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http://www.babyandbump.com en Tue, 02 Dec 2008 16:40:03 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.babyandbump.com/images/bnb-v370/misc/rss.jpg http://www.babyandbump.com http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/77206-lol-hes-so-stupid.html Mon, 01 Dec 2008 08:36:07 GMT I asked babies dad for some money for some sleepsuits and vests for Tye as hes grown out the newborn size now and he said no he wont give me money... I asked babies dad for some money for some sleepsuits and vests for Tye as hes grown out the newborn size now and he said no he wont give me money because he hasnt got much but he will send me what i need in the post..

Well i just got a package in the post with the cheapest plain white pack of 3vests and 3sleepsuits.. 3?! thats hardly enough... but also there were two bibs and 3pairs of socks saying 'i love daddy' :rofl: why on earth am i going to put them on my son when his 'daddy' doesnt even want to see him!!!!!

Im sure hes trying to play mind games with me.. What a twat! ]]> Single Parents missjacey44 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/77206-lol-hes-so-stupid.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/77093-single-has-its-highs-lows.html Sun, 30 Nov 2008 19:16:16 GMT I split up with my daughters dad in april this year (My lil girl was 2 at the time). we have not been getting on for years.. not since I found out he... I split up with my daughters dad in april this year (My lil girl was 2 at the time). we have not been getting on for years.. not since I found out he was cheating on me when I was pregnant (and had been for 6 months). I am sooo much happier without 'him' but I am so so lonely without 'someone'. He has moved on and is now living with his new girlfriend and although I am not jealous of 'her', I am sorta jealous that he has moved on and I am still single. I mean.. after all, I ended it. He begged me to try but in the end I slept with someone else and told him.. sorta just so there was no way back. I do love being single in the sense that I am now free to do as I please without having to answer to him etc.. but I dunno. Guess I just feel like I have drawn the short straw cuz I am either working, or stuck at home with amelia. He is always out going for meals, concerts and shoppin trips with his new girlfriend. He sees amelia twice a week for 3 hours a day (his choice). I have asked on several occasions if he can take her for the night so I can maybe go out or even to give my parents a break from babysitting duties once in a while whilst I am at work but no. He says he wont or cant cuz he is working (when I know very well he isnt). I know its his loss at the end of the day cuz he is missing out on time with amelia but thats not the point. He used to pay all the bills and my mortgage and I ended it knowing full well that I would have to pay it all myself. Everyone I ever like doesnt wanna know. Thats how it seems anyway. I just want a hug... somene to love me! Cuz amelia's dad clearly never did or he wouldnt have cheated. Thats partly why I ended it with him. I aint getting any younger and I want to be with someone that does love me for me. No point plodding on with no love in the relationship. I see on the tv the love in peoples eyes (sad comment I know), like hollyoaks with mercedes and mal and I think 'have I ever actually had that... hmmmm nope I dont think I have'. Its been either them liking me more or me liking them more, never us both being proper in love. Im jus havin a shite day I suppose. Lonely. :cry: ]]> Single Parents pinkish_angel http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/77093-single-has-its-highs-lows.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/77061-almost-past-all-firsts.html Sun, 30 Nov 2008 16:43:00 GMT I'm putting it in here instead of in the relationships section because its more about the lack-of-relationship-ness hah.

I'm almost past all the firsts without Adam!! I mean all the good moments we had, its almost over. I just have to get through Christmas without him and that'll be our last good time that I could have difficulty with. After Xmas last year was pure hell so I don't want to remember any of that! I can't believe its been almost a year since everything hit the fan with us :shock: So just about a year since our relationship was emotionally over. I think it pretty much ended on Boxing day last year. I must say I'm happy to be entering a new year with a fresh start without him :happydance:

Anyway I'm celebrating my lack of Adam-ness today :rofl: ]]> Single Parents rae05 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/77061-almost-past-all-firsts.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76476-dont-want-father-babys-life.html Fri, 28 Nov 2008 04:28:54 GMT i really need sum advice on what 2 do...im 14weeks pregnant and broke up with my ex wen i was about 10weeks..cut a long story short i left becuz he... i really need sum advice on what 2 do...im 14weeks pregnant and broke up with my ex wen i was about 10weeks..cut a long story short i left becuz he has mental isues which i think r caused from smoking marijuana (dont kno how 2 spell it sorry)..he smokes constantly everyday and is drunk everyday u dont c him without a drink in hes hand..the reason i think he has sumthing wrong with hes head is becuz if he doesnt get hes own way he wil literaly pull hes own hair out or cry in front of a crowd of people example my family at my uncles wedding becuz he wasnt getting attention so he told me hes dog died..on a separate ocasion he told me hes uncle died becuz i was going out with my mum..none of this was tru..i really dont want my baby knowing him and i dont know if that is the wrong thing or not but i grew up with my father who is an addict and i have seen alot in my life and had 2 b the adult for my father i dont want drugs or an alcoholic around my baby...am i being cruel by not wanting my baby 2 have its father?..i also dont want him ther wen the baby is born becuz he wil pik on me n fyt with me..i dont want him on the birth certificate and i want the baby 2 have my last name...has any1 else gone thru a similar situation? ]]> Single Parents leash http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76476-dont-want-father-babys-life.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76161-survive-single-parent.html Thu, 27 Nov 2008 01:46:42 GMT I found this article and I thought some of us here could benefit from it. *Surviving As A Single Parent: Seven Simple Suggestions To Make Your Life... I found this article and I thought some of us here could benefit from it.

