Where do i belong?!

aflight84 · Mar 9th, 2009, 18:20 PM

Hey Girls,
Not really sure where i belong anymore as most of you know I lost the twins last week one was ectopic the other miscarriage it's a week tomorrow and i'm dreading waking up in the morning. I don't know how i'm going to feel each morning is different.
I wanted a baby so bad and as soon as i got the littlest glimps it was over i don't know how i'm going to try again i was verging on wanting to give up before!
It's 2 years in April and with every month that passes i loose more hope.
What should I do? What will keep me going?

Anna x

claire99991 · Mar 9th, 2009, 18:42 PM

Hey babe im so sorry this has happend to you life is so cruel!!

as time goes on i think you will regain your strength to carry on with your journey, Give yourself time hun i think u will know when the time is right to start again, i know i have only been trying coming up to my 10th cycle now and i feel guilty for whinging as i know lots of people including you have been trying so much longer but i do know how this emotional rollercoaster can get you down its awful, i have no been told by my doc that this journey for me is likely to continue for sumtime its going to be tough to get me a sticky bean and i ask myself if i have the strength to see it thru, the answer is i dont know at the min i will carry on. You have so many ppl on there that care about you they will help you with the strength you need to carry on. XXXXXX

(take time to grieve for your babies, lots of hugs for you xx)

Tory123 · Mar 9th, 2009, 18:47 PM

Hi Hun

I have not got the answers for you as can't imagine what you are going through. All I know from what I have read that in a number of different groups everyone thinks alot of you and you can be where ever feel you can get the most support.

HAYS · Mar 10th, 2009, 04:57 AM

Hey lovely, im so very sorry for what you have been through. Life just isnt fair sometimes hun, but I promise you, you will be blessed with a baby. Hard to see that at the moment, but with the support of everyone around you, you will feel better
xxx

aflight84 · Mar 10th, 2009, 05:44 AM

Hey Girls,
Thanks for your messages.
It is so strange the way i'm feeling right now, when i came out of hospital and saw all the messages on here i'd never felt so lonely yet so loved in all my life.
x x x

maz · Mar 10th, 2009, 06:08 AM

Hi hun

I am soooo sorry for your losses. I too lost a baby very early on, but obviously our circumstances are very different, so on the one hand I know something of how you feel, but on the other, I have no idea of what you're going through, or what the future holds for you.

What I do know, is that it does get easier as the days go by, and you will know when the time is right to start trying again. As for where you belong, you belong with the people that love you - your family, your DH - and your friends on bnb will be here when you need them too.

I hope you start to heal soon - take the time you need, and don't rush it. You will never forget your little babies, but you will start to come to terms with them not being here.

Good luck and

for you and your DH...

Tracie87 · Mar 10th, 2009, 06:36 AM

hunni you belong here with us, youl never be lost with us in here..
At the moment the time will drag and youl feel so bad, but in time it does start to ease. with the love of your hubby and the friendship of great people.
It took me ages 2 get over it but with time and help i got there

we love u anna
xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Bexy · Mar 10th, 2009, 07:17 AM

Hi Anna,

I can only repeat all the lovely messages above and say that you belong wherever you want to be!!!

Life is v.v.cruel and the people that are most deserving get overlooked with the intervention of horrible fate!

Its like others said, you need to take time to heal and get stronger at your own pace - then you will know what route to take

Take care of yourself and you are in my thoughts luvvy

xxx

Puddleduck · Mar 10th, 2009, 07:59 AM

Hey Anna,

Just wanted to repeat what the other girls have said really. Time is a great healer but you will never forget your little ones. Take time out to grieve and take it one day at a time. TTC can be very lonely, I know I have days where I do feel so alone and nothing anyone can say can make me feel any better. It does however give you the strength to carry on knowing you have such a big support group here on B&B.

Sending you big

take care xxx

Rumpskin · Mar 10th, 2009, 08:12 AM

I know exactly how you feel lovely. I do promise that time does help you in moving forward with your life.

I conceived in November 2007 and miscarriaged in January 2008. I then went on to conceive in August 2008 and again miscarriaged in November 2008. It took me 3 months with both to come to terms with my losses and to get myself back on track and think, this is not going stop me getting my dream. It is the most heartbreaking thing to go through and you never ever forget what could have been.

