BP needs to be totally on board with your wishes and preferences beforehand so they can stick up for you when you are vulnerable and distracted.... get them to go through your birth plan with you so they know what you want and why you want it.... then they can help you get the birth you want.

Oh has been watching 'One Born Every Minute' with me, not necessarily a good thing, bless him! I havent done this before either so not completely sure but the one thing we have done is discuss my birthplan so he knows the important stuff like how far I can move my legs because of SPD, that he wants to cut cord, skin to skin with baby and that we agree we want the baby to have Vit K injection rather than orally.... Just so if I am out of it he can assert our wishes really. We thought our antenatal class was going to be rubbish - and although I felt I knew most of it anyway (good old BnB!) he actually found it much more useful than he thought he would x

I don't think there is really much they can do, I would suggest for his sake u pack a change of clothing for him too! He could be in them a long time. X

Yeah, don't forget to pack him some snacks and something to drink too as he might be stuck without anything and you could be in a good while.

get the Birthwise Dvd you can find it online, it prepared my DH for dealing with me in labour, bascily while he was there i was 7cm+ as it was just mum till that point and i pretty much got in the pool right away after he arrived, he kept a cool flannel for my head and face and a cup of water and a cup of icechips handy and just sat next to the pool talking to me encouraging me and making me laugh between contractions, then when things stopped progressing and i got out of the pool he helped me get out and helped me onto the bed then had to step back and let the mw's and doctors have their space , he was by my head for a bit holding my hand but then mum swapped and he went to the "other end " and watched the actual birth, then came back to me when they placed DS on my chest and hugged and kissed me then went with DS while they measured him and checked him over and mum stayed while i was getting my stiches, then DH got DS dressed and got huggles etc.. while i showered up and then he dragged all my stuff to my post partum room and watched me feed then changed DS put him to bed in the bassinet and we talked for a bit with the MW then he went home with a list of stuff to bring back in the morning,

tbh DH wasnt much use in the early stages of labour at all my mum was much better but he was great when i was in the pool and afterwards

I'm also packing some hand held video games for my DH. He's extremely energetic (like a 5 yr old would be if they drank a red bull) so I know he's going to be bouncing off the walls and be bored quite a bit if things move slowly. If he starts getting bored and impatient it will annoy the hell out of me so I need to make sure he has something else to do just in case. I may even bring some games I like since they are good at clearing my head a bit if I get stressed out.

Last time around with my OH I made sure we had a book packed for him just incase, for the actual final time at the hospital of course he didn't have a chance to read any but it was there during our other too'ing and fro'ing while I dilated enough.

If my OH could offer any advise (which he can't as he is in work lol) would be prepared to also ache after delivery. Due to the positions I chose to give birth in he had to support alot of my weight on his arms, I was squatting for half and then knelt leaning forward on the floor. For a few days after the birth he could hardly lift his arms up to his shoulders

I'd suggest he packs a bag for himself with a change of clothes, snacks and drinks because he will be better able to support you if he has the things he will need to hand.

It would be a good idea to go through your birthplan with him because once you are in the full swing of labour he may have to communicate your wishes for you. Other things to think about are:
- are you ok with being touched a lot when you're in pain or would you rather he didn't?
- do you want him to be in the room but quietly sitting in the corner or would you rather he was right at your bedside/birthing poolside etc?
- if the baby has to be taken straight away to be checked over, do you want him to go with the baby or stay with you?
- is there anything he might do that will p*ss you off - eg. I banned my OH from using his iPhone to call/text/check emails while he was with me during labour (I'm normally not such a dragon but it would have really driven me mad for him to be tapping away on his phone while I was labouring)
- are there things you'd like him to do at certain intervals so that you don't have to keep asking for them? - eg. get him to offer you a drink of water/a snack every so often
- would you like him to be firm and direct with you or would you rather he was very gentle and soft in his manner with you?

For the most part I thought I would just tell my husband what I wanted him to do while I was in labour, but once you are exhausted and zoned out you don't necessarily have the energy and presence of mind to communicate all of your needs.

Lx

I've just discussed this all with him, and now I'm worried he'll feel helpless! He really wants to be there to support me, but getting very apprehensive about it. He's suggested bringing my mum along with us, just incase he can't handle the pressure and turns out to be not much of a help. lol

I had MIL there, to support me (a woman who has been there sort of thing) but also to support him so he could better support me. I think that probably helped. Lois, those are all great suggestions, I am going to have a think about those... thanks!