Oh sorry mago I didn't hold her yet. It's going to be a while at least another week or two until we star kangaroo care. I cradled her in my hands in the incubator. I didn't actually hold her.
But she's still having a bit of a rough time and it's because her lungs are not maturing. I guess the doctor wants to talk to me tomorrow to discuss giving her some meds for her lungs so i'm a little scared as to why they need our approval.. Im a little worried about the side effects.. But I will find out when I go tomorrow what's going on with that.. But not much has changed right now she's still fighting hard though! Her day started off good but now she's still going up and down with her saturation and oxygen levels. I really hope they can smooth this out soon I hate that she's having such a rough time. Her PDA was fixed and she should be feeling better but she's not. It just makes me feel so helpless and sad for her I keep resenting that stupid infection. If there was no infection she would be ok!!! It's frustrating
Aww, im sure everything will be fine! try to stay strong for little Angelynn. Like I said in your other thread, my little baby was in an incubator and not well at birth, but nowhere near as bad as your little one, yet I was a wreck! I can't imagine how you must be feeling. Please try to be positive as Ersurgeongirl said, im sure it is hard for you, but your little girl is a fighter.
You are an outstanding mom. Your little girl knows that already and you make her feel better. You should be very proud. I hope your husband is feeling okay too... You guys are very brave and obviously so is your cutie pie! My partner and I are really thinking of you 3...
Thank you so much ladies your kind words and support brings tears to my eyes. It truly does mean so much to me.
Saw Angel last night and they had given her a blood transfusion but they had to put a line in through her head That way they can keep giving her blood anytime if she needs it. But it seemed to help her a great deal her oxygen levels were down to 57!!!! But she really doesn't like that needle thing in her head. She kept putting her hand up by it and almost seemed like she was going to pull it out LOL she's getting so strong though. She was actually pushing her body up off her bed and was wriggling up the nurse had to keep repositioning the ventalitator tube. She was so squirmy. But it's awesome to see that
And they saved her hair for me so it's like her first haircut. I thought that was so sweet that made me so happy She kept opening her eyes and for a few seconds she was looking right at me as I was talking to her and it made my knees weak. I can tell she was focused on me because her eyes were open and not moving. Babies just have rapid eye movement and can't really control it. She has such beautiful deep blue eyes!!! Infortunately i'm still just a big fuzzy blob and will be for quite a while but I think it's amazing that she can even tell!!!!
Anyways we'll be going back today after lunch to talk to the doctors and see what is going to happen with these meds and her lungs. Hopefully it's nothing too serious. I will let you all know
Also I never mentioned that I have a yeast infection and strept throat now...
I tell you I don't know what else I could go through. First was my cold, then labour and delivery, then infection, then I got nasty cold sores all over my lips (I get one little cold sore every few months and these attacked me full force) and now this!!! I'm actually not upset I'm finding it quite humurous. So now I have to become a super anti-germ girl and wash my hands all the time and carry hand sanitizer in my purse. Maybe it's a hint for me to stay home and sleep more. But damnit I want to shop! LOL
But my scar is healing up the doctor looked at it yesterday. The purple/red color will go away about a year after and also the numbness I feel won't totally dissapear for like a year! I've already tried shaving where it's numb feeling but it really bothers me. Pretty weird....But it's starting to look more like a scar now almost all the scabs are gone. This is the biggest thing I have ever gone through. I've never had stitches or a broken bone in my life!!! But I know it's there because of Angel and I would proudly show it off but that wouldn't be appropriate hehehe. Anyways enough babbling for today
I keep resenting that stupid infection. If there was no infection she would be ok!!! It's frustrating 
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