Could Social Services Take My Baby Away? - Page 3

BethK · Mar 12th, 2010, 04:52 AM

No way, the only thing they will do if anything is write a letter to get you a house ffaster.

Sorry but if my mum saiid that to me, it'd be the last thing she ever did say to me!

beckibee · Mar 12th, 2010, 05:44 AM

Oh hun your mum sounds awful, and she is not right at all! Only if the baby is in danger of neglect or abuse can they do anything!! The social services are mostly there to help rather than split up families, and i am sure your health visitor will see your a loving family.
I had my nana say this to me when i was first pregnant, i was rather ill and on the sofa, i had not yet washed the dishes from breakfast and she came round and said to me that ya do realise that you will have people coming round and if your house is not tidy and your dishes not done they will take the baby off you! WTF it's crazy, the health visitors tell you not to do too much housework and not to worry, the most important thing is that you get rest rather than doing housework, that can wait. x

SarahSkasUK · Mar 12th, 2010, 06:45 AM

No this doesn't sound right to me. Cramped living conditions are uncomfortable and of course not ideal but they won't make you bad parents. Social Services will only intervene in such a dramatic way if you or your partner are a danger to the child. I can't believe your mum would say such a cruel thing to you...
You are trying to get rehoused and actually the health visitor might be able to push this through more quickly for you with the imminent arrival of a baby (even if you go into temporary accomodation first). Good luck, try not to listen to your mum.

RainbowDrop_x · Mar 12th, 2010, 06:49 AM

Nooo you're mum's just trying to scare you hun.. Social services don't take children because conditions are cramped. If there was a violence problem or drug problem then yeah the HV probably would mention it to SS but not because it's cramped... If anything she/he will put a reccomendation in to the council or whoever deals with housing in you're area.. Don't worry hun you won't get you're baby taken off you

littledemonme · Mar 12th, 2010, 06:51 AM

One of the children in my class was 5 and still in a 1 bedroom flat with Mum and step Dad, social services were not even on the radar lovely - he was a very happy content little boy, well cared for, just with slightly cramped living arrangements. Unfortunately as for it putting you up the housing list - that may well depend on your area but in ours it made NO difference.
I'm sure there are people who work in social services on this site who will tell you it's rubbish - social services primary aim is to keep families together!

Kitty23 · Mar 12th, 2010, 06:55 AM

Poor you, but your mum is talking crap!

My sister had her, her partner and 3 children living in a 3 bedroom flat because of the council house waiting list the only thing the Health Visitor did was send a letter to the council trying to bump them up the list. So please don't worry they won't take your baby away just because its a bit cramped at home

xxx

sophieloafy · Mar 12th, 2010, 07:18 AM

Your mum is NOT right at all!!!!!!!

When the health visitor comes and sees how you are all living she will do her upmost to help you find a place to live, she will write a letter to your local housing office and you will be prioritised.... i was in the very same situation as you once,so take my word for it hun

Health visitors are there to help and not hinder you, keep calm, dont let people scare you ok, and i am SURE you will be fine. I know its easy for me to say that, but i KNOW you will get a lot of help

You can also go to your gp and her him/her to write you a recomendation for your health and the babies. ALSO you could go to your local citizens advice beureux. They have a team of people who can help you through anything.

All the best hun, we will all keep our fingers crossed

LulaBug · Mar 12th, 2010, 07:34 AM

Thanks so much for your advice and lovely words. It's eased my mind loads.

I'll be speaking to my mum later on and telling her that she's wrong and I'm not happy with the fact she caused me to worry like that. It's not fair. I don't need the stress of worrying whether my child will be taken off me.
I know it what it's like to be put in care and the thought of history repeating itself just freaks me out. I don't want that for my son, but thankfully by the sounds of it, it won't happen.

Thank you all so much

xxx

Sam9kids · Mar 12th, 2010, 07:48 AM

Agree with the others hun (((hugs))) xxx

555ann555 · Mar 12th, 2010, 10:33 AM

Awww sweetheart. What a thing for your mum to say to you

I supposed you've got to hope that you're mum just wrongly believed in what she was saying. Maybe it was different when she was involved with them back in the day, or maybe she's convinced herself the only issue then was her living conditions... Whatever the case is it wasn't very fair for her to scare you like that.

I'm pretty sure everyone here has convinced you SS and your HV are there to help you get what you need for your wee boy, not to steal him away from his loving home.

