked. We were at the hospital until 2:00 a.m. after the miscarriage had been confirmed.

We both took Monday off of work and spent the day at home, grieving and just being there. He was back to work on Tuesday. I intended to do so as well but couldn't fall asleep that night - the silence was deafening and I could only think about what had happened and cry. So at 4:30 I called my boss and told him I needed one more day.

Last night my husband took me to see Madagascar 2 at the theatre, which was really funny and it felt good to laugh. I am back at school today (I am a high school teacher) and although the kids & staff keep asking where I was, it's good to be back. It has been a tough day and I have had to swallow more than a few tears, but staying home longer wouldn't have helped.

I will always miss my baby - it was my first pregnancy and I will treasure every moment of it. We will try again in 2-3 months.

:sad1: ]]> Sash13 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74070-short-sweet-life.html my due date was today http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74036-my-due-date-today.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 17:58:55 GMT hi not sure what to say but....just that my Angel was born sleeping 10yrs ago now,but I still think about him. I was 38 wks when he... hi not sure what to say but....just that my Angel was born sleeping
10yrs ago now,but I still think about him. I was 38 wks when he died..........
it seems such along time ago now,but like it was just yesterday...I have been blessed with 3 beautiful children now life is complete.It is really hard now but time is a great healer,I would not have believed it at the time,but its true...:cry: ]]> emie http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74036-my-due-date-today.html yet another person having a baby in my dept!! http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74006-yet-another-person-having-baby-my-dept.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 16:24:31 GMT Hi girls.. its been nearly 6 weeks since my m/c and i thought i was doing ok..but recently i seem to be feeling very sad and depressed. I sit next to... Hi girls.. its been nearly 6 weeks since my m/c and i thought i was doing ok..but recently i seem to be feeling very sad and depressed. I sit next to a girl at work who is 18 weeks pregnant and she constantly talks about her pregnancy..i can just about deal with this. Then another girl at work (who had an abortion only 3 months ago anounces shes pregnant.

Today a man at work announced that his wife is preg and her due date is 2 days after mine.

Im absolutely gutted..i wanna be happy for them but im finding it so hard, especially as its all so directly in my face. I could cope so much better if half of my dept wasnt preg.

I feel as though im becoming a bitter and jealous person, and im not like that at all. I keep on thinking why me.. out of all the people close to me that are preg (about 5) why was it me..they have had kids before...you never expect to lose your first baby, but yet i do. Surely we could not have any more bad luck this year?

:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry: ]]> moomoo http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/74006-yet-another-person-having-baby-my-dept.html Due date tomorrow ... http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73962-due-date-tomorrow.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 14:35:47 GMT Well Jayden would have been Due tomorrow , And im so distraught , all i do is cry , he should be here with me now , and he's not ! Its actually killing me ! i actually feel guilty for being pregnant again so soon . Its only been 4 months since i lost him and now i feel like ive rushed into things . i know when this baby comes i will love Her or him more then life itself , but right now i dont want another baby , i just want my little boy back :cry::cry::cry::cry:

I know i sound irrational , Its just such a difficult time at the moment !

Has any of you reached your 'should of been'-due dates , and how did you get through it ? ]]> Jodie__x http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73962-due-date-tomorrow.html Questions http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73916-questions.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 11:47:17 GMT how long did it take those ladies who have had m/c and had d&Cs to conceive again? I am worried it will take longer this time as I have had this operation and it may have hindered things.

Also, I am having blood tests next week to find why I keep miscarrying. Has anyone had this? If they cannot find anything wrong with the bloods, then I will be referred to a gyno. Anyone had experience of this?

Sorry for stacks of questions xxx ]]> Rumpskin http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73916-questions.html Hurting so bad right now http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73838-hurting-so-bad-right-now.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 02:41:20 GMT Today, I decided to name my lost babies. I really wanted Rob to help me, but, he seemed not very interested, but at the same time, OK that I did. ... Today, I decided to name my lost babies. I really wanted Rob to help me, but, he seemed not very interested, but at the same time, OK that I did. So I did:
Kai (2007)
Ava (2007)
Brett & Claire (twins: Oct 2008 )

I told him tonight that I named the babies. He didn't ask the names. So, I said, "don't you even want to know their names?" He was like, "Tina, those things meant nothing to me." "I had no connection at all."

