Childbirth is as easy as falling off a log - Page 3

saturn73 · Mar 7th, 2010, 17:26 PM

Knowledge is power, that is correct! However, in my case ignorance is bliss! I really went into my last two labours with a sort of "what happens happens" type of attitude, and it really helped! Not that I didn't have an idea as to what to expect, but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do. :-) I also didn't have a lot of expectations of how things absolutely had to be, and as such I felt great with the outcome!

daisyfflur · Mar 7th, 2010, 17:37 PM

Great article. Still scared witless though.

madasa · Mar 7th, 2010, 19:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do.

Exactly! Agree 100%. You are a wiser lady than me... I didn't have that confidence in myself and my body, and I don't think I am unusual either. Lots of ladies are scared of birth.... but knowing this stuff can alleviate that fear and give you confidence.

It's so important that all our choices are informed ones, and that can't happen if you're ignorant. Sometimes it means saying "no" to a midwife or consultant.... So many women are hussled into a choice they would rather not make, due to a blanket policy. You see it ALL. THE. TIME. "they won't let me..." "I have to do X because..." No. There IS no "allow" or "have to". It's called bodily autonomy: NO ONE owns your body, except YOU - not even a doctor or midwife!

JASMAK · Mar 7th, 2010, 19:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madasa

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do.

Exactly! Agree 100%. You are a wiser lady than me... I didn't have that confidence in myself and my body, and I don't think I am unusual either. Lots of ladies are scared of birth.... but knowing this stuff can alleviate that fear and give you confidence.

It's so important that all our choices are informed ones, and that can't happen if you're ignorant. Sometimes it means saying "no" to a midwife or consultant.... So many women are hussled into a choice they would rather not make, due to a blanket policy. You see it ALL. THE. TIME. "they won't let me..." "I have to do X because..." No. There IS no "allow" or "have to". It's called bodily autonomy: NO ONE owns your body, except YOU - not even a doctor or midwife!

Wow, I always thought since the UK had midwives, that the birthing experiences would be better. I must say, that although I myself, had sections, I never felt like I never had a choice or options. I was always given all the facts, and risks to both options, and I made the final decisions in the end...and never once felt pressured. No one is ever shoving their expectations down my throat, and we have a "family-centered" maternity ward where family, friends and siblings are welcome. They are private rooms with bathtubs. I watched my sister and best friend give birth in the same hospital, and never once did I see anyone try to make them do anything unless the mother asked, including pain meds. The hospital wants your "birth plan" and try to follow it. My OB/GYN is very relaxed and unintrusive. I guess things are very different depending on where you live. I sure hope that those of you who have felt "forced" have a smoother process this time.

Tashry · Mar 7th, 2010, 20:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madasa

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tashry

Thanks for posting! I took a quick read through and have to agree with most of what what said.
In my own personal experience, while I was induced and had my baby in the hospital, I went into labor with a very open mind. I was not adverse to drug intervention, but didn't go in thinking I have to have drugs or even that I don't want drugs. I made absolutely no birth plan, other than my plan to roll with the punches. I went into my own little world, did what felt right for my body (which even included doing a sort of hula dance type thing in the middle of the hospital hallway while I was walking lol) and found it to be a very pleasant (for lack of a better word) experience. I had a 10 pound son in a total of 5 and a half hours, using only gas as my drug. I never once felt out of control or that the pain was too much to handle.
I think that many women go into labor with a specific plan or idea of how they want things to go, but if you aren't willing to be open minded and do what feels right, you will end up with more pain and problems.

I also went in with an open mind and no plan last time, but it didn't go well for me... Way too much intervention to allow labour and birth to progress in a normal, physiological fashion, not being allowed to move, being stuck on my back, strapped to a bed and monitors... So this time i Have a plan... I am willing to be open minded as well, but I want as little intervention as possible and I want the atmosphere to be kept quiet and peaceful.... so my plan is centred around that.

I'm sure it couldn't have been easy with a lot of intervention. I was very lucky, the nurse and doctor I had were also very open minded. I was never confined to my bed until it was time to push - in the meantime I was free to walk the halls, kneel in the shower, sit on a birthing ball...whatever I needed. It was not until the very end that I ended up in bed, and even then I was free to find a position that worked for me.
I think your plan is a good one. I plan on going into this labor the same as I did last time - with the exception of bringing my iPod this time. Last time I had my mom and hubby with me and just hearing them talk drove me insane. I want to be solely focused on my own thoughts and body - not hearing people talking to me and asking how I am every two minutes. I'd rather hear some relaxing or inspirational music instead.

madasa · Mar 8th, 2010, 06:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASMAK

Quote:

Originally Posted by madasa

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do.