Surviving As A Single Parent: Seven Simple Suggestions To Make Your Life Easier
Danielle Hollister


1 - Forgive even if you will never be able to Forget -

Let go of grudges you may hold against your child’s other parent, who is absent from BOTH of your lives. Holding onto feelings of anger will not change your situation and will probably consume a great deal of your energy - energy you need to devote to creating a positive environment for your child. If you dwell on your disappointment with and/or dislike of the father or mother of your child - chances are your child will sense your feelings and suffer in some way from your negative attitude.

2 - Make the most of everything you have -

Even if you do not have a lot of money, you do have your child and your love and your time to give to him or her. Try to remember that monetary wealth and material possessions are not the most important items in your child’s life. Your love, support and time together mean much more to them. You can have fun for free. Activities like - going for a walk or a bike ride, playing at the park, coloring, painting, singing, or dancing - will thrill your child just as much as spending money to go to an amusement park, an arcade or a toy store.

3 - Be the best parent you can possibly be -

Give as much as you can without setting goals that are unrealistic for one parent to achieve. Don’t beat yourself up for what cannot be. Do recognize what you can do to create a good life for your child to the best of your abilities.

4 - Develop a network of reliable resources - Families are not biological.

Surround yourself and your child with friends you know and trust - people who care about both of you. “Aunts” and “Uncles” and even “Grandparents,” who are not blood-related can be just as beneficial to your child as actual biological family members. The “family” you create for your child can provide him or her with the same kind of love and support as a traditional family. They can also help you with your responsibilities as a single parent. Let them play an active role in your child’s life. Learn to turn to your “family” when you need a break. Nobody should have to go it alone and you will probably be able to be a better parent by relying on your “family” of close friends to support you and your child.

5 - Take responsibility for your life today -

Remember whatever led you to where you are today, you are responsible for another life - the innocent life of a child, who didn’t ask to be born. Your child is not responsible for the experiences or events that made you become a single parent. Your child is completely dependent upon you through no choice of their own. Don’t let them down or hold them accountable for your actions (or the actions of their absent parent). They are powerless and vulnerable to the possibly less-than-ideal consequences they face as the child of a single parent. Your role and influence in their life is paramount to their chances of becoming a happy, productive, successful adult. They need you more than their words will ever tell.

6 - Set up daily rituals and regular routines -

Your child needs stability and security. One way to provide this is by developing a daily routine. Simple things like - going to the park every Sunday afternoon, eating dinner together each night, sharing a treat before nap time or reading a book together before bed every night, will become activities that your child looks forward to and can count on to occur with regularity.

7 - Be consistent and dependable -

Create realistic rules and a standard of discipline that you stick to all the time. If you’re consistent with your child, he or she will learn what is acceptable behavior and what is not. They will also learn what you expect from them and what they can expect from you. If you’re dependable, they will know that they can always count on you to help them with their homework, be there for dinner or tuck them in bed at night. They have to be able to depend on you. You’re the most important person in their life. Try to remember that no matter how tired you are at the end of the day or how frustrated you may become when they’re fussy - They need you to be there for them. You should cherish every moment with your child - they are the best blessings on earth. ]]> Single Parents rae05 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76161-survive-single-parent.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76138-going-alone.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 23:35:25 GMT I am thinking of going it alone... I know i need to but I don't want to. I am balancing on the edge of a cliff and i need a good shove.

How do you do it?? I am on my own 24/7 for three months at a time and I cant cope....I dont think i can do it long term. With tom's extra needs ......meh..HElp! ]]> Single Parents Emmea12uk http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76138-going-alone.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76125-omfg.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 22:52:12 GMT GRRRRRRRRRRRRR..... Im sorry but if i dont explode somewhere i think i might kill!! MY %^*$%^*£$ @@@ excuse of an ex fiancee decided to try and... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR.....

Im sorry but if i dont explode somewhere i think i might kill!!


