Has anyone had a health visitor come round to see you before baby is born? - Page 3

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martz

OMG! thats awful hun!

When I had my daughter I didnt meet my HV until after the birth but she was awful..I really didnt like her very much and she made me feel so pressured to do things HER way! (as it was my 1st I believed that what she said was gospel!) She really made the first few months with my daughter difficult and stressful and I have vowed that this time round if i dont like my HV i will speak up and say something....or ask for a different HV! xxx

sorry to hear about your experience. You should be left feeling good and supported not anxious and stressed. Thats the opposite of the affect they're meant to have. And they are meant to be there to help you, not tell you what to do!!! I hope I don't have to see her again!!!

Sam9kids · Mar 2nd, 2010, 08:02 AM

Ooohh i wouldnt like that either!

And as for her turning up half an hour earlier!!!

Go and have a brew and count to 20 hun xxx

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam9kids

Ooohh i wouldnt like that either!

And as for her turning up half an hour earlier!!!

Go and have a brew and count to 20 hun xxx

Thanks Sam. Had a cup of tea. I ended up calling the health centre to say that I wanted to change health visitor. Decided there was no point in her being my health visitor, because the relationship/connection just isn't there and the whole point of a health visitor is having someone you find supportive to talk to about your baby or whatever. Don't think the person I spoke to was too happy about her arriving so early or for bringing a student nurse without asking my permission (not that I would have minded but it's nice to know who's coming round). So overall feel better about it.... just want positive interactions with people. I think its good to nip it in the bud now so I don't have it on my mind that I will have a visit from her later.xx

Kirsti · Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:34 AM

Where i live they come to visit 3 weeks before baby is born.
Oh mine is a right crouch! OH told her to politely remove herself from the house when she came to see me when first son was 14weeks. i remember the convo to well. She said "i hear your pregnant again" and i said yeah really pleased about it to. she ACTUALLY turned round and said "oh i was thinking you would want an abortion" I NEARLY choked! told her on no uncertain terms was i going to abort my baby! she never came back till i seen her for second baby meeting thing! xx

IvyBaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:45 AM

OMG!! What's wrong with them!! I dread having a visit from one of them now lol

mrsaligee · Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:50 AM

My midwife said at my 38-week appointment could she inform the health visitor that I was pregnant so that she could arrange to visit, though pointed out that this was most likely to be after the baby was born.

I then got a letter addressed to "parent or carer of" plus my name, which I found strange as I am probably one of the oldest mothers on this thread.

I was instructed to ring and arrange an appointment, which I have done three times, and have not had a response, whereas another girl in my town has already had her visit from the Health Visitor (pre-birth) and told me that she didn't get on with her at all.

I suppose I will have to ring a fourth time to find out what's going on!!!

Mrsaligee
x

KamKol · Mar 2nd, 2010, 13:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kirsti

Where i live they come to visit 3 weeks before baby is born.
Oh mine is a right crouch! OH told her to politely remove herself from the house when she came to see me when first son was 14weeks. i remember the convo to well. She said "i hear your pregnant again" and i said yeah really pleased about it to. she ACTUALLY turned round and said "oh i was thinking you would want an abortion" I NEARLY choked! told her on no uncertain terms was i going to abort my baby! she never came back till i seen her for second baby meeting thing! xx

I have no words...

saturn73 · Mar 2nd, 2010, 14:23 PM

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Originally Posted by surprisebaby

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

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Originally Posted by surprisebaby

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

I don't think mine will come until after I give birth. The way she was talking does sound a bit negative, although most of the time people don't mean to be offensive. Was she older? That could explain it (not an excuse, but a reason type of thing). :-)

Yeah she was about 60 or something but then I am 33!!! Its weird I am so used to the people I meet where I get my private scans (they are so nice and friendly) it was bizarre being treated as though you were struggling even though you're not.. Maybe she's like that with everyone, I don't know but I just didn't like her!!