You will regain the strength and hopefully, fulfill your dream too xxxx

Mar 9th, 2009, 18:20 PM	#1
aflight84 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Essex Posts: 4,457	Where do i belong?! Hey Girls, Not really sure where i belong anymore as most of you know I lost the twins last week one was ectopic the other miscarriage it's a week tomorrow and i'm dreading waking up in the morning. I don't know how i'm going to feel each morning is different. I wanted a baby so bad and as soon as i got the littlest glimps it was over i don't know how i'm going to try again i was verging on wanting to give up before! It's 2 years in April and with every month that passes i loose more hope. What should I do? What will keep me going? Anna x

Status: Offline

Mar 9th, 2009, 18:42 PM	#2
claire99991 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: uk Posts: 8,626	Hey babe im so sorry this has happend to you life is so cruel!! as time goes on i think you will regain your strength to carry on with your journey, Give yourself time hun i think u will know when the time is right to start again, i know i have only been trying coming up to my 10th cycle now and i feel guilty for whinging as i know lots of people including you have been trying so much longer but i do know how this emotional rollercoaster can get you down its awful, i have no been told by my doc that this journey for me is likely to continue for sumtime its going to be tough to get me a sticky bean and i ask myself if i have the strength to see it thru, the answer is i dont know at the min i will carry on. You have so many ppl on there that care about you they will help you with the strength you need to carry on. XXXXXX (take time to grieve for your babies, lots of hugs for you xx)

Status: Offline

Mar 9th, 2009, 18:47 PM	#3
Tory123 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Essex Posts: 332	Hi Hun I have not got the answers for you as can't imagine what you are going through. All I know from what I have read that in a number of different groups everyone thinks alot of you and you can be where ever feel you can get the most support.

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 04:57 AM	#4
HAYS Other Inactive Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: East Sussex Posts: 5,265	Hey lovely, im so very sorry for what you have been through. Life just isnt fair sometimes hun, but I promise you, you will be blessed with a baby. Hard to see that at the moment, but with the support of everyone around you, you will feel better xxx

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 05:44 AM	#5
aflight84 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Essex Posts: 4,457	Hey Girls, Thanks for your messages. It is so strange the way i'm feeling right now, when i came out of hospital and saw all the messages on here i'd never felt so lonely yet so loved in all my life. x x x

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 06:08 AM	#6
maz Trying to conceive (TTC) BnB Addict Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: In IVF limbo ... Posts: 3,915	Hi hun I am soooo sorry for your losses. I too lost a baby very early on, but obviously our circumstances are very different, so on the one hand I know something of how you feel, but on the other, I have no idea of what you're going through, or what the future holds for you. What I do know, is that it does get easier as the days go by, and you will know when the time is right to start trying again. As for where you belong, you belong with the people that love you - your family, your DH - and your friends on bnb will be here when you need them too. I hope you start to heal soon - take the time you need, and don't rush it. You will never forget your little babies, but you will start to come to terms with them not being here. Good luck and for you and your DH...

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 06:36 AM	#7
Tracie87 Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: May 2008 Location: In a pineapple Posts: 10,064	hunni you belong here with us, youl never be lost with us in here.. At the moment the time will drag and youl feel so bad, but in time it does start to ease. with the love of your hubby and the friendship of great people. It took me ages 2 get over it but with time and help i got there we love u anna xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 07:17 AM	#8
Bexy Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: London Posts: 360	Hi Anna, I can only repeat all the lovely messages above and say that you belong wherever you want to be!!! Life is v.v.cruel and the people that are most deserving get overlooked with the intervention of horrible fate! Its like others said, you need to take time to heal and get stronger at your own pace - then you will know what route to take Take care of yourself and you are in my thoughts luvvy xxx

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 07:59 AM	#9
Puddleduck Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: UK, West Midlands Posts: 380	Hey Anna, Just wanted to repeat what the other girls have said really. Time is a great healer but you will never forget your little ones. Take time out to grieve and take it one day at a time. TTC can be very lonely, I know I have days where I do feel so alone and nothing anyone can say can make me feel any better. It does however give you the strength to carry on knowing you have such a big support group here on B&B. Sending you big take care xxx

Status: Offline

Mar 10th, 2009, 08:12 AM	#10
Rumpskin Other BnB Addict Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 7,261	I know exactly how you feel lovely. I do promise that time does help you in moving forward with your life. I conceived in November 2007 and miscarriaged in January 2008. I then went on to conceive in August 2008 and again miscarriaged in November 2008. It took me 3 months with both to come to terms with my losses and to get myself back on track and think, this is not going stop me getting my dream. It is the most heartbreaking thing to go through and you never ever forget what could have been. You will regain the strength and hopefully, fulfill your dream too xxxx

Status: Offline

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