I can't tell you what a stab in the heart that was. "Those things". Could that be anymore cruel. OK, so maybe this is the bitter hard truth, but, why would he say that to me??? THese we my babies...our babies. I thought of them as my kids...I imagined them. To him, they are "things". The sad part is...I thought he cared, I thought he was hurting. It's all just an act.

But, I got over it. I did. But, then he started picking on me. I said I would vacuum while he bathed the kids. He said, "aren't you bathing the kids, I did it yesterday?" I said no. He then said, "why don't you just say you don't want to?" I said, "I said no, doesn't that mean the same thing." Then he was doing this weird smiling and argueing with me, saying "do you wanna go?" WTF? I feel so alone right now. Why is he being so cruel. Is he trying to hurt me??? Now he is blaming me. He went for a walk with the kids. I didn't come because I don't even want to see him right now.:cry: ]]> JASMAK http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73838-hurting-so-bad-right-now.html Words? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73685-words.html Tue, 18 Nov 2008 16:56:48 GMT Cannot even begin to comprehend your losses. The only support I can offer you tremendous ladies is this Angel - Sarah... Cannot even begin to comprehend your losses.

The only support I can offer you tremendous ladies is this

Angel - Sarah McLachlan
http://www.metrolyrics.com/angel-lyr...mclachlan.html

The words that soothed a close friend of mine, I hope offers yu all some peace and comfort xxxxx

:hug::hugs::hug::hugs::hug::hugs::hug::hugs::hug::hugs: ]]> natthecat http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73685-words.html Tender boobs and tummy pains http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73435-tender-boobs-tummy-pains.html Mon, 17 Nov 2008 20:54:57 GMT Today i had it cofirmed that it was my second MC i had, and i was just wondering should my boobs still be tender and i get a bit of pain now and... Today i had it cofirmed that it was my second MC i had, and i was just wondering should my boobs still be tender and i get a bit of pain now and again in my side of my tummy...

Is that normal? ]]> puddytat http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73435-tender-boobs-tummy-pains.html <![CDATA[Just when I think I'm doing good..]]> http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73207-just-think-im-doing-good.html Mon, 17 Nov 2008 07:38:41 GMT DH and I know a husband and wife that are pregnant right now. We don't hang out with them regularly but we both happened to be pregnant at the same time. I was a week ahead of her in our pregnancies. Well, when I had my MC I couldn't even talk to them anymore. I know that is heartless of me but I couldn't even think of her without thinking that our babies would be almost the exact same age. Well, I get on myspace every once in a while to see how she is doing. Tonight I got on, only to find out that they already know they are having a boy..:cry: I don't know why but this REALLY hurts me to think about. It should've been me knowing what I'm having too. I would be over halfway through my pregnancy by now and I'm not! Now I'm just a bitter woman who can't stand the thought of everyone else having babies but me. I wanted a boy and she gets hers while I am stuck crying over my lost baby. I just hate feeling so bitter. I want to be happy for them but it's so hard. Not to mention, I have another friend that likes to rub it in my face that she has a baby. :hissy:UGH! I know I'm just having a bad night. I feel like such a bitch for having these thoughts sometimes. I just needed to rant a little. ]]> cleckner04 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73207-just-think-im-doing-good.html Being single and miscarrying http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73099-being-single-miscarrying.html Sun, 16 Nov 2008 19:50:10 GMT I recently miscarried, without knowing I was pregnant and despite using birth control, two weeks after my long term boyfriend broke up with me. It... I recently miscarried, without knowing I was pregnant and despite using birth control, two weeks after my long term boyfriend broke up with me. It turned out to be an incomplete miscarriage and I had a small operation to remove the remaining 'tissue' (as it is so coldly called) ten days following the initial bleeding.

Having lost another baby several years ago with a different partner (again, despite using birth control) I'm too ashamed to speak to friends and family about this most recent experience as I'm worried of what they will think of me.

I've read some good leaflets and websites about miscarriage, but have been surprised to find most of them assume:

a) You want(ed) a child
b) Have a partner who ulitimately loves and supports you

While this may be the case for most would-be-mums, I didn't plan to have a child (though would liked to have kept it) and am now faced with the double challenge of grieiving for my baby alone and adjusting to single life.

I've lost more than I ever knew I had and have never felt so lonely in my whole life.