Exactly! Agree 100%. You are a wiser lady than me... I didn't have that confidence in myself and my body, and I don't think I am unusual either. Lots of ladies are scared of birth.... but knowing this stuff can alleviate that fear and give you confidence.

It's so important that all our choices are informed ones, and that can't happen if you're ignorant. Sometimes it means saying "no" to a midwife or consultant.... So many women are hussled into a choice they would rather not make, due to a blanket policy. You see it ALL. THE. TIME. "they won't let me..." "I have to do X because..." No. There IS no "allow" or "have to". It's called bodily autonomy: NO ONE owns your body, except YOU - not even a doctor or midwife!

Wow, I always thought since the UK had midwives, that the birthing experiences would be better. I must say, that although I myself, had sections, I never felt like I never had a choice or options. I was always given all the facts, and risks to both options, and I made the final decisions in the end...and never once felt pressured. No one is ever shoving their expectations down my throat, and we have a "family-centered" maternity ward where family, friends and siblings are welcome. They are private rooms with bathtubs. I watched my sister and best friend give birth in the same hospital, and never once did I see anyone try to make them do anything unless the mother asked, including pain meds. The hospital wants your "birth plan" and try to follow it. My OB/GYN is very relaxed and unintrusive. I guess things are very different depending on where you live. I sure hope that those of you who have felt "forced" have a smoother process this time.

I think we are better of than ladies in the US, (I think) but there are blanket policies and sometimes bad advice given.... I'm noticing that HCPs in some areas are just not pro-HB for example and try to pressure you to birth in a hosp. even tho it is your right to birth wherever YOU want to. And many women just meekly go along with drs orders, thinking "well, they know best...." and end up not having a good birth or the experience they want. A lot of women don't even KNOW that it is THEIR RIGHT to say "no, THIS is what I am going to do", or "NO, I don't want that procedure thank you". They just go along with it... and it's not always in the best interest of mum and baby.

madasa · Mar 8th, 2010, 06:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tashry

Quote:

Originally Posted by madasa

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tashry

Thanks for posting! I took a quick read through and have to agree with most of what what said.
In my own personal experience, while I was induced and had my baby in the hospital, I went into labor with a very open mind. I was not adverse to drug intervention, but didn't go in thinking I have to have drugs or even that I don't want drugs. I made absolutely no birth plan, other than my plan to roll with the punches. I went into my own little world, did what felt right for my body (which even included doing a sort of hula dance type thing in the middle of the hospital hallway while I was walking lol) and found it to be a very pleasant (for lack of a better word) experience. I had a 10 pound son in a total of 5 and a half hours, using only gas as my drug. I never once felt out of control or that the pain was too much to handle.
I think that many women go into labor with a specific plan or idea of how they want things to go, but if you aren't willing to be open minded and do what feels right, you will end up with more pain and problems.

I also went in with an open mind and no plan last time, but it didn't go well for me... Way too much intervention to allow labour and birth to progress in a normal, physiological fashion, not being allowed to move, being stuck on my back, strapped to a bed and monitors... So this time i Have a plan... I am willing to be open minded as well, but I want as little intervention as possible and I want the atmosphere to be kept quiet and peaceful.... so my plan is centred around that.

I'm sure it couldn't have been easy with a lot of intervention. I was very lucky, the nurse and doctor I had were also very open minded. I was never confined to my bed until it was time to push - in the meantime I was free to walk the halls, kneel in the shower, sit on a birthing ball...whatever I needed. It was not until the very end that I ended up in bed, and even then I was free to find a position that worked for me.
I think your plan is a good one. I plan on going into this labor the same as I did last time - with the exception of bringing my iPod this time. Last time I had my mom and hubby with me and just hearing them talk drove me insane. I want to be solely focused on my own thoughts and body - not hearing people talking to me and asking how I am every two minutes. I'd rather hear some relaxing or inspirational music instead.

Last time I had MIL there, and she is such a worrier... so that didn't help. Even now she'll say things like "ooo you had such a hard time..." and I don't want to hear that.

My birth plan is as much for my dh and whoever else is there, as for the medical types. I've put down that I want minimal interventions/exams, the noise and light kept to a bare minimum, no talking/talking in low voices, and no negative words like "pain", "hurting", "hard work". All that is going to do is burst my positive bubble and make me frightened and tense.

saturn73 · Mar 8th, 2010, 07:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASMAK

Quote:

Originally Posted by madasa

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do.

Exactly! Agree 100%. You are a wiser lady than me... I didn't have that confidence in myself and my body, and I don't think I am unusual either. Lots of ladies are scared of birth.... but knowing this stuff can alleviate that fear and give you confidence.