MY %^*$%^*£$ @@@ excuse of an ex fiancee decided to try and get me to talk to him on MSN earlier by as usual continuenly harrassing my male friend. So out of frustration i agree to talk to him and when i do after a while of pussy footing around and not actually telling me what up, he tells me he's got a STI!!
I go into panic mode.. Suposedly he's got it from me (yer right player that he was) we argue about it for a while and then i think "why am i argueing sh*t i could be really ill!!" my friend is a type 1 diabetic so i tell him straight away he'll need to get himself checked as well but ill go to docs 1st tomorrow morning.

Ex is nattering away about it to both of us. My friend and i fall out over the fact that i've potentially given him something that with his condition can kill him and leave his boys without the only parent they have!!


All to find out that my %&%^$%)^) of an Ex was having a laugh, just messing with me to get revenge....

What a F*king W*nkstain!!! :hissy:

He then told my friend he was just having a laugh & hoped my friend could see the funny side of it..

I am so so so so bloody angry.... I was absolutly petrified that id given something to my mate and that christ what if i could of given something to Emily... And he's getting his Jollies over it... God he makes me so sick!!

Phew had to let that out somewhere before i was arrested for murder in the middle of the night...

B*llocks in a blender seems a pretty fitting way to go i think... ]]> Single Parents starbucks101 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/76125-omfg.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/75926-fathers-having-nothing-do-there-childern.html Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:24:28 GMT Just a quick question really

Has the father of your child decided he wants nothing to do with his baby before it was born? And when you've had it has he changed his mind or have you decided to move away from him so he can't get intouch with you so you can start you life fresh? ]]> Single Parents MishC http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/75926-fathers-having-nothing-do-there-childern.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/75563-csa.html Tue, 25 Nov 2008 08:11:46 GMT Good morning girls. I wonder if u could help me. I am due to have my baby next month. I am no longer with my ex as he started to get violent. I... Good morning girls. I
wonder if u could help
me. I am due to have my
baby next month. I am no
longer with my ex as he
started to get violent. I
am going to contact the
csa as soon as my son is
born what happens do
they send u out forms to
fill in? Then what
happens? He is a waste
of space and don't work
so does he still have to
pay any money? I'm still
unsure of the whole thing
can anyone help? Love
to hear from you. Thanks
kasey x ]]> Single Parents khartnett http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/75563-csa.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/74477-hes-trying-take-away-my-baby-advice-needed.html Fri, 21 Nov 2008 09:20:04 GMT I need help. Im 20 yrs old the father of my unborn baby is going to take me to court to try to get custody of my baby. He is unfit he didnt even know... I need help. Im 20 yrs old the father of my unborn baby is going to take me to court to try to get custody of my baby. He is unfit he didnt even know a baby uses more then 2 diapers a day and he works 40 hours a week and he has no health insurance or anythign and just wants the baby cause he says i always blame him for everything and i dont want to be with him. he lives with his dad and his dad works all day and he thinks he can just have ppl watch the baby every day. meanwhile i am staying home for the baby. Have support of my family have insurance for me and the baby . im not denying him rights to see the baby i jus dont want him to be alone. he will drink and drive. he has done it on so many occasions and he continues to harass his ex gf who he stalks her all the time in which the cops were informed. i know he wouldnt get sole custody even tho he thinks he will but i cant let him get unsupervised visits. i dont know what to do or what are my chances on getting full custody
please help ]]> Single Parents Kris0309 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/74477-hes-trying-take-away-my-baby-advice-needed.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73858-anyone-dating.html Wed, 19 Nov 2008 08:16:21 GMT Was just wondering if anyone is geting back into the dating thing?
I've been on a coupple dates with the same guy since me and John split and it feels great. I was so scared of never meeting anyone cause no one my age (19) would want to go near someone with a child, but I must say this guy seems keen! :lol: I've not introduced him to Kyle though, and dont plan to unless I know things are going to work out, but I guess im kinda worried that when I do he might get scared and run! :dohh: ]]> Single Parents xarlenex http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73858-anyone-dating.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73805-single-mum-awful-ex.html Tue, 18 Nov 2008 22:34:53 GMT First of all I'd like to say hi to you all in advance and congratulations on your pregnancy/babies!!
To introduce myself. I was with my ex for 2 years. It was never an easy relationship with many highs and lows. It took me quite a whil to realise his behaviour was really wrong towards me and was mentally abusive and controlling. Very jealous and possessive. We split up which resulted in me moving back to live with my mum. Then BANG I find out I'm pregnant. I decided that I would give my ex another chance to prove he was changing, but still live at home. He was not willing to accept this and told me if I did not move back with him within a week he would disown me and the baby. Obviously I didn't go back but what followed was a barrage of abusive texts, and I mean they were coming through at a rate of on average 20 a day. In the end I had to phone the police get them to tell him to leave me alone.

Now I know that I have defo not heard the last of him and he will not leave me alone. Although my family are very supportive it does feel hard to know that ultimately I will be doing this on my own. Most days I feel strong and am ready to cope with this.

But I still get fears about what my ex will do in the future. I'm also scared about money and being alone for the rest of my life (which I know I won't be deep down).