Any words of support welcome! ]]> NDaniel http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73099-being-single-miscarrying.html Miscarriage Association http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73086-miscarriage-association.html Sun, 16 Nov 2008 18:59:40 GMT Has anyone joined the Miscarriage Association? Any feedback - is it worth doing? Or any informative books on Miscarriage that are worth... Has anyone joined the Miscarriage Association? Any feedback - is it worth doing?

Or any informative books on Miscarriage that are worth buying?

Thanks Rumps xxx ]]> Rumpskin http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/73086-miscarriage-association.html still spotting ?? http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72990-still-spotting.html Sun, 16 Nov 2008 11:26:30 GMT hi all i could do with some advice please, my natural m/c started 18 days ago , i passed the sac on the 3 rd day , and then about 2 days later the... hi all i could do with some advice please, my natural m/c started 18 days ago , i passed the sac on the 3 rd day , and then about 2 days later the blood went brown ,but still thick and clotty , well it still has not stopped and although its light ,this does seem to be going on for a long while now and i am starting to wonder if maybe there is tissue that has not come away and is causing the bleeding to carry on, i was gonmna ring the dr on monday ,but dont want to look like i am just milking the situation or overreacting.

any advice welcome
:hug::hug: ]]> becky77 http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72990-still-spotting.html OH Finally spoke about my m/c http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72835-oh-finally-spoke-my-m-c.html Sat, 15 Nov 2008 14:54:48 GMT Hello ladies for those who have follwed my posts. I had said that since my m/c in october my partner had been ever so cruel about it all to me. And... Hello ladies for those who have follwed my posts. I had said that since my m/c in october my partner had been ever so cruel about it all to me. And how we where no longer together.

Well last night i had popped round to see his mum. I had totally thought i was getting better at dealing with it. But when she started to ask me how i felt id relised id been keeping it locked up deep inside an not really allowed myself to grieve as i was also coping with the breakup. It all came spilling out and she had also been telling me that my ex had been acting more human an not so nasty an cruel to everyone aswel. She said he spoke to her for the first time. He is a typical man very little words with his own strong oppinions.
She said she had asked him how he was feeling an he told her in as few words as possible. That he had been blaming him self.
Cause when i first found out i was pregnant he wasnt happy at all. But then after 3 weeks he had finally started to come round. I lost the baby 3 days after he finally spoke to me that he was happy about our special little gift.
I got the chance to speak to him last night first time since 25th Oct my m/c was 23rd Oct. He looked so sad in his eyes when i seen him. Couldnt even look at me. After sitting with his mum and dad having dinner an a general laugh. I told him how bad he'd made me feel about it all. Told him that he had made the whole thing a nightmare for me. But i also listend to him saying that he feels terrible about how he acted an that he wasnt there for me. I told him how ill iv been about everything. He has been ill about it too. Looks thinner an quite depressed. He has been scared to contact me. I told him i wasnt scared of a fone call. I was scared he blamed me for what happend. I also made it clear to him that if he still wasnt prepared to allow me to cry an be angrey and down at times that i was still prepard to walk away an start to grieve properly on my own. But i also told him that i know he was grieving in a different way. The proccess in his mind started with anger where mine started with the feeling of loss. But through all this he just held me close tightly an that ment more than any words he could ever write or say to me.

We sat for hours having a long talk about all the things that could of been. And cried alot aswel. I was over come with so many emotions that i have been keeping locked up pretending i was getting by ok. When all i really needed was to be held an just be allowed to cry. It may have been 3 weeks late. And i will never forget how he treated me but i have allowed my self to forgive him.An now i feel i can finally start to grieve properly with him.

Thank you ladies so so much you have all helped me get by when im not sure with out this site what i would have been like. You were there in my time of need when i truly felt alone.

Its still a journey we must all go on though it is a journey much much unwanted. But its nice to at least know there are ladies on here who truly know how each other are feeling in these difficult times.

May all our little angels be happy. But missed a great deal. But also never forgotten.
:hug::hug::hug:
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx ]]> Wishfull http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72835-oh-finally-spoke-my-m-c.html A Special Angel Poem http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72713-special-angel-poem.html Fri, 14 Nov 2008 23:32:24 GMT
A Special Angel

There's a special Angel in Heaven
thats is a part of me
It is not where I wanted him
but where God wanted him to be.
He was here for just a moment
like a night time shooting star.
And though he is in Heaven
he isn't very far.
He touched the heart of many
like only an Angel can do.
We held him every minute
for the end we all knew.
So I send this special message
to the Heaven up above.
Please take care of my Angel
and send him all my love.

