Has anyone had a health visitor come round to see you before baby is born? - Page 2

frouphea · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:09 AM

The Health Visitor came to see me while pregnant, because I was at increased risk of PND and PPP. It was helpful, knowing I had her support. It also meant she was able to see what 'normal' was for me, and notice quicker if there was a problem.

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:10 AM

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Originally Posted by blahblahblah

I don't think they don't usually come round before baby is born unless you are at higher risk of problems - physical or emotional. The only person I know who had an early visit had had some issues in the past which put her at a really high risk of PND. If you aren't aware of any reasons for the visit, it might be worth having a chat to your MW when you next see her to find out why.

I guess I can understand her asking so many probing questions in that scenario.

well she said the reason for the visit is just to introduce herself before the baby is born..... But to be honest, she didn't talk about herself that much just asked me lots of nosey questions...

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:11 AM

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Originally Posted by saturn73

Quote:

Originally Posted by surprisebaby

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Originally Posted by saturn73

I don't think mine will come until after I give birth. The way she was talking does sound a bit negative, although most of the time people don't mean to be offensive. Was she older? That could explain it (not an excuse, but a reason type of thing). :-)

Yeah she was about 60 or something but then I am 33!!! Its weird I am so used to the people I meet where I get my private scans (they are so nice and friendly) it was bizarre being treated as though you were struggling even though you're not.. Maybe she's like that with everyone, I don't know but I just didn't like her!!

Oh yeah, people rub me wrong all the time! LOL. My DH thinks I'm overly sensitive, but I tell him I just don't like rude and aggressive people!

glad it's not just me then!!!

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beckibee

Its bad enough when its people you know saying "oooh you wont have a life now you have a baby on the way", but i suppose from a professional is even worse having lots of negativity. Maybe as she was a bit older it may just be a little old fashioned of her. I dont think i will be having one visit until after baby is born.

Yeah I think you're right. She does seem really old fashioned. I can't believe how much this has got to me today!! It really helps talking to you all on here!! See I do have support

silly health visitor lady!!

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by frouphea

The Health Visitor came to see me while pregnant, because I was at increased risk of PND and PPP. It was helpful, knowing I had her support. It also meant she was able to see what 'normal' was for me, and notice quicker if there was a problem.

I can see they definitely have a role in helping with this kind of thing. And it's good to ask directly about your moods and things like that. I don't know maybe it was just cos she asked so many personal questions that it just made me feel defensive in some way. I feel really positive about this pregnancy and I suppose I didn't want her to ask me things like that. I just don't want to take on anyones negativity about pregnancy and babies I suppose.

frouphea · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by surprisebaby

Quote:

Originally Posted by frouphea

The Health Visitor came to see me while pregnant, because I was at increased risk of PND and PPP. It was helpful, knowing I had her support. It also meant she was able to see what 'normal' was for me, and notice quicker if there was a problem.

I can see they definitely have a role in helping with this kind of thing. And it's good to ask directly about your moods and things like that. I don't know maybe it was just cos she asked so many personal questions that it just made me feel defensive in some way. I feel really positive about this pregnancy and I suppose I didn't want her to ask me things like that. I just don't want to take on anyones negativity about pregnancy and babies I suppose.

I found it a bit tough at the time, I was well, happy and stable while pregnant, and didn't like the negativity, and I really thought I was going to stay well. It made it easier when I crashed after giving birth, to have someone who knew my situation. The HV visited me at home as baby was losing weight and I wasn't able to get to clinic.

KamKol · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:30 AM

Oh gosh, I'd feel so judged. Don't like the sound of this lady at all - sounds like she is nit picking to find something negative to write down.

Never had a health visitor visit my home before the birth and I don't think it would be arranged either....never knew this even happened. I heard about one lady who had a health visitor come to the home but only to check the safety of the house; like fire alarms, and where the baby will be kept, and how much have they prepared for the baby etc.

Don't let it get to you too much hun. x

KamKol · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:34 AM

Do you have any idea who arranged this visit hun? Did your MW arrange this? Is this a routine thing in your area? It just seems so random to me that she'd come and spread so much negativity.

Martz · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:37 AM

OMG! thats awful hun!

When I had my daughter I didnt meet my HV until after the birth but she was awful..I really didnt like her very much and she made me feel so pressured to do things HER way! (as it was my 1st I believed that what she said was gospel!) She really made the first few months with my daughter difficult and stressful and I have vowed that this time round if i dont like my HV i will speak up and say something....or ask for a different HV! xxx

surprisebaby · Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KamKol

Do you have any idea who arranged this visit hun? Did your MW arrange this? Is this a routine thing in your area? It just seems so random to me that she'd come and spread so much negativity.

She phoned me up about 2 weeks to arrange it. I got the impression at the time that she visits all pregnant mums before baby is born so she has introduced herself, but yeah now I am feeling a little bit paranoid about it.

I just didn't like her slant on things, made me feel like i wasn't coping (even though I totally am!!) just from the way she talked to me, almost like she wanted me to say I was depressed or something. It was really weird. I think I'll ask for another health visitor to come after baby has arrived.

Thanks Kamkol

I think I'll go and make a cup of tea and try not to take it personally. If she's like that with me, she's probably like that with everyone... will just be her manner. But yes it did make me feel really judged which is not good...xx

Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:09 AM	#11
frouphea Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 294	The Health Visitor came to see me while pregnant, because I was at increased risk of PND and PPP. It was helpful, knowing I had her support. It also meant she was able to see what 'normal' was for me, and notice quicker if there was a problem.

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Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:30 AM	#17
KamKol Pregnant (Expecting) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: UK Posts: 2,171	Oh gosh, I'd feel so judged. Don't like the sound of this lady at all - sounds like she is nit picking to find something negative to write down. Never had a health visitor visit my home before the birth and I don't think it would be arranged either....never knew this even happened. I heard about one lady who had a health visitor come to the home but only to check the safety of the house; like fire alarms, and where the baby will be kept, and how much have they prepared for the baby etc. Don't let it get to you too much hun. x

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Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:34 AM	#18
KamKol Pregnant (Expecting) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: UK Posts: 2,171	Do you have any idea who arranged this visit hun? Did your MW arrange this? Is this a routine thing in your area? It just seems so random to me that she'd come and spread so much negativity.

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Mar 2nd, 2010, 07:37 AM	#19
Martz Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 1,223	OMG! thats awful hun! When I had my daughter I didnt meet my HV until after the birth but she was awful..I really didnt like her very much and she made me feel so pressured to do things HER way! (as it was my 1st I believed that what she said was gospel!) She really made the first few months with my daughter difficult and stressful and I have vowed that this time round if i dont like my HV i will speak up and say something....or ask for a different HV! xxx

Status: Offline

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