Anyone who wants a chat, share experiences or offer some much needed advice will be very much welcome!!

Thanks guys xx ]]> Single Parents http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73805-single-mum-awful-ex.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73583-jelous-exs-new-gf-playing-mummy.html Tue, 18 Nov 2008 10:50:49 GMT Oliver's dad has a new girlfriend and i hate the thought of her being around my son! Anyone else feel like this?? x ]]> Single Parents sweetsammi http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73583-jelous-exs-new-gf-playing-mummy.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73489-preparing-life-single-mum.html Mon, 17 Nov 2008 23:17:41 GMT Hi guys, i've taken a few pregnancy tests-- all positive, with one thats questionable!

Problem is..it'll be my ex's who..is a complete JERK! He knows i have some pregnancy worries..but instead of texting me, asking how I am..he's out with some girl he's met. On top of it, when i told him he just went 'just go the doctors and whatever'...

I know Im going to end up doing this alone, im 19...wanting to go university but naturally this will have to go on hold. Just how do you do it? Im worried..as this is a part of him, and im scared im going to bring the child up and see him everytime i see that child. He's hurt me so so much, apologises...then goes back to what he does. It's just an awful emotional cycle that i can't handle...

I've had a miscarriage/ectopic pregnancy before, and the ex even considered suicide as he said he couldn't handle bringing up a child as it was 'the wrong time for him'. I felt like i was being guilt tripped into an abortion...

Just a rant..how do you women do it?! ]]> Single Parents spanner89 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73489-preparing-life-single-mum.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73416-thought-going-ok.html Mon, 17 Nov 2008 20:15:38 GMT Untill today :cry: Iv been on my own with baby for over a week now and i thought i was doing good untill today. I dont know whether im just having a... Untill today :cry: Iv been on my own with baby for over a week now and i thought i was doing good untill today. I dont know whether im just having a bad day or this is how its going to be.. :cry: ]]> Single Parents missjacey44 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73416-thought-going-ok.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73359-bit-upset-him.html Mon, 17 Nov 2008 17:42:41 GMT So...baby's vatti and I (baby's dad) originally were going to make it work out..move in together, raise baby....and then he chickened out and couldn't do it. He wanted to go explore the world! How could he be held back by his own flesh and blood?! :dohh: Well...we were both in germany and I moved back to America. He agreed to make child support payments and come visit once a year, maybe more. I was kind of looking forward to him coming in December to see our little baby after she (or he!) was born.... About a month ago he got a job in Ireland....and at this point it looks like he won't be coming here after all. Says perhaps in July. Why doesn't he want to see his little pumpkin when he or she arrives? Wait 7 months instead?! I just don't understand...How can someone help create a life and then not want to be a part of raising LO? The worst part is I keep saying I'm okay to raise him/her on my own but in the back of my mind I'm a bit afraid. For some stupid reason I still have feelings for him. He acts very noble about everything and doesn't come off as being a jerk, even though I think he became one the day he ran from all the responsibility and admitted I would be doing all the work really. I'm just in a bad mood and I feel like that's wrong. I should be excited....baby will be here sometime between now and 27 days from today! I can't wait to meet LO, but at the same time wish HE were here. Sorry about the little rant there. Thanks for listening all. ]]> Single Parents Landingmach3 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73359-bit-upset-him.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73038-life-goes.html Sun, 16 Nov 2008 14:54:17 GMT My ex split with me in July and it was really very-very hard for me, as i couldn't imagine my life without him at that moment. But ater one month time he deceided to come back - i was more than happy as still loved him. He was caring, supportive and nice even more than before. He was completely different - i felt in love even more. Unfortunately (or may be not) he couldn't be with me during baby's birth as we were in different countries, but was going to come soon. But suddenly (!!!) something changed in his mind and he said that he doesn't love me anymore, doesn't want to be with me and doesn't want to know about my baby (and his as well) anything.
And you know ladies i feel so relaxed now!!! If before baby's birth i could cry for ages cause of his decision, now i really don't care. It's his loss at first place, not mine. As i always will have my baby boy with me, whom i love more than my life and who will have the same feelings towards me. I saw at him now, he's smiling and my heart melts. And all this difficulties which i probably will have worth this smile. And i know that i will cope with everything as i should for the sake of my boy!
Life goes on and it's BEATIFUL!!! :happydance: ]]> Single Parents Foxxy http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/73038-life-goes.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72851-fathers-rights.html Sat, 15 Nov 2008 16:38:14 GMT This is a complicated situation, but I'll try to stick to the facts. I'll start by saying that I am not the mom or dad, but I am a life-long friend of the father-to-be. Also, this may be the wrong forum for advice, so if anyone can direct me to an active forum, that would be great. But, I frequented forums like this when I was TTC, and I no longer am, but I know how wise the women who frequent these forums are.