Another 2 poems I find comfort from are,

I'll Carry You In My Heart
Why God takes the little ones
I swear I'll never know
You had so much life to live
It just wasn't time to go.

For comfort, now, I think of you
With tiny little wings
Up above, in a beautiful place,
Listening to angels sing.
You'll never know the pain I feel
The hurt you left behind
Oh, what I wouldn't give to hold you one more time...

I carried you in my womb,
Then I carried you in my arms
And now, until it no longer beats
I'll carry you in my heart...

And


In a baby castle, way beyond the sky
My baby plays with angel toys that money cannot buy,
Who am I to wish him back into this world of strife,
No, play on my little man, you have eternal life.

And as the day draws to an end and I climb into bed,
His little arms embrace me and I gently kiss his head,
For I now have a treasure that I hold above all other,
I have had a baby son and he a loving Mother
]]> Bunnipowder http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72713-special-angel-poem.html My story about my beautiful Callum x http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72706-my-story-my-beautiful-callum-x.html Fri, 14 Nov 2008 22:51:01 GMT Thought Id post my story, tell you all about my gorgeous Callum, mind you thought id be posting it in the birth announcements not this part, anyway... Thought Id post my story, tell you all about my gorgeous Callum, mind you thought id be posting it in the birth announcements not this part, anyway here goes..
I had a very straight forward pregnancy no problems what so ever well so I think... only had 1 tiny blip when we got told at our 20 wk scan we was having a girl only to find out 12 weeks later at 3d scan he was very much a little boy!! anyway my due date 19th sep came and went a wk later i had a sweep still nothing so i was booked in for a induction on 2nd october so off we went me and my OH my mom was my birthing partner too but i was only going to call her when things got started, at 7.30AM i had a pessary midwife checked me 6 hours later and said i didnt need another lot and she would get me a bed on the labour ward soon as but they was busy. well got to 9pm and my mom had arrived and we was told no chance would i get a bed until the morning so i had to spend the night in the delivery room with moms who'd had their babies, so was getting woken up a bit in the night, i woke up around 6am when i started gettin pretty strong contractions so i text my OH and my mom to come back down while i waited i got in the bath i felt so alone and started crying the contractions were that painful, when they arrived found out id got a bed on the labour ward so off we went me in a wheelchair contractions were 2 strong for me to have walked there. on the labour ward i had a internal and a midwife said I was 2cm dilated bit disapointed because i was 2cm dilated when my community midwife gave me a sweep and she said she had broke my waters but i felt nothing coming out i always imagined a big gush. Few hours after i was put on a drip to make contractions stronger i asked for some pain relief i had gas and air and then pethidine i wasnt impressed with either and begged for a epidural. Had the epidural bit of a drama there because the midwife split on some water and fell so i had another midwife then who gave me another internal and found i was 8cm dilated and said we would start pushing at 7pm and i should have the baby by 9pm she left me another hour for the epidural to wear off so i could feel when to push. and then it was time to push, which wasnt how i imagined time went on and id been pushing for 2 hours when another midwife came in and started messing with the drip in my hand and then i had to be cut which i felt but id had a anasthetic to numb it so wasnt to bad nxt thing i kno its all a bit of a blur my mom has turned her back and walked away and some one is saying dont worry and then the hospital bed throws back and a midwife is shoving my leg literally up to my head. my mom later told me the midwife delivering callum tells the other one "i cant get him out" so she hit the emergency button and 5 other midwifes come running in but then he was soon out at 20:53 and they placed him on me i was thinkin where have all these women come from?? Callum's shoulders had got stuck, the cord was around his neck and he passed meconium (sp?) and he was very blue but he was crying they did the checks and everything seemed fine he weighed a mighty 9lb14 oz (my midwife had estimated 7lb14oz - 8lb9oz so she was bit off), after being stitched up etc we was wheeled back to neonatal ward around midnight i was back on a drip and my mom and OH had been sent home, callum was asleep but kept crying and whinging (which we later believe to have been fits) and i was stoking his hand soothing him back but i was panicking what if he started really crying because of the drip in my hand and feeling very sore down below i was worried i wouldn't be able to get him out of the cot so i kept calling the midwife because he'd only managed 1 oz since id had him so i was worried he was hungry, the midwife offered to take him let me get some sleep, a hour or two later she came back and said that they was taking callum down to the neonatal unit because he had a low temp and wasnt feeding, they said he would be fine they just wanted to do a few tests and he'd soon be back with me, i went to see him before they took him and he looked so peaceful sleeping! In the morning a doctor came and told me callum had been having fits and they didnt know why, i went down to see him and he'd been put on a ventilator to help him breath, as the days went on he'd stopped having fits but then completely stopped breathing for himself, a MRI scan was done and they said part of his brain hadn't developed and parts showed signs were oxygen hadn't got to it and that led to brain damage. they said this could of happend when he was inside me,the doctor said i could of had a infection that i didnt know about, there was no movement in callums eyes when a light was shone in them and he didnt respond to being touched, he was completely brain damaged. it was all so hard to believe because he was fine when i first had him,but the doctors said it could take upto 48 hours for the swelling on his brain to have a impact, there was nothing they could do and me and my OH had to decide when to turn off callums machines. we gave him a wash with cotton wool and water and then changed his nappy and put him in a sleepsuit as they took off his wires and tubes i was able to hold him which is all i wanted to do then because i hardly got chance to after i had him with our parents coming in and then being stitched up, but he was losing his color very fast and i just couldn't watch so OH held him and i left the room I went back down when he'd gone only 5 days old not even a week old and i just sat and cuddled him, kissing him he was so chubby and beautiful he looked perfect it was so hard to believe that there was something wrong with him because i never had any problems i went to all my checkups i didnt drink or smoke! We had a post mortem done to get more answers which were still waiting for results for, iv done my own research and it sounds to me like its cerebral palsy but i am no medical expert i just hope they can tell me why it happend and whether its genetic and likely to happen again or my worst fear whether his brain got damaged through the labour because he got stuck, it would be hard to deal with that if things where done differntly id still have my baby here now. The funeral went okay i even managed to stand up and read a poem i found on the internet, its lovely and i think many of you will find it comforting I will post it if anyone wants me to. Its been 6 weeks now since Callum died and the last 2 weeks iv been finding it harder to cope i just want my answers and now we'v been told to get the headstone we want we have to apply to some one above the vicar and that isnt even a definate we will be able to have it then, its just not fair iv lost my baby and now im being told i cant even have the headstone i want for him and im still in the dark as to why he was so poorly:cry: ]]> Bunnipowder http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72706-my-story-my-beautiful-callum-x.html an update and question http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72701-update-question.html Fri, 14 Nov 2008 22:33:09 GMT hi all just an update i have the hospital for a checkup 3 weeks after my m/c and life is getting easier, but i have a quiry i dont mean to be crude... hi all just an update i have the hospital for a checkup 3 weeks after my m/c and life is getting easier, but i have a quiry

