bROOKE_xO

I know its these hormones, but im so lonely.. I just need to vent
I live in Florida and my baby's father lives in Ohio. For anyone that lives in the US, you would know thats about 4 states away (we met in school in South Carolina 2 years ago.) It was love at first sight and we have been together ever since. When we each moved back home, we decided to stay together and try to make this work. We fly back and forth to see eachother every month for a couple weeks. We have been doing this "long distance" thing for about a year now. He still lives in Ohio as of right now (he has been in and out of some legal trouble for a while and cant move out of the state until his program is completed.. we are crossing our fingers for early September - being as the baby is due October.) So our plan is he will be moving down to Florida to be with me and the baby as soon as he can.

This pregnancy has just been so hard without him. I see him ALMOST every month still for a week, but its hard not having him be able to go to the doctors appointments with me, or kiss my belly, I have just felt really lonely through this. My mom has been great though - being my main support. He still calls me every night to see how im doing and how the baby is. It was VERY rocky the first couple months, he didnt stay out of trouble - basically showed no responsiblity a 'father-to-be' would have. The last couple of months, it seems he has taken intrest and really wants to be there. I just miss him so much and I hate this long distance thing! I want to blame him for getting in trouble and not being able to be down here sooner. He needs to pass his next drug test in order to move down here. He says hes clean - but deep down I really dont know and his parents feel the same way. I guess we'll see what the test has to say! He knows the consequences of what will happen if he doesnt stop getting in trouble and he says he wants to see his son born more than anything, but honestly - i really dont know if thats going to happen or not.

Ahh Its just been hard doing this by myself so far.
Sorry, I guess this is just one of those emotional rants!
Is anyone else having to do this alone?

xHx

Awww sorry babe. I am lucky and not doing this alone but if it makes you feel any better I still find it quite lonely. Although my OH lives with me I don't think he really understands the strain and hard work involved in pregnancy before the baby is here!

I live close to my family who are all very supportive but forums like this one are so helpful. I don't really have any friends who have had children, I am the first of my close circle of mates so don't have anybody to talk to who has had a baby recently.

It must be hard for you though, I hope your fella steps up to the mark and passes the drugs test and that the family you want works out, but remember we are here if you need to spill your guts!!! x

bROOKE_xO

Thank you so much.
Its just been a rollercoster. Things have calmed down alot since last month, But its almost like im hoping for the best, but preparing for the worst.