Dad dated mom for several months, they broke up and tried to get back together. She was going through a divorce, which has been final for awhile now and was finalized during the first relationship. The reconcilation lasted only about six weeks, but resulted in pregnancy. They had already broken up and she got back together with her ex. Mom and he ex-husband have been an ongoing on and off thing.

Dad was dating someone else by the time he learned about her pregnancy. She decided she did not want him to "be the father" and has resisted any communication with him, and now the baby is due in two weeks. She has decided that her ex is going to be the baby's "dad" and that she is putting his name on the birth certificate.

The child was conceived while both mom and dad were very intoxicated. Because of this, she is telling everyone that she was date-raped by him. I've known the man my whole life and I know he isn't capable of rape, date-rape or anything like it. Yes, she was drunk, but so was he.

Dad was agreeable to allowing her ex/new b/f to raise the baby, IF they went through proper legal channels-adoption. Now that the baby is almost here he cannot stand the thought of being absent from this baby's life, but is willing to negotiate an open adoption with the guy she plans on naming as the father. But, she won't communicate with him. She can't seem to understand WHY they need to do this the legal way.

Also, he doesn't have a lot of money for expensive lawyers, even though he is in need of one. He is mostly troubled by two things:

Not having his child in his life and her telling the child that he was conceived by a rapist. He has been writing letters to the baby and mailing them to himself so that they are officially dated. This child's parentage will never be a secret, as too many people know already.

Secondly, if he manages to put his personal feelings aside and allows her to continue with her plan to have someone else "be the father," he wants to be sure it is done legally through adoption. Otherwise, he will be absent from his child's life and eventually he is going to be slapped with a huge child support tab and labeled a deadbeat.

Is it legal to intentionally name the wrong father on a birth certificate?
What could he be doing to stop her from naming this other guy on the birth certificate?

As a friend, I just try and support him. I hold him when he cries and comfort him. I've encouraged him to follow his heart and do whatever he feels like he can live with and what he thinks is best for the baby. I've tried researching this, but can't find answers. My friend works non-stop, goes to school full-time and has full custody of a teenager. I've tried to help him decide what to do, be a father or allow an adoption, but I don't want to lead him in any direction.

Does anyone have any advice? What an shame. A blessing from God born into legal battling and fighting. It makes me want to cry. ]]> Single Parents violet http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72851-fathers-rights.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72748-cannot-believe.html Sat, 15 Nov 2008 07:34:21 GMT elouise is sleeping through the night! this has been happening for over a week now , just happened over night! xx elouise is sleeping through the night! this has been happening for over a week now , just happened over night! xx ]]> Single Parents angels330 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72748-cannot-believe.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72645-going-single-mom.html Fri, 14 Nov 2008 18:34:48 GMT Hi all, well it seems I'm going to be a single mom. I left my boyfriend last weekend and have moved back in with my mom. He was emotionally abusive and I had had enough of him making me feel like crap all the time, so I left.

Since moving back home I have actually felt rested when I wake up and the "morning sickness" has magically disappeared. I think it was more of a stress sickness. My situation right now is not ideal, but I have the support of all of my family and friends here and I am treated like I should be.

So now I have to find a part time job for some extra money, but I don't have to pay any rent or bills here. My mom says that once the baby is born I will not be expected to work, just take care of my baby.

I do have a question for anyone who may know. If the baby's father is not around when it is born, and I don't put his name on the birth certificate, can he still claim any rights to see the baby? I do not want him involved at all. Thanks. ]]> Single Parents amelia222 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72645-going-single-mom.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72547-some-days-feel-like-super-mum.html Fri, 14 Nov 2008 14:43:47 GMT Some days I feel like Super Failing Mum! :cry: Some days I feel like Super Failing Mum!

:cry: ]]> Single Parents toriaaaaTRASH http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72547-some-days-feel-like-super-mum.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72186-please-help-advice-needed-very-long.html Thu, 13 Nov 2008 11:36:59 GMT This may all be confusing, im just going to cut a long story short as there is so much detail i couldnt possibly go into it all. March 06 found out... This may all be confusing, im just going to cut a long story short as there is so much detail i couldnt possibly go into it all.