i dont mean to be crude but i can only explain it as this,
me and my boyfreind have started intercourse again and ive heard your more fertile after a m/c so my boyfriend pulls out when he comes but bcoz im more fertile and if a bit goes in will the chance i will become pregnant be more than before the m/c???

also how long after a m/c do i expect my first period? the hospital hasnt made anything clear and its frustrating

thanks and i hope everyone is ok
:hug: x x x ]]> mjbazz http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72701-update-question.html Spirit Baby http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72442-spirit-baby.html Fri, 14 Nov 2008 03:52:39 GMT for all of you who may have lost a baby i just wanted to share this with you!! May god bless all of you with your spirit baby!! For all of you who... for all of you who may have lost a baby i just wanted to share this with you!! May god bless all of you with your spirit baby!!

For all of you who don't know Shanon's story http://tribute.perfectmemorials.com/...-ellen-oleyar/ I read this last night and couldn't stop myself from crying myself to sleep God Bless You Shannon And Just know that Parker is still here maybe not in body but in mind a spirit!!!!! This is something special I wanted to Share with you ladies this is on the tribute page to Parker I want you all to remember it !!!!!!!! And Shannon You Are The Single Strongest Person I Have Ever Had The Pleasure Of Speaking To!! May God Bless You With Your Spirit Baby!!!


~Chapter Excerpt from Part IV of Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife
~Spirit Baby

"Colin, my twelve-year-old son, discovered me late one rainy afternoon sitting at the kitchen table, a damp Kleenex crumpled in my left hand, wiping my eyes as I tried to compose myself for his sake. It was the third week of January, two months after I'd miscarried a pregnancy, but I still found it impossible to get through a day without at least one meltdown into misery.