Oh yeah, people rub me wrong all the time! LOL. My DH thinks I'm overly sensitive, but I tell him I just don't like rude and aggressive people!

glad it's not just me then!!!

It isn't just you! I seriously spend half my day thinking about other people's actions (usually being upset by them), and wondering if I'm being weird or over-reacting. I'm usually kind of touchy, but this pregnancy has made me even more so. I'd happily spend my day in bed if it were up to me, just to avoid other people!

saturn73 · Mar 2nd, 2010, 14:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KamKol

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kirsti

Where i live they come to visit 3 weeks before baby is born.
Oh mine is a right crouch! OH told her to politely remove herself from the house when she came to see me when first son was 14weeks. i remember the convo to well. She said "i hear your pregnant again" and i said yeah really pleased about it to. she ACTUALLY turned round and said "oh i was thinking you would want an abortion" I NEARLY choked! told her on no uncertain terms was i going to abort my baby! she never came back till i seen her for second baby meeting thing! xx

I have no words...

Holy crap!

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 14:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

Quote:

Originally Posted by surprisebaby

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

Quote:

Originally Posted by surprisebaby

Quote:

Originally Posted by saturn73

I don't think mine will come until after I give birth. The way she was talking does sound a bit negative, although most of the time people don't mean to be offensive. Was she older? That could explain it (not an excuse, but a reason type of thing). :-)

Yeah she was about 60 or something but then I am 33!!! Its weird I am so used to the people I meet where I get my private scans (they are so nice and friendly) it was bizarre being treated as though you were struggling even though you're not.. Maybe she's like that with everyone, I don't know but I just didn't like her!!

Oh yeah, people rub me wrong all the time! LOL. My DH thinks I'm overly sensitive, but I tell him I just don't like rude and aggressive people!

glad it's not just me then!!!

It isn't just you! I seriously spend half my day thinking about other people's actions (usually being upset by them), and wondering if I'm being weird or over-reacting. I'm usually kind of touchy, but this pregnancy has made me even more so. I'd happily spend my day in bed if it were up to me, just to avoid other people!

i feel the same. I am normally quite a people person, but pregnancy has brought out a more introverted version of myself, like a mad professor working on his experiments and staying in his study! I'm just really focused on the baby and I enjoy it. I just don't need interaction with others at the moment...some people just really annoy me at the moment!

Mar 2nd, 2010, 08:02 AM	#22
Sam9kids Pregnant (Expecting) BnB Addict Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Cheshire, UK Posts: 4,928	Ooohh i wouldnt like that either! And as for her turning up half an hour earlier!!! Go and have a brew and count to 20 hun xxx

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Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:34 AM	#24
Kirsti Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Berwick UK Posts: 864	Where i live they come to visit 3 weeks before baby is born. Oh mine is a right crouch! OH told her to politely remove herself from the house when she came to see me when first son was 14weeks. i remember the convo to well. She said "i hear your pregnant again" and i said yeah really pleased about it to. she ACTUALLY turned round and said "oh i was thinking you would want an abortion" I NEARLY choked! told her on no uncertain terms was i going to abort my baby! she never came back till i seen her for second baby meeting thing! xx

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Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:45 AM	#25
IvyBaby Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: London, SW11 Posts: 2,109	OMG!! What's wrong with them!! I dread having a visit from one of them now lol

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Mar 2nd, 2010, 11:50 AM	#26
mrsaligee Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 108	My midwife said at my 38-week appointment could she inform the health visitor that I was pregnant so that she could arrange to visit, though pointed out that this was most likely to be after the baby was born. I then got a letter addressed to "parent or carer of" plus my name, which I found strange as I am probably one of the oldest mothers on this thread. I was instructed to ring and arrange an appointment, which I have done three times, and have not had a response, whereas another girl in my town has already had her visit from the Health Visitor (pre-birth) and told me that she didn't get on with her at all. I suppose I will have to ring a fourth time to find out what's going on!!! Mrsaligee x

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