DH has just decided that he wants to be with me while I'm in labour and giving birth - all this time, I have though my mum will be with me as DH is easily scared lol.

So,

Can anyone share some tips for birthing partners so they too can prepare for the birth?

He keeps asking me, what will he have to do when he is there. And all I can say is, "massage my back and just do what I say"...but seriously, I've never been in labour before so don't really know how much a birthing partner has to go through.

Can anyone help?

Heya hun,

All he will need is a strong shield to block off the punches and kicks and earplugs for the swears lol.....

Sorry I aint much help....my OH just sat next 2 me last time, rubbed my back and held my hand (luckily for his sake it was an easy labour & birth)...

Hope things go nice and easy for you!! x x x

there are things that can be done to help prior to the birth like the perineal massage

I would make him watch a video or two of women in labor so he knows what to expect. The 1 thing I've told DH (it's his first my third) is to not forget to count for me while I'm pushing. The nurse always told me to push to the count of 10 and if no one is counting aloud (or silly man forgets and stops counting halfway through like my ex would do) it feels like the pushing may just last forever. When I finally got my ex to stay focused and keep counting it made it easier because I knew it was almost time to stop and breathe. I've told DH that if he stops counting I will stop pushing and the nurse will yell at him. lol

make him watch one born every minute

do not let them touch your legs while in labour everything from bump down gets very sensitive !! my OH tried stroking my leg i punched it off while i was on the gas and air so make sure they stay above bump x

Its not really a tip but my OH is worried he'll panic & faint because he thinks I'll be in distress & won't be able to do anything about it.

But you can't be trying to keep him happy whilst your in hospital so I'd first make sure that he realises exactly whats going on medically so he understands that any suffering on your part isn't necessarily a 'negative' thing (all a natural process and all hehe), a good long explanation of how long tiring experiences might make you be a bit more hostile than usual (so he doesn't get upset if he tries to help and gets rejected) & a few things he can do to help to stop feeling so helpless (ie getting water, using portable fan, wiping face... kind of boring things but things above the waist hehe or as jess_smurf said you might get a bit vicious)

I'm first time too so can't speak from any experience, its just what I imagine I could do beforehand so that my partner feels more preparedxx

Those are definitely great gems of wisdom there, especially him being informed himself of the stages of labor and what to possibly expect during them...that things get more intense and the time of labor can really vary....to do those massages when you need, just be there for you and be supportive. I think the number one thing is for him to be informed of the process ahead of time so it's not a foreign concept to him, and as said, so that he understands childbirth is an altered state of consciousness for a woman and not to take anything personally and just do the best he can to encourage and support.

I *personally* also have told my husband I prefer he stays up top near my head and not be gawking down below, and he fortunately agrees, lol...I wouldn't lose sleep if he did see loads going on down there but we both really just prefer not. Some guys really want to see the whole process though and don't mind, so it's entirely individual. I just want him to support *me* while the medical people do their job down below, LOL

is it worth going though the antinatial class again with him?

The antenatal class in my area (according to my SIL) is not helpful at all. Just one class with basic info.