It's so important that all our choices are informed ones, and that can't happen if you're ignorant. Sometimes it means saying "no" to a midwife or consultant.... So many women are hussled into a choice they would rather not make, due to a blanket policy. You see it ALL. THE. TIME. "they won't let me..." "I have to do X because..." No. There IS no "allow" or "have to". It's called bodily autonomy: NO ONE owns your body, except YOU - not even a doctor or midwife!

Wow, I always thought since the UK had midwives, that the birthing experiences would be better. I must say, that although I myself, had sections, I never felt like I never had a choice or options. I was always given all the facts, and risks to both options, and I made the final decisions in the end...and never once felt pressured. No one is ever shoving their expectations down my throat, and we have a "family-centered" maternity ward where family, friends and siblings are welcome. They are private rooms with bathtubs. I watched my sister and best friend give birth in the same hospital, and never once did I see anyone try to make them do anything unless the mother asked, including pain meds. The hospital wants your "birth plan" and try to follow it. My OB/GYN is very relaxed and unintrusive. I guess things are very different depending on where you live. I sure hope that those of you who have felt "forced" have a smoother process this time.

The midwife thing doesn't mean much. They're also the norm here, and as such, are pretty much just like a regular doctor back home.

Everything here in Europe is tougher IMO, even giving birth. People don't purposely try to be more pushy or judgemental, they just are.

We definitely do get "babied" in Canada (had my first two there). It was heavenly, if you can describe it that way!

greenlady · Mar 8th, 2010, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JessiHD

My friend said it was like shelling peas! She's great to talk to when feeling nervous about labour.

Can I just ask, what does she mean by this? just boring and laborious?

JASMAK · Mar 8th, 2010, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

Quote:

Originally Posted by JASMAK

Quote:

Originally Posted by madasa

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do.

Exactly! Agree 100%. You are a wiser lady than me... I didn't have that confidence in myself and my body, and I don't think I am unusual either. Lots of ladies are scared of birth.... but knowing this stuff can alleviate that fear and give you confidence.

It's so important that all our choices are informed ones, and that can't happen if you're ignorant. Sometimes it means saying "no" to a midwife or consultant.... So many women are hussled into a choice they would rather not make, due to a blanket policy. You see it ALL. THE. TIME. "they won't let me..." "I have to do X because..." No. There IS no "allow" or "have to". It's called bodily autonomy: NO ONE owns your body, except YOU - not even a doctor or midwife!

Wow, I always thought since the UK had midwives, that the birthing experiences would be better. I must say, that although I myself, had sections, I never felt like I never had a choice or options. I was always given all the facts, and risks to both options, and I made the final decisions in the end...and never once felt pressured. No one is ever shoving their expectations down my throat, and we have a "family-centered" maternity ward where family, friends and siblings are welcome. They are private rooms with bathtubs. I watched my sister and best friend give birth in the same hospital, and never once did I see anyone try to make them do anything unless the mother asked, including pain meds. The hospital wants your "birth plan" and try to follow it. My OB/GYN is very relaxed and unintrusive. I guess things are very different depending on where you live. I sure hope that those of you who have felt "forced" have a smoother process this time.

The midwife thing doesn't mean much. They're also the norm here, and as such, are pretty much just like a regular doctor back home.

Everything here in Europe is tougher IMO, even giving birth. People don't purposely try to be more pushy or judgemental, they just are.

We definitely do get "babied" in Canada (had my first two there). It was heavenly, if you can describe it that way!

Well, that's good to know that we have it good here. I honestly just always thought that the UK had miwives and were therefore, so much more advanced. But, then the more I hear about "horror births" over there, the more confused I got about it. LOL! It is good to hear from someone who is Canadian living over there. I guess you probably wish you were back here then??? I wish you all the luck, and I hope it goes well for you.

Oh, just edited to add to your "babied" comment. It reminded me of this nurse on my ward. I was itchy from some of the meds from my section, so she got me a bottle of lotion. Expecting to put it on myself, I went to grab it, and she said, "no no, you just gave birth...lay down" and she proceeded to not only put lotion on me, but massage my legs and back with it aswell. It was so nice and way beyond what she ever would have been expected to do.

Mar 7th, 2010, 17:26 PM	#21
saturn73 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,102	Knowledge is power, that is correct! However, in my case ignorance is bliss! I really went into my last two labours with a sort of "what happens happens" type of attitude, and it really helped! Not that I didn't have an idea as to what to expect, but more like I sort of left it up to my body and rested in knowing that I would instinctively know what to do. :-) I also didn't have a lot of expectations of how things absolutely had to be, and as such I felt great with the outcome!

Status: Offline

Mar 7th, 2010, 17:37 PM	#22
daisyfflur Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Wiltshire Posts: 679	Great article. Still scared witless though.

Status: Offline

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