March 06 found out i was pregnant, i was 16 OH was 18. Mum wanted me to get an abortion i didnt want one, so i moved in with OH. He has his own council place. We spent most of the pregnancy argueing and fighting and i moved constantly between his and my mums. We would argue, he would kick me out, or it would get so bad i would want to leave pack up all my stuff and move to mums. Then after a few weeks we would sort it out and id move back. This happened all through my pregnancy and all through the 1st year of my daughters life. Then we finally sorted things and i fell pregnant, sadly miscarried. Then fell pregnant again and for 6months things were really good. We had a big row i ended back up at my mums and he met someone else. I started the process to get my own council place so me and my girls had somewhere secure to live. We 2split up for 2months.
In August after many long talks we decided to give it one final go and grow up and stop all the fighting. The girls adore their dad and my eldest loves spending all her time with him and living together as a family. Things were brilliant, no arguements, both sticking to what we had decided would work. Great no problems. I lost my 2 best and only proper friends as they werent happy with me getting back with my OH and were really nasty to me :cry: I didnt care though as i have my OH, my family and my 2 beautiful girls. I did stop taking Ella to playgroup though as the 2girls go there and they would make me feel very uncomfortable and just bitch about me. Well our 2nd daughter was born and everything was amasing. It all seemed to click into place.
Today after a really stupid arguement he has told me to leave. Now the dilemma i have is first of all i dnt want to leave, but he has made it very clear i have no choice. 2nd because of the past i am still registered at living at my mums at the council are waiting for my daughters birth certificate so they can move me to my own place. I hate myself for dragging ella backwards and forwards for 2years, she must feel so insecure and confused. Once she gets settled at OHs we end up at my mums and then she gets settled there and we end up back at OHs. I have been an awful mum :cry:
I cant ring the council and say he has kicked me out so they can accomodate me as homeless, because im registered as living at my mums. But i dnt want to drag the girls back to my mums and wait for my temporary accomodation, which will take 4 weeks from the date they get my daughters birth certificate. :hissy:
I just dont know what to do anymore. I have no friends to turn to and i dont want to talk to my mum about it because she will say "I told you so".

Ive just started taking Ella to a new playgroup which she absolutely loves, now if i move to mums she wont be able to go as its the other side of town and i dont drive. She cant go to the one by my mums because my 2 ex friends go there so now she is going to miss out :cry::cry::cry:

I just feel like i have failed as a mum and i have let my 2 beautiful girls down. I should protect them, keep them safe, instead i just drag them backwards and forwards, dont give them a security! :cry:

Sorry for this! ]]> Single Parents ellasmummy http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/72186-please-help-advice-needed-very-long.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71927-changed-my-mind.html Wed, 12 Nov 2008 15:24:42 GMT Since sperm donor and I split up I always said i'd be happy to bring our daughter up on my own (which is true) and that I want nothing to do with him in the slightest, so therefore would not be seeking him for matinence money for Ava as I want him to have no hold over either of us. To him this was the perfect solution and we haven't spoken since August.

I also stated that when Ava was born I would come home and email him the news and send one picture, so he would know and I would have proof I sent him the news.

Anyway, after i'd given birth I was sending everyone messages saying my munchkin had arrived and being on cloud 9 and all emotional I thought sod it i'm going to text sperm donor too. So I did.

2 hours later he rocked up at the hospital and I agreed to see him. It was awkward but you know, Ava had arrived and I wanted him to see his beautiful daughter. He basically just sat there, refused to look at her, only held her for a minute and never took a picture. It broke my heart to see him treat his 6hour old daughter that way so I asked him what he wanted. His reply?

"Well I thought I best come down like and see IT now it's here"

Sorry? It? You mean your little girl? Right.

Then proceeded to add "Oh my parents will probs come down on the train tomoz to visit"

Again, sorry? What? I told him to leave and there was no chance his parents were visiting, he was lucky I let him in at all.

His behaviour just proved how much of a wanker he really is and still is to this day so now i've changed my mind. I'm making a claim and i'm damn well getting money out of him for his daughters upbringing. He's in the forces he can't hide.

Tosser. ]]> Single Parents ~ Vicky ~ http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71927-changed-my-mind.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71819-dont-know-do.html Wed, 12 Nov 2008 09:29:15 GMT Ive got a 4 week old baby daughter Lily and me and her dad decided to go our seperate ways (2 b honest we were never really 2gether) when i was about... Ive got a 4 week old baby daughter Lily and me and her dad decided to go our seperate ways (2 b honest we were never really 2gether) when i was about 5 months pregnant and at 1st he was totally fine about seeing Lily and being there for in fact he surprised me of his reaction and I was really proud he was seeming to take such an interest.

However 2 weeks ago he gets back with an x girlfriend (who lost his baby and went mental when she find out he had a new baby) and then suddenly he starts demanding to see our daughter for more than a few hours at the weekend and wants to take her on her own without me or anyone else being there. I tried to explain that I didnt think this was a good idea because hes a stranger to her as hes only ever bothered to see her for about 4 hours in total since she was born and could we not just keep the visits the way they were for a few weeks more till she gets used to him and to prove he will take time to visit her as on previous occasions hes ignored visits to go to the football.