Stunned w hen the test came back positive, Rog and I had stared at each other with doubt and ambivalence. At forty-one, my professional life consumed me. I'd just achieved what some had predicted was an impossibility: I'd been granted delivery privileges at Alta Bates, and as a consequence, my midwifery practice burgeoned. Some months I delivered twelve babies, and no one ever knew if or when I'd be home. Rog, too, felt stretched to his limits, keeping his business afloat while picking up the slack for my frequent unscheduled absences. Colin and Jill approached their challenging adolescent years. How could we fit an infant into our lives? But when I lost the pregnancy and all hope for resolution dissolved with my tears, I fell in love with the baby that was not to be.

Colin asked, "Are you crying about the baby?" and when I nodded tearfully, he said, "Well, you just have to have another one, Mom, because it's a Spirit Baby, and you should be its mother."

I must have looked puzzled because he said, "Don't you know about Spirit Babies? How could I know about them if you don't? I mean, you're my mom!" But he could see my perplexity.

So my first child, this not-yet-teen-aged boy, pulled a wooden chair to my side and draped his thin arm across my shoulders, saying, "Well, Mom, here's how it is. See, I was one myself, so that must be how I know. Anyway, every woman has a circle of babies that goes around and around above her head, and those are all the possible babies she could have in her whole life. Every month, one of those babies is first in line. If she gets pregnant, then that's the baby that's born. If she doesn't get pregnant, the baby goes back into the circle and keeps going around with all the others. If she gets pregnant but something bad happens before the baby's born…now listen, Mom, because here's the really cool part. It goes back into the circle, but it becomes a Spirit Baby, and all the other babies give it cuts. Each month, it's always first in line. Isn't that great?

"So you just have to get pregnant again, and you'll have the same Spirit Baby. If you don't, though, then the baby circle will just beam that little Spirit Baby over to some other woman's circle, and it'll be first in line for her. It keeps being first in line somewhere until it finally gets born.

"But it'd be a shame for you not to have it yourself, because I know how much you want it. So you just have to try again. Mom, remember that baby you lost before I was born?" I nodded wordlessly. "Well, that was me. Really. I've always known I was a Spirit Baby. I mean, I know what I'm talking about here, Mom."

In spite of Colin's certainty that our household, so often bordering on chaos, lacked only an infant to make things perfect, Rog and I demurred. But Colin didn't give up and even enlisted his sister's support. Driving with them in the car one evening, I looked at my son in the passenger seat beside me. He stared out the side window and tried to hide his tears, but I saw the flush on his face, the shaking of his shoulders, and the surreptitious swipe of hand across cheek.

Six months had passed since my miscarriage, and I had just finished yet another discussion in which I'd told my pleading son that having a third baby at my age was out of the question. I reached over the space between us and squeezed his fingers. "Colin, I don't understand this passion you have for a baby. Why do you want one so much?"

He tore his gaze from the distant hills and looked at me with swimming eyes and trembling lips. In a choking voice, he put all of his twelve-year-old passion into his reply.

"Oh, Mom! Oh. Just for the joy of it!"

Jill stretched forward from the back seat and placed a hand on each of our shoulders. "Yeah, Mom, just for the joy of it."

It was my turn to look out the side window and struggle with misty vision.
So, at a time when most women eye the empty nest at the end of their branch on the family tree with something approaching relief, I gave consideration to laying just one more egg. Several months of discussions peppered with doubt and disbelief followed. Although Rog and I made the final decision, there's no denying that a big part of our decision to have a third child began with the insistence of our adolescent children that we "needed a baby in the house." Rog and I took a deep breath, looked at each other across the blond heads of those two wishful children, swallowed – and made a giant leap of faith.
I conceived my Spirit Baby a week later. Just for the joy of it."
~End of Story~ ]]> TTCSECONDJOY http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72442-spirit-baby.html How do I help him http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72359-do-help-him.html Thu, 13 Nov 2008 19:59:15 GMT My DH is so sensitive and I know that the m/c is hurting him so badly, but he just won't talk about it. I say things like 'I miss my baby' and all he can say is I know. It is eating him up but he just will not talk about it. Any ideas on how I can help him come to terms with it ? ]]> misstrouble http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72359-do-help-him.html Hi ladies http://www.babyandbump.com/miscarriage-support/72326-hi-ladies.html Thu, 13 Nov 2008 18:20:18 GMT <