Mar 12th, 2010, 04:52 AM	#21
BethK Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Gloucestershire, UK Posts: 2,302	No way, the only thing they will do if anything is write a letter to get you a house ffaster. Sorry but if my mum saiid that to me, it'd be the last thing she ever did say to me!

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 05:44 AM	#22
beckibee Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: derbyshire Posts: 197	Oh hun your mum sounds awful, and she is not right at all! Only if the baby is in danger of neglect or abuse can they do anything!! The social services are mostly there to help rather than split up families, and i am sure your health visitor will see your a loving family. I had my nana say this to me when i was first pregnant, i was rather ill and on the sofa, i had not yet washed the dishes from breakfast and she came round and said to me that ya do realise that you will have people coming round and if your house is not tidy and your dishes not done they will take the baby off you! WTF it's crazy, the health visitors tell you not to do too much housework and not to worry, the most important thing is that you get rest rather than doing housework, that can wait. x

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 06:45 AM	#23
SarahSkasUK Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 114	No this doesn't sound right to me. Cramped living conditions are uncomfortable and of course not ideal but they won't make you bad parents. Social Services will only intervene in such a dramatic way if you or your partner are a danger to the child. I can't believe your mum would say such a cruel thing to you... You are trying to get rehoused and actually the health visitor might be able to push this through more quickly for you with the imminent arrival of a baby (even if you go into temporary accomodation first). Good luck, try not to listen to your mum.

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 06:49 AM	#24
RainbowDrop_x Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: United Kingdom Posts: 7,727	Nooo you're mum's just trying to scare you hun.. Social services don't take children because conditions are cramped. If there was a violence problem or drug problem then yeah the HV probably would mention it to SS but not because it's cramped... If anything she/he will put a reccomendation in to the council or whoever deals with housing in you're area.. Don't worry hun you won't get you're baby taken off you

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 06:51 AM	#25
littledemonme Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 568	One of the children in my class was 5 and still in a 1 bedroom flat with Mum and step Dad, social services were not even on the radar lovely - he was a very happy content little boy, well cared for, just with slightly cramped living arrangements. Unfortunately as for it putting you up the housing list - that may well depend on your area but in ours it made NO difference. I'm sure there are people who work in social services on this site who will tell you it's rubbish - social services primary aim is to keep families together!

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 06:55 AM	#26
Kitty23 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: South East, UK Posts: 2,152	Poor you, but your mum is talking crap! My sister had her, her partner and 3 children living in a 3 bedroom flat because of the council house waiting list the only thing the Health Visitor did was send a letter to the council trying to bump them up the list. So please don't worry they won't take your baby away just because its a bit cramped at home xxx

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 07:18 AM	#27
sophieloafy Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 389	Your mum is NOT right at all!!!!!!! When the health visitor comes and sees how you are all living she will do her upmost to help you find a place to live, she will write a letter to your local housing office and you will be prioritised.... i was in the very same situation as you once,so take my word for it hun Health visitors are there to help and not hinder you, keep calm, dont let people scare you ok, and i am SURE you will be fine. I know its easy for me to say that, but i KNOW you will get a lot of help You can also go to your gp and her him/her to write you a recomendation for your health and the babies. ALSO you could go to your local citizens advice beureux. They have a team of people who can help you through anything. All the best hun, we will all keep our fingers crossed

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 07:34 AM	#28
LulaBug Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Kent Posts: 2,115	Thanks so much for your advice and lovely words. It's eased my mind loads. I'll be speaking to my mum later on and telling her that she's wrong and I'm not happy with the fact she caused me to worry like that. It's not fair. I don't need the stress of worrying whether my child will be taken off me. I know it what it's like to be put in care and the thought of history repeating itself just freaks me out. I don't want that for my son, but thankfully by the sounds of it, it won't happen. Thank you all so much xxx

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 07:48 AM	#29
Sam9kids Pregnant (Expecting) BnB Addict Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Cheshire, UK Posts: 4,928	Agree with the others hun (((hugs))) xxx

Status: Offline

Mar 12th, 2010, 10:33 AM	#30
555ann555 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: North Lanarkshire Posts: 1,751	Awww sweetheart. What a thing for your mum to say to you I supposed you've got to hope that you're mum just wrongly believed in what she was saying. Maybe it was different when she was involved with them back in the day, or maybe she's convinced herself the only issue then was her living conditions... Whatever the case is it wasn't very fair for her to scare you like that. I'm pretty sure everyone here has convinced you SS and your HV are there to help you get what you need for your wee boy, not to steal him away from his loving home.

Status: Offline

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