Anyways he turns round and says hes gonna take me to court and get access that way, i told him that was fine by me as I have never said he couldnt have visits as I wanted him to be part of her life. I asked for name and address of his lawyer so mines could get in touch as I wanted all this sorted straight away, after about 10 mins of me textin him for name and address he replies its best for everyone if he just cuts all ties with our daughter :(

So now im totally confused, should i still seek legal advice on the off chance hes just tryin to put me off contacting my lawyer or just face facts he wants nothing to do with our daughter. His name is also on the birth certificate which means he has PR but I dont think this is fair if hes saying he doesnt wanna know her, can I do anything about this?

Thanks for taking the time to read thisv and for any help u can offer.
I apologise for such a long post but i really dont know what to do or who to turn to ]]> Single Parents lilysmum http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71819-dont-know-do.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71568-a.html Tue, 11 Nov 2008 15:19:40 GMT being married for nearly 4 years, baby 6 months old and ive decided i can do it anymore. his parents did it, they finally got rid of me. I'm not able to fight them anymore. Filling for divorce today...:cry: ]]> Single Parents Madu http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71568-a.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71377-would-unfair.html Mon, 10 Nov 2008 22:31:43 GMT I'm 17, will be 18 when my precious miracle is born :]
And Me & his/her father are no longer, Nobody knows where he is.
I am pretty sure he's in jail or rehab.. but i have no proof.

Would it be unfair if i had a boyfriend or was dating someone at the time of the birth so the baby has some what of a father figure?
(I wouldn't be dating the person JUST for that reason though) more like just to have someone there because i know the biological father will not be.
and there's chances of me & my ex of 1 yr getting back together, because we just miss each other.
So its not JUST for the baby. ]]> Single Parents LilMama2be http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71377-would-unfair.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71299-single-mum-2-weeks.html Mon, 10 Nov 2008 18:31:51 GMT I dont know if i should post this here but i will be a single mum for 2 weeks I know i sound like a whiner but im not sure ill make it :cry: My... I dont know if i should post this here but i will be a single mum for 2 weeks I know i sound like a whiner but im not sure ill make it :cry:

My husband will be going to school and working and i will alone for 2 weeks from 5am till 11pm and still doing night feedings ..

I thought id ask you girls since your strong and know how to deal with this I could use some advice ..sorry if this offends any one as its only for 2 weeks but im scared to death :hissy: ]]> Single Parents 1st_baby http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71299-single-mum-2-weeks.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71264-hurt.html Mon, 10 Nov 2008 17:05:03 GMT I split up with my fiance in october, because he wanted time away to think about things. Because i'd been moody everyday & we just constantly argued. He said he didnt want to be with me until he's had a think. He didn't know how long he wanted to hiself. But I said i'm not waiting around. I was fine when we split, abit hurt but suprisingly not alot. Anyway, about four weeks have passed now, and i've been ok. Coped by keeping myself busy, etc. But today I've seen his Bebo profile. His mate says on his comments "Yeah, Emo birds are gorgeous aint they" and "Yeah thats it, keep your options open innit" - and there's loads of girls that he's chatting to. He hasn't mentioned that he's a DAD-TO-BE on his profile. He's not said it to anybody. It's hurt me. & the fact that the other day when I rang him he said "Who says were going to be split up 4eva?" "I still love you" etc. Then say he's into emo birds. Hurts. I can't eat my tea coz of it. Why did I have a child with him seriously. He's scum. I hate him. He's hurt me. & my baby's got a waste of a space dad. Brilliant. ]]> Single Parents xXDonnaXx http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71264-hurt.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71188-a.html Mon, 10 Nov 2008 13:36:25 GMT well, just found out my ex is getting married after just 3 months with his girlfriend, im suprised at how upset i am. he really has got away scott... well, just found out my ex is getting married after just 3 months with his girlfriend, im suprised at how upset i am. he really has got away scott free of any feelings or responsibilities. ]]> Single Parents angels330 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71188-a.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71156-kept-putting-off.html Mon, 10 Nov 2008 11:47:48 GMT but yes it looks like i will be a single mother. I still haven't told my family and friends that i'm pregnant yet, god knows how long i'm going to wait.

I kept putting this off trying to believe he will get it together and be there for me etc but we argued so much and i guess i do know that it wouldn't be a good environment to bring up a child.

I hope that he will still be in baby's life but right now i don't think i see that happening. He said he doesn't want us to speak anymore so i don't know.

I have mixed feeling about doing this on my own. Obviously very scared as i didn't imagine it to be like this, well and i was expecting to be much older aswel lol.

I just wanted to post this for me, i keep trying to believe that when the baby's born i'm going to have the three of us living together etc but i need to come back to the reality this isn't going to happen. I'm sad but i know its for the best the same time. ]]> Single Parents dreams http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71156-kept-putting-off.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71077-if-only.html Mon, 10 Nov 2008 03:35:50 GMT If only I had somebody to share these wonderful times with, to watch baby with me as he grows.To see him smile everyday & do/experience new things along his journey in life.
If only there was somebody who cared like I do, so we could all be a family together.
If only there was that one person who could share these times, & help create more wonderful little babies with me later on in life.

If only..:cry: ]]> Single Parents mBLACK http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/71077-if-only.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70994-looks-like-might-joining-you-here.html Sun, 09 Nov 2008 19:24:53 GMT Well tonight I discussed the possibility that I might be pregnant with my OH (he is away and I didn't want to tell him that I am actually pregnant).

His response was

"We're not ready huni, don't worry we'll sort it. I know i dont understand about abortion, but it will be twice as worse if you dont do it in the situation we are in. I want our child to come into the world into a nice, happy environment"

Well I'm sorry, but I dont want our child to die. I am not killing my baby!

Fucking men :hissy: ]]> Single Parents orange-sox http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70994-looks-like-might-joining-you-here.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70917-newly-pregnant-single-scared-stiff.html Sun, 09 Nov 2008 14:01:18 GMT I just wondered if there is anyone out there that can wave a magic wand and make all fears and tears go away??? Recently found out I was pregnant... I just wondered if there is anyone out there that can wave a magic wand and make all fears and tears go away???

Recently found out I was pregnant and at first I was over the moon, always said I wanted another one, but I would have to be in a relationship that was strong and settled, and boy did I think I was.

Now I'm on my own with my 7 year old daughter and scared that I wont be able to do this.

I moved away from all my friends 6 months ago, and know no one where I live. I think if I cry any more I will flood the front room.

Someone please give me a little inspiration or hope, and Im sorry to moan :cry:

Andrea xxx ]]> Single Parents dolly28 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70917-newly-pregnant-single-scared-stiff.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70352-made-my-claim.html Fri, 07 Nov 2008 09:44:36 GMT Well last night I finally put my child support claim in!!

I gave them his address, 2 phone numbers & work details so i'm hoping it wont be too long. They said they aim to have processed new cases in 12 weeks!

First they are gonna try calling him! They will try each number 3 times & if he don't answer then they'll write to him. He has 7 days to respond to the letter & if he doesn't respond to that then they'll go straight to his work place & do a decuctions from earnings!!

I'd love to see his face when they call :D ]]> Single Parents Younglutonmum http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70352-made-my-claim.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70252-feeling-low-being-my-own.html Thu, 06 Nov 2008 21:10:29 GMT Hi I don't know if this is normal but I am feeling very down, people have told me its hormones but this cloud has been hanging over me for days now. I have periods of feeling ok and periods when I feel so down in the dumps and tearful at the drop of a hat. My partner and I split when I was couple of months gone and now he is refusing to acknowledge that he is even having a child. He doesn't believe that he is the father, as when we were on a break I slept with another man but there is 3 weeks between them and my due date indicates that my ex is the father. This situation is really getting me down, I feel I should be enjoying this time of my life but I just can't. I feel he is using the paternity of the child as a way of getting out of the responsibilities of fatherhood and this is making me so angry. Is there anyway I can reassure him he is the father apart from a DNA test? Please help ]]> Single Parents Katie 22 http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/70252-feeling-low-being-my-own.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/69940-antenatal-classes.html Wed, 05 Nov 2008 21:32:12 GMT ...were horrible!!! They lumped me, a 20 and a half year old single mother to be with her best friend in with a load of smug 30-something happy... ...were horrible!!! They lumped me, a 20 and a half year old single mother to be with her best friend in with a load of smug 30-something happy couples who all stared at me like I was a leper! :hissy: ]]> Single Parents thesockqueen http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/69940-antenatal-classes.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/69836-he-came-around.html Wed, 05 Nov 2008 16:12:13 GMT Ive seen John a few times since we broke up and its been fine, but today was horrible :( He broke down into uncontrollable tears..I feel like im the... Ive seen John a few times since we broke up and its been fine, but today was horrible :( He broke down into uncontrollable tears..I feel like im the devil in disguise. How can I hurt someone so much and really not mean to? :( ]]> Single Parents xarlenex http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/69836-he-came-around.html http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/69607-getting-really-anxious.html Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:26:37 GMT For the most part of my pregnancy i've been positive-ish about bringing up Ava on my own without having her Dad around - it's been my personal feelings about my failed relationship that has been the main problem.

Now though I just can't shake off how scared I feel about being a single Mum, about being solely responsible for this little persons care and upbringing. I really don't want to fail at it and i'm terrified I will and everyone will look down on me.

I have my family around but I don't live with them, and most of my friends disappeared off the scene when they realised baby was my priority and I can't just go flashing the cash at a minutes notice.

My due date is 4 weeks exactly away.. i'm term in one week. It's getting so close and the closer it gets the more panicky and anxious I feel. I already love Ava so much, I don't want to be a disappointment to her. :( ]]> Single Parents ~ Vicky ~ http://www.babyandbump.com/single-parents/69607-getting-really-anxious.html